Couch 239: Cape Coral Couch

My sessions with L were almost always 60 minutes, sometimes a little over if we were in the middle of something (except for a short time when we did only 30 minutes at my request), I guess that's one advantage to being self-pay there were no insurance constraints. Insurance would have allowed 45-50 minutes if I remember correctly.

So I am still feeling really positive about this cbt program I'm doing. I had another phone call with my coach a little bit ago, I'd asked her to talk more about the circle of control/circle of influence/circle of concern bullseye thing cuz that really resonates with me. It was a good discussion, although brief (I get only 15 minutes a week after the initial 30 minute call). But it's good, it is a wonderful change of pace from the open-ended, wandering-through-my-psyche journey that therapy with L was (as much as I did enjoy it at the time, in retrospect, I wish things had been different with her. Then again, maybe it just was what I needed it to be at the time, so I shouldn't second-guess it huh.) Methinks I very much like having a time limit on this. Yesterday I was working through my weekly activities on the app and set that goal to make a dentist appointment today, well I did it, I called them and scheduled for Sept 9. They only have morning hours on Fridays (my day off) so I had to schedule out a bit which is fine. I'm not having any dental problems so it's just gonna be a checkup.

I am so lucky, because I see both of my T's through insurance, and both give me 60ish minutes. My trauma T usually goes over by 5 or 10.

I ordered a blt out today which I rarely do because they always screw up the bacon but this place grows its own lettuce and tomatoes so my usual reluctance was overborne by the promise of a tomato with flavor. The tomato was delicious but the bacon had rigor mortis

I adore floppy bacon. The grease!

I love crispy slightly overdone bacon.
In other news a guy came to clean my air conditioner, which is only 2 years old, and broke it. He was cleaning it and somehow caused a gas leak. He is going to replace it but still i was having such a good day til then

That's awful, BCM!

I don't understand these things well enough to appreciate how it happened, but it's a pain in the neck nonetheless.

The university is now insisting on labeling two days a semester as mental health days which I think is insane but I do love the law school because we are putting ours on Fridays when we don't hold classes anyway. This delights me. But I believe it is more because of the ABA required number of classes rather than the administration of the law school taking a stand for stomping out nonsense.

My labs are back already, my thyroid numbers are not any worse than they were last time so that's good. My TSH was actually lower than last time. Maybe she won't change my meds after all, I dunno. We shall see. Other levels she hadn't checked before were in the reference range, so maybe it was for nothing and my thyroid hasn't been contributing to my anxiety after all. I confess I kinda felt relieved when I thought it was, that a change in meds would 'fix' it. But honestly I'd rather not be getting sicker just to be able to blame anxiety on it.

SD: My mother cooked floppy bacon. I cannot stand it that way. The fat is too much on evidence. I have always trimmed all the fat from my food, ever since I was tiny. This does not work with floppy bacon. The smell of bacon and eggs cooking has always made me feel physically ill and I blame the floppy bacon!

Also SD: They are designating two days on the calendar, and telling students they must schedule their "mental health days" then? Uhm, that's not how it works. The whole purpose of a mental health day is that you can take it whenever you want, even when you don't have an illness bad enough to go see an MD for a note. Scheduling them ahead of time entirely defeats the purpose.

Our masters students have each class once a week for 3 hours. Out of 14 weeks, they can miss 2 without it directly impacting their grade. (After that, we deduct points from the course average.) So our students already get two "mental health" days. I refuse to arbitrate what absence are "legitimate" or ask students for proof of their reasons for not attending, so they can use them for whatever they like. If a crisis comes up and you've already used your two absences, don't come crying to me.

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me too Artie!

I have managed to convert all my lovers to floppy bacon -but it is a topic of conversation from what they report after meeting each other. I always give someone the option of cooking their own - I won't bring myself to commit bacon crimes but if that is how they like it -it is okay with me if they want to make it and eat it. (but since bacon is not a regular item on my menu and usually breakfast isn't either - it really never came up a lot) I also cook pork medium - so much more flavor (and converted my friends to this as well). Basically chicken is the only thing I don't eat rare to medium and even there I am conservative about over cooking it. I have never gotten sick nor has anyone from eating my cooking. And my friends keep coming over so there we have it. At this point in our old lady lives it is mostly moot because almost all of us have stopped eating meat on a regular basis. The smoked jerky I made was for my nephew and his friends.

Here the university has required each unit to schedule two days - the undergrads have two days set and the professional schools get to set their own. The students don't -that would be even more insane. I don't think there is a good purpose -it is pandering pure and simple. I do give two absences without penalty - I beg them not to bother me with the reasons for such. After that - the ABA bar comes in to play because of required hours of instruction.

I am about to try my first dog grooming groom - my groomer retired over covid and left the miserable state I live in and I don't trust him with many people (he is sensitive -and this isn't even my super tweaky one - I would probably not be near either of them as people but in a dog I am okay). I got a force dryer and everything.

Just got back from my liver ultrasound. So nervous to get the results back. I hope it's not as bad as what my labs say it is. Well, if it is a fatty liver, it will just qualify me even more for bariatric surgery.

Hugs, Scarlet. I hope you get results soon and they aren't bad! I think some medications can raise liver enzymes, too--is it possible that's what is going on?

Just finished cleaning out my closet, found a lot of interesting things but not what I was looking for.

Not sure. The only things that I know of that would have effected my liver is around 8 years of daily Ibuprofen (had severe teeth pain when I was agoraphobic), my weight, and my A1C.

The doctor also just put me on cholesterol meds. I'm not going to take them until I get on bc, however. I don't want anything to happen to a possible pregnancy even if my chances are so so low.

my h has been going through the diagnosing etc of fatty liver disease, ultrasounds, other tests and last time he saw the liver dr they told him to stop taking all of the vitamins and supplements he'd been taking because of that, including vitamin c. he had been taking huge doses of it, not just taking a regular amount. I never had a clue.

Hugs, Scarlet, I hope you don't have to wait long and that the results aren't as bad as you fear. my h was recently diagnosed with fatty liver and so far they've just told him to change his diet which he is slow to do.

I went for a mammogram today. It was humiliating because the gown they gave me was too small. I also forgot how much they have to manhandle you during the procedure. Fun times. Not as bad as a pelvic exam, but not something I look forward to in the future either.

I'm sorry you felt humiliated. The gowns are always too small for me, so I can relate. I hate how they always make you stand in the most uncomfortable position possible on your tippy toes and twisted half around and then tell you to hold your breath and not move. Yeah, right. Although my mother tells me that I should be thankful that I'm um, heavily equipped let's say haha it's easier that way, supposedly. Someone needs to invent a better machine that's for sure. I have my next one coming up I think in October.

I hate that! I call it going shopping in my closet. The things I find in there got crammed in there for a reason!

I hope you find the item.

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I hate the manhandling too. Thanks for reminding me, I need to schedule one.

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Wow. I signed up with the imaging place's portal, and I got my results already: enlarged fatty liver and two gallstones.

Again, maybe this will nudge my doctor towards referring me to a bariatric program? H was really good about it. He's going to allow me to buy an under-desk bike to ride on the patio. He's also going to allow me to buy protein bars again.

SI Trigger:

For now, I'll try, but I don't know why.

Hugs if wanted, Scarlet.