power & control in dating relationships

In factFutz, they were all very charming!!!

Bobbi, smart to recognize these people are charming. Maybe if we just went for nice instead of charming?

Yeah, well I'm done, think I'll find me a grilfriend instead.

Funny you should say that. Check out my profile! LOL!

funyy how you get a sense of ppl without really knowing them.
By the way very nice pic.

PS: You should see my garfield collection! one of my favorite characters

i am in the same situation ,iunderstand what you are talking about,i used to taket it very well but now i have depression ,i am not the same person i used to be.

Hi Thanks for This~ I've been in your shoes too? I have a sociopathic boyfriend. I've tried on numerous occasions to show him how. I feel and appreciate him but right now he's a really hard person to please and. I don't know why he's such a hard and pessimistic man right now towards me?

Thanks for this info. I keep it in my threads to remind me of how it really was, instead of how I wish it was or could be. I have been on a time out from my ex for four days now. No contact! Which was huge for me. Looking at the wheel I can see that we were escalating, because all the blaming, minimizing, threats, intimidation, jealousy was already there for awhile. I just kept thinking we could talk our way through it somehow. Now I am on day five and my "forgetter" wants to paint a rosy afterglow..."oh, it wasn't that bad...maybe that we have both calmed down we could talk rationally, etc."

but, reading the forums everyday on this site helps remind me that yeah, it was that bad. we were not good for each other. I am also seeing my part in it. Alot. Because I am a borderline, there is a part of me that is drawn to drama. So, thanks for the reminder. I needed it!

You're speaking my language sista! Beautiful explanation shows you have grown from your experience good for you. I'm recently in a relationship about a year now and i'm just beginning to experience abuse in every form you described it's painfull and it's my first rodeo i find myself crying more frequently then not...... Very sad situation and hard to walk away....

Followed the link sabby, that was my father and my husband. Years of intimidation. Not physical but manipulation and and control....me being the subjective one. I mention this only because everything I was...I am. Everything in my past affects what I am today.

But you would be a different person if the past didn't affect the future... and you are great just as you are x

Awwww.....sweetie, thanks

I've been troubled lately trying to make this a different place in a different time. I guess I should have said "ex-husband." After so many years of training I let people boss me around. I keep reminding myself.... "Never be afraid to say what you feel"

I am also my mother's child who taught me to always say it with tact

you know, I get really tired of people using bipolar as shorthand for abusive behavior. yes, it does coexist, but calling names doesn't help. it will help you by thinking of him as a person and not a disease

I suppose I did to my ex what studelit's boyfriend is doing to her. I wish I could say hang on, it will get better, but it won't. He does not even realize what he is doing. If you really want to love him and can protect yourself physically then stay. If not, move on.

I recognized all but 1 trait in my abusive husband, no sexual abuse but very scary seeing it written down...now he knows though I am splitting from him, he's like a lost little boy !!!

I really liked this!!! Thank you for sharing. Sometimes we forget what controlling behavior is like or think maybe what we are experiencing is not as bad as we think it is... It is always nice to confirm what we already believe.

thank you for saying this, i really needed to hear/see that right now. i don't think i'm beautiful because of all my flaws, and i sometimes fail to see the strength i have BECAUSE of those flaws. it's still a struggle, every day.

Everything is so new agedne I am so old school, I cant find the link and In def interested in lookin. Maybe its because I am mobile perhaps?

I need help! I am in a mentally and verbally abusive relationship. I have a 3 y/o and this is not her father. I have no money, no close friends or family. I also have no car. He is very controlling of me and my kid. Please help. I need to get out asap. Any info would be greatly appreciated.

Can you get into a shelter? If so, I would find one, right away. Never allow anyone to abuse you. If you don't get away right now, you will be teaching your child that this is acceptable behavior.

It Sure Is, I Go Through Missing My Ex Alot.

I'm hoping someone can help me with a recent break up.I can't keep a relationship last more than 5 months.

This is a great post. Thank you!

I've come to realize some serious things about my current relationship. I'm inspired to write some things out and take some big steps.

Its amazing mow often you forget the characteristics of an abusive person. When your in it, it is very hard to see clear the 'ways' of abuse. Thanks