(((Mouse))),
That's a good idea. Then you can look forward to T coming back and having a stress-free week off of work. Take care.

[lauren_helene]

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Soliaree said:
I'll one up that, almeda, by saying that they should invite us to go with them on their vacations. Think of how much we could enhance their trip? Why hasn't anyone ever thought of this before? LOL

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My T would need therapy after a vacation with me!! Good one Soliaree

[Christina86]

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Soliaree said:
((((((((((Christina))))))))))))))),
Ouch! Therapist interruptus. Best of wishes to you in finding a new T

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Coined a new term?

I like your display pic. Thanks... I figure I'll look when I get back from vacation in June. *shrug*

someone help me set a trap!!!! urgent!!!! he's going to escape a week from now.... oh poo

then near the end of May he's going again!!! Not if we can trap him first!

he did say the coolest thing though... i asked him if having people get upset that he goes away was an ego trip and he looked pained and said it made him anxious He is such a good guy.

[Kiya]

hmmmmmmmmm... ya know i think i've heard of this "T Glue" that is supposed to work.... put it in their chair right before your last session before a vacation (perferably if it is the *day* before they leave) and it is guaranteed to keep them in their chair for the duration - or your money back.

[Kiya]

So, how is everyone doing out there?

[krazibean]

My T is officially gone as of yesterday and i never heard from her. We don't even have an apt set up for when she gets back.... this makes it harder for me to believe i'll see her again I think i'm numbing myself to her right now and breaking the connection so it doesn't hurt as much. Going back (if i do?) is going to be really hard.

How is everyone else?

[sunrise]

(((krazibean))) Maybe while she is away you can get up the courage to call her and leave a message about scheduling an appointment when she returns. Then the ball is in her court when she gets back. Hang in there.

Kiya,
T-Glue, huh? I like it. So, can you also glue your T to yourself and make him/her portable? This would also make appointments obsolete. I hope you're running on the way to the patent office, LOL.

((((Krazibean)))))),
I know she'll be there for you when she gets back. Hold onto us until that time Take care of yourself!

[ziggy1]

(((((Kraz)))) You will see her when she gets back. I'm most sure of it. I would take sunrises advice and give her a call
leave a message, make an appt.

Let her know you want to follow up with her. I know you do or you wouldn't be voicing your concern here...Listen to yourself!

Write it down and make a promise to yourself...Sound Good..?

Hang in there
You can do it

[Kiya]

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Soliaree said:
Kiya,
T-Glue, huh? I like it. So, can you also glue your T to yourself and make him/her portable? This would also make appointments obsolete. I hope you're running on the way to the patent office, LOL.

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Hehehe... portable t. too funny!! give you a gold ribbon for making me laugh out loud =)

[ECHOES]

((( to all )))

vacation, the time between sessions.. it's so hard sometimes.

[krazibean]

sunrise, i kinda did "put the ball in her court" because i emailed her the day before she left expressing that i was upset i never heard back from her again. I was very nice about it and apologized if she was still planning on calling and i just wasn't giving her enough time, but then i never heard from her. she just up and left for vacation. so i'm not sure what to do. i don't know if i want to leave her a message asking for an appointment. i mentioned in the email that i was upset she was leaving without us having an appointment made. so i made it clear she needs to contact me back so we can make another apt and clear things up. its just a matter of waiting, which is so painful.

Bean....

Are you sure she read the emails?

Perhaps trying to get her work done and get ready for her trip, she did not check her email?

Personally, I think it sucks and would also be mad at T for not calling me again, but ......

[Mouse_]

one more week to go, and I was doing ok, today I feel the life is being drained out of me and any reason for living is far, far away...I know this must be an "ego state" because in reality I have my family right here, I mean right here, one of my daughters is sitting in the next chair eating chocolate biscuits and watching TV, unyet I feel detached from this, I feel isloated and alone and very down. I'm almost tempted to email T and just say hi, but I dont feel I should do this whilst shes on vacation. I thought perhaps I should email all up-beat and say hi, hope your enjoying your vacation, but I dont feel like that, I need her, the "HER" thats in the room with me, not the woman on holiday...what do I do?

{{{{{{Krazibean}}}}}}

I'm sorry you didn't connect with T before she left. She was probably busy trying to get out of town, but I know that doesn't help you right now. I hope you're able to reconnect with her right when she returns and feel better.

{{{{{{Mouse}}}}}}

That is JUST how I felt in the middle of T's vacation. It felt SO long since I had seen him, and SO long until our next appointment. I felt like I was in the abyss - I had a couple of really dark, weepy days. Posting here helped, and I used some of my real life coping mechanisms - having lots of my kids friends over to fill the house up with people and distract me, talking to dh and friends, etc. It wasn't the same as T - not at all - but it kept me distracted from those dark feelings and made the time pass.

Good luck to both of you. Keep posting here so we can support you!

An update on me and my T's vacation...

He came back

We had our first post-vacation appointment this afternoon. This was our first separation after starting therapy 5 months ago. I kept asking him "Does this feel weird to you??" and he was like "noooo...." lol

He did say he wondered before I came what it would feel like - if the energy between us would be the same - but he said he felt like it was. I was happy to be there, but it felt kind of surreal and I felt kind of disconnected from him, which is what I was afraid of.

We talked about that feeling, and he was so reassuring. He said he was happy to be with me again, and that he values me and our relationship. We had our usual discussion about whether or not our relationship is "real" (this is a big issue for me) and he said it IS real - his feelings for me are real, and the things that happen between us are real. I could feel something opening in me - a vulnerable place that I had closed off while he was gone. By the end of the appointment, I think I did feel reconnected - in that new and kind of painful way that I feel attached to him.

So....hang in there everyone who is missing their T. They'll be back, and it will be okay.

Thanks to everyone for supporting me while he was gone. It helped a LOT.

[Kiya]

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Mouse_ said:
I need her, the "HER" thats in the room with me, not the woman on holiday...what do I do?

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=( EMAIL HER!!! Go on! SHe told you you could - she's probably wondering right now how you're doing and where is your email!?! My old t used to actually tell me that when she got back.

It's ok, mouse, email her!!!

[Kiya]

Earthmama - YAY! you made it =) Glad to hear things are good there.

Likewise I saw my MD today (after 2 months, when I usually see her every month). I hadn't even called in weekly updates in a month. So today she put me on Lexapro and said "You have a job - to call me every week and tell me how you're doing on the Lexapro." The connection was there just like it had always been there... and then starts to fade as soon as i walk out of the office. But she said to me "You have people who care about you!!! I for one, your PsyD, for 2." It's a sadly short list, but I was glad to hear her voice include herself and my t... t will be gone next week for 11 days. MD wants me to possibly hook up with another T specifically for DID/MPD since my poor t is so clueless on how to help me.

[MissCharlotte]

Earthmama,

Woooo Hooooo !!!

Yay! T is back. And he sounds wonderful, and supportive and sensiive!

Peace

[krazibean]

i drove by T's office today and looked at her window as i drove by. I imagined her saying, "My job is to make sure you're okay out THERE" pointing to the road i was driving on.

You know what? I reallly miss her.

I've been eating a lot lately and i feel like i've gained a little weight. i don't know how many of you would understand this but.... i don't want to see her if i'm any fatter. i feel like since eating is something we talk about that she looks to see if i've lost or gained everytime she sees me. and since it will have been 2 weeks next time i see her it will be kinda obvious. i don't know why that bothers me so much.

Anyway, i miss her a lot.

[Mouse_]

Didn't email T....done some journaling last night because I forgot thats one of the things that gets the wheels turnign nicely, and mananged to let that part of me go back into its place and not be the dominant part that is running the show...today I feel better then yesterday...better able to tolerate the feelings off life not always feeling honkey dorey and forgot that no one promised it would always feel honkey dorey...that part of me that was up front was not settling for anything less then perfection to hide its fears of not getting enought...

[Perna]

The biggest thing that ever helped me was my T teaching me that feelings constantly change and you can stand one until the next shows up. I already knew I could "wait" really good so learning and then experiencing that things would in fact change make it much easier when I was totally done-in. I could go into deliberate wait mode and that would give me enough "hope" to move me forward.

[Mouse_]

perna, Can you explain your post a bit more, I can't quite get what your saying, thanks.