Couch 222: Create, Cooperate, Harmonize

I had a dream a few nights ago that's been nagging at me pretty constantly to try turning it into a story. It would involve a bit of time-travel which beyond watching the back to the future movies, I have no clue.... Guess I should read up on that idea before I try to write the story....

...and maybe that will get the song Jingle Bells out of my head. I've been singing it all morning and am beginning to annoy myself hahaha

C I honestly don't think your stupid or pathetic. We leave relationships when we're ready to leave them. My favourite quote is : "We accept the love we think we deserve". When I was younger I used to think love was all you needed, but I've come to realize that it really isn't. There also needs to be a solid foundation of trust and respect too. A loving partner would respect your right over your own body over their own desires especially after you had already said you didn't want to do X. and you really do deserve to be treated better than that even if you can't see it for yourself right now.

When do you start moving?

It doesn't have to be perfect- hope you can get started soon. You can also get notes from the german show Dark. I had no idea what was going in the first half of season 3 but they explained it well at the end- they basically had two different options happening at the same time and ended up using one of those to save the day. In the Star trek movie (with Chris pine) future spock and current spock could exist at the same time. Others like Harry potter say you shouldn't mix current and past you if you travel back because it would make you insane.

Well done! We can say we knew you before you became a new york times number 1 bestseller.

oh yeah thanks for the reminder about the star trek movie! that's what i'm having a hard time thinking about - the past version interacting with the present version. i mean it happened in my dream but... it just seems so weird.

Yesterday I wanted to stay in bed all day, so I did. (Mostly--I had a massage scheduled in the morning and went back to bed after.) I kind of had to though, since I was complaining in therapy about wanting to stay in bed and my t sounded doubtful that I'd actually do it. She wondered how long I'd make it. So really, she kind of threw down the gauntlet.

I thought about doing it again today since my stated goal was forever, but I got bored and there was no coffee.

Someone left a chair sitting next to the Christmas tree, so fluffy kitten is undecorating it for me. She's batting at the ornaments until they fall off, then swatting them around the room. I ought to get out the the laundry basket so she'll hop in and put them away too.

She's having a blast so I just moved all the breakables where she can't reach.

I think I'm going to halfway take down the Christmas tree today, since our overtime has already started, and will get worse come January 1. I'm going to take all the ornaments off and put those away this afternoon, but leave the lights on it. It won't take long to just pull them off and put 'em away. The lights are my favorite part anyway especially since I moved the tree outside, right outside our window. It looks so pretty at night.

I havent felt well since Boxing day and started to develop a cold sore. This morning i woke up feeling worse and with a pain on the left side of my face. The dogs are trying to make me feel better by bringing me toys and sitting on me. I amanaged to feed and let them out for a run but i am exhausted again.

We dont take the tree down until well into the new year but i always wnt to take it down at the end of December.

My mom follows the tradition of leaving the tree up till the Epiphany (January 6).

I used to leave everything up until Epiphany.

Then I realized that I loooooooooovveee my Christmas tree! and the lights! and the decorations! until the day after Christmas. Then it magically turns into visual clutter and I get twitchy for there to be less stuff.

Now I leave the candles and the wreaths.

My mom’s decorations are quite simple. 2’ filigree tree with an off/on switch for lights, Xmas card display, stockings on the fireplace, maybe a wreath on the door or candles in the windows.

I think as a kid we used to take the tree down on new year's day.
I don't decorate at all as an adult

We usually leave them up for New Years but take them down before I head back to school (so shortly after). I love our Christmas decorations, so I try to get them up in time for Thanksgiving. It's a lot of work, so I want to be able to enjoy them for a while.

Tonight we had a family zoom party. We waited until tonight so people weren't overwhelmed by too much in one day. We're spread from New York to Minnesota to deep South and far West Texas, so it is rare for us to meet together like that. Everyone had sent photos of Christmas lights and decorations to my son who put it all together in a slide show, complete with a few Christmas games. We all came prepared with our Christmas hats and our favorite drinks (many of them alcoholic). LOL! It got rather silly toward the end. My 90-year-old dad who is in hospice called me afterward and said he really enjoyed our "wild party" LOL.

My kitchen sink has been clean for idk 2, 3 days? Its a Kwanzaa miracle!

Last session, P and I discussed ways to make our remaining time together more meaningful. Several things were proposed and we agreed on a few items. One of the things we agreed to was that he would come up with reflection-type questions about our relationship (others were more me-focused). He told me that he would email me one of these reflection-type questions this weekend. Said it several times in fact. Have I received any such thing from him as of 8:17 pm Sunday night? No I have not. How am I supposed to feel about this? I feel forgotten.

Are you not eating?

Are you not knowing me?

I don't really do xmas, but i do love putting up lights. Which i then usually end up leaving up until the end of winter - around September here. Got new lights this year and i like them so much i'm contemplating just leaving them up until they die. Or i do. Whichever comes first.

Ugh, I'm sorry you haven't heard from him. He needs to follow through on stuff like that. I'd feel forgotten, too. The idea of the questions is interesting though--is the idea that you'd both answer it?

Yes, we'd both answer. One bigger open ended question is most memorable/meaningful sessions. I have two I know for sure. I'll have to think for others.

I would be hard pressed to think of a meaningful appointment. I can remember a couple of things the first one said and then about 2 more that the second one said.
First:
"I am not the enemy"
"My other clients love me"

Second
"you are like a wounded wild animal"

I do not remember the context for either and mostly I remember them because the statements are so absurd.

I doubt either of the two women remember me at all. I would guess if I had asked them at the time the first woman would have maybe remembered I called her you people and ilk - but I doubt even that. The woman had a memory like a sieve or maybe she poured out her memories every day like Dumbledore

Leave them up if they make you happy.

I actually have tinsel in my room and hallway all year around. Hardly even notice it now .