[Rosario]

I know I'm suffering from depression/anxiety and have for many many years. I know I need therapy, "BUT" I'm so afraid of going.

[Perna]

Hi, Rosario, welcome to PsychCentral (PC).

Therapy is scary but only a bit at a time. It starts off easy with questions about yourself, where you live, with whom, a little like any conversation. It only gets harder as you're ready for it to. Remember how scared you were when you started school as a first grader? It's kind of like that but by the time you've done most of a year, you get in a rhythm and wonder what seemed so scary at first.

[ECHOES]

What comes to mind that makes you start to feel afraid?

[jacq10]

((((((((Rosario))))))))
Try and think of it as meeting someone who has the potential to help you move on and get a healthy frame of mind? Someone who will be there to listen to you, and help you grow as an individual. Think of a kind figure, one that places no judgments, and that has the knowledge to help you to help yourself.
It can be such a good experience, and you'll see after a few sessions, that there really isn't a lot to be afraid of, because after all, a therapist is only human too
Welcome to PC

i dunno, i'm not completely sold that therapy is always a good choice... it can be, but there are so many variables. i don't feel comfortable recommending it to someone else. i do not want to scare you away from going to therapy. If you think you should go then i agree that you should. It is a thing one should do if the time is right for it. But no one can tell someone else when that time is right.

the therapy relationship is crucial, so if you decide to do this check around and find someone who feels "right" to you.

the down side to the relationship is that as you open up to this person, you can become painfully attached. That is supposed to be a healing relationship and the attachment is supposed to be necessary. i dunno... it's euphoric and painful all at once. This person will devote an hour at a time, as often as you arrange, to concentrate entirely on you. They listen to your woes, your trivial issues, abuse, crisis, everything in between. It hits you in a way that isn't quite describable.

it's double edged.

having said all of that, i am very glad to have my T right now. He is supportive and helpful. i find the attachment issue very hard but the benefits outweigh the problems right now. Once this life crisis stuff is over i am not sure what will happen or what i will feel..

i hope you can listen to what your heart is telling you.

[tulips30]

FLUFF.... That is an excellent description of why you need to give it a lot of though ahead of time. It certainly can be a "double-edged" sword. Many times I feel like I need therapy to help me deal with the heartaches of therapy.

However, when the connection is good and the the therapist is well-trained & experienced, the help can be so comforting and loving. Like you, I find the attachment issues to be the most difficult. The experience is certainly up & down and requires a real commitment to do the "work". I think only people who have really been in therapy understand the term "work"

Good luck whatever you decide. Make sure you take the time to find a "connection" you feel good about.

tulips

[sunrise]

Hi Rosario and welcome to PC. It is so hard to take that first step when we need help. It takes courage, especially when we are feeling so low from depression. I believe therapy can be helpful in many cases in dealing with depression. There are different ways that therapy can help. Different therapists have different approaches.

Some people here have written about their strong attachment to their therapist and how it can be a double-edged sword. My first therapist, who I went to see at the bottom of my depression, was a very nice and competent therapist who practiced cognitive behavioral therapy. I felt no special bond or attachment to her, but yet she was able to help me some with my depression. So I think you can still get some help without the intense attachment that others write of. With my second (and current) therapist, I did make a strong attachment, and it has been very, very positive for me, and enabled me to make even greater strides with my depression. For the most part, I now feel "cured" of my depression.

I hope you will give therapy a try. It can be so helpful just to have a person to share your thoughts and feelings with each week. It sounds simple, but can be magical. I wish you the best of luck.

Hi Rosario. What is it exactly that makes you afraid? The prosepct of therapy can be a scary thought-- opening up and trusting someone-- starting your story from the beginning, etc. Have you ever been to therapy before?

[Rosario]

Hi everyone and thanks you for posting. As to why I'm so afraid I guess it's several reasons.....
-Fear of the unknown
-Coming to terms with my "real self"
-Voicing my pain...there is something different about having your thoughts(painful ones)...feelings....inside rather then hearing them....it's as hearing them makes them come to life....hiding them inside makes me "not have to feel them" as much.
-Wondering if therapy could acually help anyways.

So, I've here first trying this out....I will try slowing....talking out my feelings. Perhaps I should blog.....has that helped anyone?

[SingDanceRunLife]

Rosario - I think you should go for it.

Just think about it. You don't have to act on it yet, but definitely think. I have a friend who told me that I should look into therapy, and at first, I completely rejected the idea although I knew he was completely right...But then after thinking about it for awhile, I decided to act on it.

I haven't started therapy yet, but I'm working on scheduling appointments.

I had/have the same fears as you do...But I also want things to change enough that it doesn't really matter. For me, it's gotten to the point where I can't handle it anymore doing things the way I've always done them, and that's why I decided to go for it.

(((Rosario)))

I don't blog, I write in a journal, but I like it. It's a good way to get things down on paper, and then it's also there for future reference.

And of course, sites like this are always good too.

[chaotic13]

Rosario,
I started therapy 7 months ago when I was in a state of depression and high anxiety. It definitely helped me get a handle on my depression and improved my communication skills somewhat. The feelings it invokes are not always pleasant, but overall I don't regret giving it a go.