Couch 222: Create, Cooperate, Harmonize

I've always wanted to put up those blue christmas lights around the ceiling in my bedroom. they are so relaxing. I had some for my tree a couple years ago but they already crapped out, they were cheap plastic ones I paid next to nothing for haha. When I was a kid I always loved the blue ones best. Back in the 60's we had the big glass christmas light strands or whatever in a variety of colors and I remember leaving my curtains open in the middle when i went to bed so i could see the blue ones.

I like the idea of remembering most memorable/meaningful sessions. I would have to think about that too...

Then why have it if you don't notice it? What purpose does it serve?
(I never have tinsel because of cats)

Even if I'm not consciously aware of something I like being in a room, I would notice if it were suddenly gone. Maybe it's like that.

I found out just before I went to lunch that I have to take calls this afternoon. Boo! Oh well. I'm trying to reframe it in my mind and keep it there that I'm not a doctor or nurse or other first responder so this is how I can do my part to help with the pandemic - by taking calls when they don't have enough agents because of people being out with the virus. It helps marginally to think about it that way. Callers can be SO mean though.

Got to see casual-mode Dr. T today--in a hoodie! (Which is sorta funny because I was in a hoodie, too.) Had some writing on it, but couldn't see the whole thing (just "All Day") and felt awkward being like "What does your shirt say?" He seemed self-conscious about it after I was like, "Oh, you're in a hoodie!" like seemed to be grabbing the hood and shirt some.


Was a helpful session, maybe more on it later.

I don’t remember any specific sessions. Quotes, I remember a couple. The one that sticks out is No. 1’s, “ATAT, I don’t expect you to be a reporter”—by which she meant I was trying to be objective and fair about some situation with 2ex.

My first thought when she said that was reporters don’t bother to be objective and fair anymore, so someone’s got to do it.

Do you put the hood up? I am always at a loss about the point of the hood most of the time. I don't like to wear the hood because I think they capture wind and are hard to see out of/around the hood part. And if I am not going to wear the hood - then why have it hanging off the back getting in the way when I sit down and stuff.

I am sliding into more nihilism than usual

I probably would have said something along the lines of her expectations are not my problem.

A hood up on screen would just make me think of the Emperor in Star Wars.

Ooh, Palpatine would make a great therapist: “let the hate flow through you...good...I can feel your anger.”

The only times I put the hood up on mine is if my hair is wet (like I just showered) and it's cold in the room. My H will put his hood up quite often, but he's cold all the time.

The only times I generally use hoods are on raincoats if I don't have an umbrella. And I have trouble seeing out of those, too, where if makes me nervous if I'm crossing a parking lot, say.

Dr. T did not put the hood up.

Hi All, I had a nice Christmas. Quiet though without my sister and the kiddos. I got some nice things that I really didn't expect and struggle to feel like I deserve. My parents told me to think of it this way, other people think I deserve it. I got really in a bad spot yesterday. But my Mom was kind of helpful through it and some friends that I texted. T texted me Merry Christmas or Happy Holidays or something a day or two before the holiday and that was nice, I guess, just knowing she was thinking of me. I see her this weekend anyway. My Dad had to get a Covid test and three of my cousins have it. We should hopefully get my Dad's results tomorrow. Kit

Oh, I was close to going to the hospital yesterday because I wasn't in a good spot but I figured with the pandemic that wouldn't be wise and I didn't really want to spend New Years at the psych ward. Not that I care about New Years as a holiday, I just didn't want to start out my year that way. I managed to pull myself together even though I was pretty close to beyond crisis point.

i'm more than halfway through my time on the phones today. 1.25 hours to go after my break. one of my coworkers quit last week because of them making us take calls. and another is on the verge of quitting. and they're making us work overtime already starting last week so we can keep up with our own work while we're being forced to take calls. boo.

ok Artie has been negative enough today. next post will be positive I promise.

Hugs, Kit.

Thanks Artie.

Anyone making New Years Resolutions? I don't know if I am yet. I doubt I am going to stay up for New Years because I normally go to bed at 7 PM. I might stay up until 9 which would ring in the New Year on the East Coast and just pretend that it's the same in CA but I don't know.

Night shift two of four tonight, and then I'm on backup for four days, and then I'm off for like a week (though I bet they'll need people to pick up surge shifts so maybe I'll end up going in voluntarily). Hopefully nobody gets sick and I won't get called in--I'll need a break after all the surge shifts I picked up in the last few weeks and the night shifts I'm doing now. Oof.

I did get some Hickory Farms stuff from a friend of my parents (who usually get me a Starbucks card so I was surprised when there was a big giant box for me filled with fruit and cheese and sausage and crackers) so might have that on New Years to munch on.

Good question, Kit. I'm not sure--I might make a New Year's resolution having to do with SH? Or eating more vegetables

That schedule sounds grueling.


My PCP called me after 7:30 PM last Tuesday. My appointment was at 2:30 PM. But I guess she was so busy that she was still getting back to patients that late. Luckily mine was pretty quick. 5 minutes to renew my meds. But still, those are long days. When I broke my ankle she called me at midnight (I was sleeping) to let me know it was broken. Maybe she just works late all the time.

Yeah, me too. Or exercising.

I think I'm going to - exercise also. I need to get back to walking every day! I miss it, yet at the same time, I don't get out and DO it very often. Maybe a resolution will help me keep myself accountable.

I don't bother with new year resolutions.
I did actually make an appointment with a western medicine practitioner. The first appt available appt not until the end of april. By then I may be cured or it will have killed me -but since it has been going on for years intermittently and recenly for a few months constantly - I like to think if it was all that serious, I would know it by now

Hope your shift goes fast. You're allowed to express negative feelings too, not just stick with the positive ones.