Couch 207: The spiced gingerbread couch

Trying to act really casual in asking wife if she wants to deal with the garage haha she went for a nap. I tried!

Hi couch,

I have to take my youngest soon for her developmental evaluation. I hope it goes as well as it could go. I wonder if they'll tell me the results there or if I'll have to wait for a letter or call. I still havent heard from CPS to come out and meet with the caseworker and I dont have her business card to call her.

T bought out his fidgets today which was nice and helpful. The ending of today was rough...he told me even if its midnight or whatever time to call him if I really need to.
Then he texted me 2 hours after our session to tell me he has an opening tomorrow morning. I'm taking him up on that after the whole SA and CPS thing.

I gave up and went home to curl up into a ball. Only issue is that I’m currently out of town on a rotation and staying with some friends. They must think I’m lazy.

Just do whatever you need to do @chihirochild to take care of yourself and be kind to yourself. Don't worry about what other people may be thinking. Easier said than done, I know. I get into that headspace where I worry about what other people are thinking about me, way too much. But that kind of thinking only hurts me, it doesn't help me. Just be kind to yourself, and do what you can to take care of yourself and the rest will sort itself out. HUGS Kit

Hugs, SheHulk, hope it goes well. We got results right away at one of my D's assessments, had to wait a bit at others. You're doing the right thing with the assessment.

Dr. T said "It was good seeing you" when we shook hands at the end today (this is maybe the third time he's said that?). It felt genuine. And he told me good luck with things over the weekend re: D. He also was saying near the end how, if he was dealing with the same issue we're dealing with in D with his son, he wouldn't know what to do either. And that meant a lot (I told him that). I feel he was reluctant to relate to me as a father for a long time, but something shifted since I left and came back. I think maybe he realizes now that it helps validate me? That, and his saying today how most parents don't have to deal with what I deal with. That D is a very challenging child to raise. It's what I need to stop me from feeling like I'm failing as a mom. He also said how this can be a difficult thing to do, but to try to just think about "there are ways I can improve," but how that doesn't mean I'm failing now. That I can both think that I'm doing OK and that there are ways I can improve. Not one or the other. I found that to be a helpful perspective. Sharing in part in case it helps someone else.

Couch mini-poll:

Musings upon spotting a Magic 8 ball on the supermarket clearance shelf.

Would the magic 8 ball be more useful than Info?

I know which way I'm leaning.

Reply hazy, try again.

(I worked in a Spencer Gifts many years ago...)

That could be a good poll: "Do you think a Magic 8 ball would be more useful than your T?"

I like the Magic 8 ball web site (well, there are several, here are a few):

Welcome to Ask 8-Ball, The Ultimate Online Oracle

Original Magic 8 Ball | Best Online Magic Eight Ball | Magic-8ball.com

The 2nd actually simulates the shaking action. Fancy.

ETA: I asked them both the same question and got "it is decidedly so" both times. We'll see how accurate that is.

I did buy a notebook for writing that had "blah blah blah" all over the cover.

P was about as much use as a magic 8 ball, in all honesty. Working with a colleague who shares her name is hard going now.

(From 2nd site.)

"Should I dump my therapist?"

A: Outlook not so good.

"Are you more useful than my therapist?"

A: You may rely on it.

And then:

"Is my therapist a ninny?"

A: My sources say no.

Hmmph.

It went well, shorter than I expected thankfully. She does qualify for early intervention based on her speech which I knew she was a little delayed in. Now I wait for the referral and setting that up with a provider.

Oh sorry, i see your post was overlooked.

It was thursday morning american time, people starting work day. Usually we just say hi and if there is anything special on our schedule, or offer support to another person doing something.

Please stop in again! Tell us about yourself.

I was supposed to start them in August but my anxiety was through the roof. It wasnt as bad as i thought it would it be.

Ah, the relaxing sound of a cat puking somewhere...

I went out Christmas shopping today. Left around 9:30 and didn’t get home till almost 3 then went to visit my toddler twin friends until almost 6. While there I took them to Target to let them pick a toy for their birthday. I really soaked up their hugs today and them telling me “Jersey. I love you a lot.” I miss their sweet faces so so much. Back to work tomorrow at 7:30am. Debating if I want to clean my bathroom or just wait till after work tomorrow. I’ll probably just wait.

My mother and father accompanied my sister to see her lawyer yesterday. (She asked them to go). My mother told me today that she doesn’t really like the lawyer my sister chose. She doesn’t think he is aggressive enough. She didn’t tell my sister that and she’s not going to. The law is the law though and I hope this guy knows what he’s doing.

I can’t bring down my anxiety lately. Then I get more anxious about how anxious I am. It’s like this cycle I get stuck in then I can’t get out and back to baseline. Baseline is still anxious but somewhat controllable.

Apparently my old car has been towed by a repo agency and I wasn't even notified. I went by today to clean it out so I could call the scrapyard to pick it up tomorrow, and it was gone. I don't take exception so much to the fact that it was towed, since it really shouldn't have still been there, but that I was not informed that my property had been confiscated.

I don't understand how something can be repossessed and nobody has to even tell you. Then the storage fees accrue.

And I don't even owe any money. I decided not to fight back against the fact that my old apartment place ignored my dispute and filed a claim with, apparently, not one debt collection agency, but two. And neither of those agencies has sent me anything.

I kind of want to die just to avoid paying anyone anything else.

I can let these guys scrap the car but they still want $125. If I don't let them scrap it, they want $525.

The General Manager told me to write out a check for a vendor. I have a few checks that the owner signed and left for me to use in very rare cases, because we usually use the bill pay option through Chase. So I asked the General Manager for an invoice. He was like, you need an invoice? I was like, uh, yeah, I have to have something to put into the accounting system to account for the money going out of the account. So he said to write the check and he would have the vendor email him an invoice which he would then give to me. So I did because technically he is one of my bosses, but the whole thing makes me uneasy. Invoice first, then check given. Another thing to fret about at work until it gets sorted.

Looking for Netflix to download/picking out books for the trip to the mater's tomorrow.

Ideas for Netflix are welcome.

Unbelievable if you didn’t watch it yet. Read up on it first to see if it would be triggering for you.

Went to a training work today after being off all week with bronchitis. I'm still hacking up a lung (or so it feels like) - no one wanted to partner up with me (we were practicing defensive moves on violent patients) - don't blame them. Hopefully the steroids and antibiotic kick in before my shift on Saturday.

things I have recently enjoyed on Netflix:
Mindhunter (after the first couple episodes it gets much better)
Great British Baking Show
Schitt's Creek

I really enjoy Schitt's Creek too!

H finally got the letter in the mail stating that he's been founded with "minor child neglect for injurious environment." I can tell he's pissed off but he wont say anything other than accusing me of reading his mail. 🙄 Theres a form to go in front of the judge if he wants to appeal but it asks for a reason why. I dont know what he's planning on doing as far as that goes.