Couch 247: Choose Cheese!

There are so many reasons I wouldn't make it in the Mob (way too much hugging and kissing and loud) - but attys have to fight when clients are around and in court and stuff but then go with the same opponent to lunch together or have meetings on other cases, or whatever etc.

I didn't check the boxes about how I know how to make others comfortable.
But the overwhelming of sound/chaos etc is where I get the score

Nitrates disagree with me, all that gabagool..

I have had fun watching a Canadian (I think) cartoon called Fuggetabout It - a mobster's family from nyc is placed in the witness protection program in Regina, Saskatchewan.

A rare hothouse flower, from which comes a deadly poison that an extinct South American tribe used to rub on the tips of their war spears to slay their enemies?

You’re more sensitive than Art!

I am guessing we excel in different categories.

@ Art how are you feeling?

thanks Lemon. I'm okay. H has been surprisingly upbeat today, I think the long drive to/from new mexico yesterday helped him clear his head some. he has agreed to go see his dr about getting on medication for depression. that's a little progress.

Without being seen to be adding fuel to the fire, but did he apologise for his behaviour?

he did. he said that he just needed to get it all out.

today is our anniversary (26 years).

Does anybody else watched Smothered on TLC? Its about how shall we say - mothers who love too much. One former beauty queen takes a bath with her pageant teenage daughter in celery juice every morning, while they drink celery juice.

Thats the lead-in to my announcement that i just prepped another 4 bunches of celery, romaine and guac ready to go for the week. I ordered some flavored protein powders that you can add to
oatmeal, those i will try to make my cupcake ah whats the word? Fancy word for tricky
replacement.

My newest addiction is peach waffles. Belgian waffle batter with diced peaches & cinnamon added. Super yum. I made them again today for dinner; I made 3, so have leftovers.

Never seen it. Celery juice baths? How do you get enough celery juice to bathe in it?!

I cannot abide celery. It's a texture thing.

I like celery juice but how much celery would it take to juice enough to bathe in? That sounds like a lot of work just for a bath

I think that's the show where the mom and adult daughter were so enmeshed that they showered together every day. On top of whatever other cringy stuff they were doing.

Yikes the mother has boundary issues. Do they offer any support or is it like Kate and Jon plus 8?

I baked for the first time in my new place. I bought the pre-made just add eggs, oil and water box. It was supposed to be muffins, but they didn’t include the paper cups, so I just put it all together and it made a muffin cake.

Thats how ive been making my oatmeal.

The pageant girl has two normal looking older sisters who serve as her and her mother's minions in pageant support. They also do stuff like read and go to college. The pageant girl lost her previous
contest because she misunderstood the "think on your feet" question as ""the right to bare arms" - as hers are very hairy, so she wishes she had that right, right?

Her mother was Miss Connecticut USA 30 some years ago, so "they" feel it is her legacy to rewin that crown. This year she placed 4th again and the judges told her she lacked life experience, which i thought was pretty amazing of the judges to say (in response to her asking). She is very pretty but she looks like nobody is home. Kinda sad. But very interesting psychologically.

They don't offer support. Adults are free to do as they please. Their partners etc often try to intervene but mostly its just me screaming at the tv.

This is soooo me.

People who were overly criticized growing up usually display these 9 behaviors (without realizing it)

omg me too.

I have some and don't have some (I don't over apologize nor am I a people pleaser). I guess I look at some of those things and wonder what was done to mothers or fathers or X. I wonder if it is sometimes just a mismatch of personality or the other worries they might have had etc. Not to mention some of it just being fear - they are afraid for the child and have no knowledge of another way to keep the child safe. My mother (and my sibling) were terrified about me being hurt or killed because I am lesbian. I don't know why, but my sibling burst into tears and asked how I would keep myself self from ?? I really don't know who they thought was going to get me. But it was actually out of concern even if doofy.
I mean Exhankster - didnt your parents have to learn a whole new culture?

Thats just it, they did not adapt to the new culture. They said pretty much every day that we were italian, not american, and we would live as they had lived. My mother told me i was lucky she let me go to school, as her mother pulled her out of school after grade 3 to work on the farm. They were sharecroppers so they were very poor. Her home had a dirt floor. My paternal grandfather was the italian grandpa trump, only not successful, just very mean.

So growing up meant trying to create order out of absolute chaos. Building a house in a continuing war zone. If i showed any sense of pride or competence, my mother would blow me back to ground zero psychologically, not just a gentle tamper down. Reading Ms. Magazine on the one hand, and on the other, my dad telling me not to read Mad Magazine because my kids would turn out deformed like Alfred E Newman. It was Garbage In, Garbage Out. How could it be anything else?

ETA - So my latest thing is, why has it always been so hard for me to do the right thing for myself? When really, isn't it very easy? Eat vegetables, get exercise, clean up as you go.

Same here. Though some of them are improving with therapy.

I’ve got like two of them.

Ex-husband, though, has all of them, which makes sense given his parents.

Another apostrophe-hater…

Or typo more like

I am not saying she was a good mother to you. I am saying put in a different context - look at all she was dealing with. Or not - I just find it interesting to think about.

I find it interesting too. She was very women's lib when it came to herself, even before it was a thing. Like early 50's. In terms of work, her relationship with my dad, splitting housework, etc. But she (and my dad) expected me to be the italian submissive traditional wife (and child) they never were. So they gave me chaos. Nowhere to stand. Invisible.