This email was in response to me asking about going twice a week and him saying no. It was also about the enormous emotions I have started to feel that come out of nowhere.

<font color="#000088"> It is not my plan or intent to make you suffer out of therapeutic goals or anger at you. I do hear your pain and I appreciate your stating it directly rather than couched in threat or manipulation. The question remains, what is the crisis you face? Your and my relationship is not in danger. Whatever need you feel is one you've carried with you for years and will not destroy you. Be still. As one book on mindfulness is titled, "don't just do something, sit there." The answer to your struggle is not outside you but within. </font>

[krazibean]

Hi. Your T sounds very nice and caring. If this email was helpful to you, then great! my only thing is, if it were me, i'd be like HUH! you just described to him how him saying no was hurtful and all that, and he comes back with the answer is within you? isn't the crisis you face the fact that you want to see him more and he said no? the fact that you want him to be your friend and he can't? i dunno, if it were me i would feel like his answer was insufficient. him saying the answer is within you seems lazy.

i'm sorry, like i said if his email really did help you then that's great. i think i'm just being negative because i've recently had a rupture with my T so anything anyones T says might not seem like enough to make me feel better, haha. so sorry for the negativity, but i just wanted to put in my two cents.

[Brian37]

funny I got an e-mail reply from my T today as well....I was wanting
to set up sessions and was looking for a "hang in there" statement and all I got was ..."try this and feel free to think about it".....oh well
......life goes on

[Perna]

I love the reassurance about you all's relationship with one another.

[Fuzzybear]

I think T's, being human beings (mostly) are influenced greatly by their personal history, experience, and their own analysis, if any.

Sometimes twice a week therapy creates a greater need which the T still can't fill, maybe that was what he was thinking. Personally I wish any of the T's I've seen had ever written such an intelligent and caring email But it still sucks, very much, hearing "no"

But I like how he reassured you that your relationship with him is safe

[MissCharlotte]

(((Sol)))

Did you feel reassured?

</font><blockquote><div id="quote"><font class="small">Quote:</font>
? Your and my relationship is not in danger.

</div></font></blockquote><font class="post">

Now if that were for me, I would cut it, paste it in really really large font and print it out and hang it on my night table.

Do you think your husband would mind?

The crisis I am facing is that I'm experiencing major emotions from the past (the twice a week thing is one in the present). I love that he keeps telling me that we are okay, even after I've said a lot of things in anger, he's still here. I really did feel reassured (there is a little more to it than what I have written, but too long to write). He also scheduled a time today to see him. I feel like he did listen, he did hear me. Hopefully tomorrow will be a good session!

[Kiya]

your t is so zen

Kiya,
Yes, he is definitely zen! No doubt.

[chaotic13]

</font><blockquote><div id="quote"><font class="small">Quote:</font>
Soliaree's T said:
As one book on mindfulness is titled, "don't just do something, sit there." The answer to your struggle is not outside you but within.

</div></font></blockquote><font class="post">

This response really spoke to me. Sometimes I get so caught up in trying to DO something immediately to fix things. For example I had a bad session this week from my perspective. I really want to call my T and schedule another appointment immediately to talk about what I'm feeling. But what I really need to do is sit on things for a while and try to work through stuff on my own. Would it be nice to have her help?.. yeah. But then again, at least today, I feel like I'm making some progress without her. That's probably better in the long run.