Couch 214: The chihiro couch

Pretty sure it was. But i liked that show!!! I liked the neighbor, and i liked her erstwhile boyfriend. I dont know if he really was erstwhile, but he was charming. I think he was also Frasier's erstwhile beau.

I think Spock may have mind-melded us in some alternate universe.

Couch Word of the Day: erstwhile.

ETA: I can’t remember all the words of the day, but we should combine them in a sentence. Like, “The erstwhile kallipygian defenestrated...”, that kind of thing.

I had to look up erstwhile. Thanks for helping me learn something new @@!

I think English must be the hardest language.

I refuse to take responsibility for ex-hankster’s earworm.

My vote for hardest language goes to Mandarin.

I want erstwhile to mean MORE than just former. I want it to contain some um, daunted potentiality?

Think you need a German compound word, then.

I sort of liked it as well. Especially the boyfriend!

My T and I have been having a really rough time for the last few months, but it seems like things are maybe starting to get better?

We had a productive session yesterday. And then I had a moment of childish weakness and sent him a short email about something I was excited about -- how I've been offered an interview for this psychoanalytic fellowship thing I applied to a while back -- and he responded with a nice message ("!!! I am excited too, [chihiro]. Congratulations!!!"), which made me happy.

It's nice when therapy makes things feel better rather than worse.

Now it is not my wrist but my arms that are bothering me. Something is definitely attacking me from the inside. The spiky thing is running up and down my arms. I gotta talk to my therapist about this on Saturday. She might think it is a delusion. I don't know and I don't know if it matters...maybe in how I treat it? I just gotta get home from work and put some heat on my arms or some lidocaine patches. This is really bothering me. I'm trying to think of what my T might say. She would probably say, this is a psychosomatic response. Which means nothing to me because I don't understand it. Or she will say, this is a delusion that you are having. You need to not pay it any heed. I'm trying to recall her voice so the words have more power to them.

I'm sorry, SK -- that sounds really uncomfortable

I got a Shipt delivery today. Mmm, fresh food! Apples, oranges, and celery - oh, my!

aww how nice. my prof for current class commented on my most recent discussion posts from last week saying how much he appreciates my constant good humor and encouragement of my classmates. It's good to be appreciated because as we all know it's not all that easy to stay in 'good humor' during these strange days. I guess my posts have been falling under the category of "fake it til you can make it"...

Mine is more of a "if im louder my mom wont bother to assert her mood."

Dang, how do I tell my Mum I don't intend to return home?

Hugs....I hope she'll understand.

For-reals TW.

Sometimes, instead of trying to like SLIDE all the elements from one scene, one definition, one database? to another, trying to convert and get agreement on each attribute, like keeping an old car running - let her keep running her old car; you move to new dimension, new definition. You are now head of YOUR household. No permission needed or asked for, only her acceptance needed for ADMISSION into YOUR adult world.

Easy for me to say, both parents dead. But old aunts tried to take on parents' role with me - i had to say no. It felt VERY disrespectful. But that disrespect is only imaginary, i promise you.

You have proven you can take care of yourself, no? Even so, i had to go back to mother - she did not say no. Joy in her being right always wins.

My favorite night time snack right now is frozen blackberries with a teaspoon of really good balsamic vinegar.

My son has had "meltdown" after "meltdown" today. Saying that in quotations because it was more ripping up things, stomping off and locking himself in rooms.
H and I got into an argument over text this afternoon. He is now telling me that his mom is going to charge him rent so he wants to move back in the house and sleep in my father's RV in our driveway.
I'm glad I talk to T2 tomorrow and T1 on Friday. I'm mentally exhausted.

Not sure where to put this, so...

I do like a good song parody.

But trigger warning, its a corona virus parody of Michael Jackson's "Billie Jean" by a very white traditional suburban family and their Golden Retriever

Trust me, its cute. If you liked the song.

I watch their videos all the time. Love them!

Brilliant. I think I will make a test batch of summer blackberry jam with balsamic vinegar instead of lemon.

Serious question - do you think you will ever be “cured”? Will therapy ever lead to a day of enlightenment that makes us all free? Are we bound to seeking help for our lives jacked BS forever? I need a final solution? How much therapy should one have, before they say F’k it?