Disconnected...

My therapist and I are usually really strongly connected. Sometimes I have moments of doubt, but she usually always reels me back in and makes sure I feel ok and recognize that we're "together in this".

However, since the holidays, things seem so different. I feel completely disconnected from her. I feel like as I try to reconnect with her she puts up this barrier. She doesn't "reel us in" really.

I have had a lot of change this semester - I am doing 2 practicums (internships) and have 15 credit hours this semester, while also working part-time on the weekends, so I am constantly going and doing something 7 days a week. This has brought on a lot of stress, and when our stress kicks into gear, so do other things... Like abandonment fears.

The biggest struggle is my littles like to send her "love you" emails and voicemails. It's never been a problem, and she's never told them it's a problem currently. Usually once a week she tells them she loves them to, and reassures them (and me I guess) that, yes, the love is still there.

When she came back though, she has not returned the feelings. It leaves my little ones quite crushed. They have said "Do you still love us" and she has replied "Yes!" but I guess they need to hear or see the "Yes I love you" part of it.

What do I do?
How do I address this with her?
Should I address it with her?
Should I just point blank say "We're concerned because we no longer feel like you openly return the feelings we're displaying and fear that the positive loving feelings you had for us have gone away." I just know that being so open with it leaves us open to be turned down and told something like she's made a resolution to stop loving us or something!
Can anyone give advice on other ways to approach this?

(((((((((((stormy)))))))) i think you have a right to remind her that if the "rules" are going to change, she needs to tell you and the system that in advance. I just read that in a DID/MPD sourcebook that rules or means of therapy really need to be clearly defined before any changes are made.

Either tell her that, or the littles can write her a note or card maybe or draw a picture of how they are feeling right now because of the change.

(((((((((more hugs)))))))))) I hope for the best, Kiya

Hi storm,

I think you did a good job of expressing yourself in this email. Maybe you should ask your T the questions that you wrote. I think being more direct may get you the answers you need.

EV