Couch 203: The Spam and Cool Whip Couch!

Aug 28, 2019, 09:50 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SheHulk07

I'm so frustrated with myself. I went into therapy session with the intent to tell T about my SI this week. Got cold feet and started talking about my father "tickling" my feet this afternoon.

Possible trigger:

Any touch esp to my feet or boobs triggers me due to the SA. I mentioned SH and not feeling safe in my house. Just mentioning that sent me into an anxiety attack and I messed up my arm by rubbing it raw.

I couldn't put the words together of what set me off and couldn't calm down until I started driving home. Now I feel like if I mention the SI tomorrow we won't have time to discuss it because it'll be our weekend and Monday is Labor Day. I should have mentioned it today.

Possible trigger:

Kicking self in butt

Hugs just want you to know i know how you feeel

susannahsays · Aug 28, 2019, 09:52 PM

Yeah, I missed that. Why are you biting your tongue about it? What's the point? I think I'd tell the GP, too, even if she would have some sort of opinion about the email ruse. Maybe it would help you somehow if she at least knew he was being dishonest.

Aug 28, 2019, 10:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by susannahsays

Yeah, I missed that. Why are you biting your tongue about it? What's the point? I think I'd tell the GP, too, even if she would have some sort of opinion about the email ruse. Maybe it would help you somehow if she at least knew he was being dishonest.

I accidently bit my tongue while was throwing things about. He is a friend of my GP. I suppose i could tell her.

susannahsays · Aug 28, 2019, 10:09 PM

Yeah or you could book the appointment and pie him in the face. Ok, maybe assaulting him with a pie is a bad idea. You could have someone deliver a pizza with a mean message spelled out in M & Ms. Idk. Mail him a rotten fish?

stopdog · Aug 28, 2019, 10:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by healed84

T emailed me back on Monday.. and I have been trying to ignore the email. But his last line of the email “I hope you will return, so we can work through this” is haunting me. Why couldn’t he have said something that pissed me off or I could have misconstrued as he didn’t want to work with me anymore? I know seems silly.. but that would help me ignore him right now.

I mean the truth is I feel like I am done with therapy with him. Not because I think I have accomplished all I want, but because t and I are frequently dealing with more and more ruptures and it’s tiring.

But... I miss the relationship. I miss the safety I feel in his office. And I miss knowing I have that support if I need it. Which I am sure I could get with a new t. But I just don’t know if I can go through the whole process of finding and a t, retelling my story, and establishing that t/client relationship again.

I think it is good to know when you are done with a therapist. Moving to a new therapist doesn't mean you have to retell your whole story - or not in the way you did with the old one. I think you can do it with a new one. You have not been happy with this old one for awhile and he has been dropping the ball a lot. Go for what is best for you and, for what it is worth, I don't think this guy has been that good for awhile. Take your power and use it for yourself.

Aug 29, 2019, 12:25 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by susannahsays

Yeah or you could book the appointment and pie him in the face. Ok, maybe assaulting him with a pie is a bad idea. You could have someone deliver a pizza with a mean message spelled out in M & Ms. Idk. Mail him a rotten fish?

I have seriously thought about booking the appointment but i would miss the element of surprise as his window lokks into the car park.

Aug 29, 2019, 01:26 AM

I have decided, because i live in a large town if the topic of psychologists come up i will just tell my story, sow a seed of doubt etc

Lemoncake · Aug 29, 2019, 01:28 AM

I would be tempted to tell your GP the truth, that he lied simply.

ScarletPimpernel · Aug 29, 2019, 01:31 AM

I used to have evil thoughts about my ex-T. I thought about sending her tons of pictures of kittens (she hated cats), a barbie doll without it's head (she hated the smell of barbie dolls), a dead rose on our anniversary of the termination. I had other evil thoughts too. I didn't act upon any of them. One reason, I didn't want to be hit with harrassment charges. Another because I did want answers from her one day (which I kimd of got). Now that 4 years have passed, I no longer wish to harass her.

ScarletPimpernel · Aug 29, 2019, 01:46 AM

I just wrote an upset email to L. I did something "wrong" and I feel like she chastised me. I'm supposed to tell her in my emails how I'd like her to respond. Sometimes I don't know. Sometimes I just write and then send it to her without thinking. I'm hurting so much over this. I feel so bad...like I'm bad. I'm screwing up this relationship.

Aug 29, 2019, 01:53 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ScarletPimpernel

I used to have evil thoughts about my ex-T. I thought about sending her tons of pictures of kittens (she hated cats), a barbie doll without it's head (she hated the smell of barbie dolls), a dead rose on our anniversary of the termination. I had other evil thoughts too. I didn't act upon any of them. One reason, I didn't want to be hit with harrassment charges. Another because I did want answers from her one day (which I kimd of got). Now that 4 years have passed, I no longer wish to harass her.

I think my almost weekly texts and phone calls to him constitute harrassment i think its me thumbing my nose at him. I want answers but i dont want to wait, but i may have to. Hoping this will pass with me too
Hugs scarlet

Aug 29, 2019, 01:54 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lemoncake

I would be tempted to tell your GP the truth, that he lied simply.

I really want to, but i think it wont change anything, i might give it a go

Aug 29, 2019, 05:27 AM

I want to engage him in a fight that i can win. Previously he refused to fight or he talked his way out of it.

Aug 29, 2019, 06:17 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lemoncake

can you hire someone to help sort out the visa process?

Nope, I tried looking. Would be very willing to pay because I'm struggling with breaking down tasks into steps and then executing them. Friends are offering practical help like printing so I'm grateful. I just need to get stuff sorted so I can tap on their help. Big task.

On the plus side, it's the hardest visa. Once I go over, and marry, the applicstion to stay is a lot easier.

Dad is stressing the f outta me as usual. We're moving flats soon. He "forbid" me from moving out. I know I'm an adult and can go against his will but I don't want my family harassing whatever friend I stay with.

Aug 29, 2019, 06:19 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SlumberKitty

I feel overwhelmed by a friendship which makes me feel like a bad person. I also don't feel like I can take a break from this person because they are going through a lot. Not sure what I am going to do.

That's very tough. Are they guilting you when you need a break? They shouldn't be. In my limited experience, such friendships give me a ton of stress because I struggle to break away and sometimes they get verbally abusive.

chihirochild · Aug 29, 2019, 10:47 AM

Still on vacation, have to go back to work on Wednesday. I’m already dreading it.

SlumberKitty · Aug 29, 2019, 10:58 AM

I got through last night, even staying up until 8:30 AM which is unheard of for me these days. At the moment I'm feeling a smidge better but I'm worried the sui thoughts are going to come back as the day progresses. Especially if I don't have a lot to do at work today, my thoughts will be free to go dark and ruminate. So if I feel myself getting worse today, I'm going to stop and try to stop my thoughts and think about some positive things I have in my life. My friend I saw last night kind of gave me a lecture for downplaying things to my PDOC. I deserved that.

chihirochild · Aug 29, 2019, 01:17 PM

Chinese gardens

Couch 203: The Spam and Cool Whip Couch!

NP_Complete · Aug 29, 2019, 01:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by chihirochild

Chinese gardens

Couch 203: The Spam and Cool Whip Couch!

That looks a lot like the one in Portland.

chihirochild · Aug 29, 2019, 01:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by NP_Complete

That looks a lot like the one in Portland.

It is! I’m on vacation there.

SlumberKitty · Aug 29, 2019, 01:26 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by chihirochild

Chinese gardens

Couch 203: The Spam and Cool Whip Couch!

It's beautiful. It looks relaxing.

Aug 29, 2019, 01:28 PM

5 days remaining of my therapist's holiday. Why do therapist holidays go thrice as slowly as everyone else's holidays and where can I sign up for one?

NP_Complete · Aug 29, 2019, 01:36 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by chihirochild

It is! I’m on vacation there.

The Chinese garden is so tranquil and lovely, especially since it's smack dab in the city. I hope you enjoyed it. If you're still there, check out the tea room and try a flight of sake.

NP_Complete · Aug 29, 2019, 01:39 PM

And if you have time and enjoy that kind of thing, you should definitely go the Japanese Garden.

atisketatasket · Aug 29, 2019, 02:38 PM

You know it’s been a stressful first week of classes when a dentist appointment is a chance to relax.

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