[missboots]

I am and wonder why am I here? Is my life so bad that I need to pay someone to stroke me, pat me on the back, only say good things to me etc... I admit I HATE ME! I do not see how my self hate will change by listening to a Therapist say good things to me. Will I ever heal or is Healing when death comes? I read all the posts on here and Wonder if anyone feels so low like I do? I am a Mom to a 4 yr old and 16 month old and I go for them! I do not want to screw them up.

[Kiya]

HI - well... therapists really work in a way different than just saying good things about you.
THey work to help you uncover stuff about yourself; why you hate yourself, why you might not want to stick around for your kids, what led to that... etc.
it's worth investigating.
welcome.
kiys

[Ltr2Hermione]

Post deleted by Ltr2Hermione

[Behindthemoon]

Mmm, are you on meds? if yes, how many have you tried? Are they working? i can relate to this kind of feeling you have cause i used to feel that way too...
just take care

[silentlyscreaming]

Kiya and moon both riase really good points.
When i read your post, i just started thinking about when I started therapy and even though you know it's not a quick fix, you still have some expectations there. You form your own ideas about how it should go, and what the outcomes could be. I don't know if that is valid or relevant, just a thought.
As for the pat on the back stuff, I used to hate that, I felt like i was being patronised, getting praise just because i managed to get out of bed, like....grr. She stooped being so full on with it after that.

Have you told your therapist you feel this way? If you have, how did it go? If not, do you think it may help?

[Angel_of_the_Past]

I know how you feel, I hate every ounce of myself and my life-every day. It is an everyday struggle to want to stay alive. I wish I was in better shape so I could offer you some advise but all I can do is say I'm right there with ya.

[missboots]

Thanks everyone for your support. I feel like I know all of you because I read each and everyones posts. I seen T yesterday and I feel much better. I do see things in a different light. She has shown me that my parents never kept me emotionally safe. I never thought of some of the stuff she has said until she guided me to see it her way. I love T and am starting to trust her much more. Oh to answer your questions I am on anti depresents, I have told her it is hard to come to therapy and talk about my childhood. She says I am couarigous.

[emilyjeanne]

When I first started therapy I felt the same way you do. Therapy is hard work. Keep your head up and continue to go. The eventual outcome is worth the effort.