[wi_fighter]

My ex is taking my daughter for four hours of testing today, hoping to overturn her ADD diagnosis.

No teacher forms were handed out since school is out. So 9 years of teacher observations won't be considered, just this doctor's one visit.

My ex even told me I wasn't to call the doctor ahead of time so I wouldn't sway his opinion, and that my presence at the visit was not required.

I'm pissed. If I find out his g/f went with them, I'm going to be EXTREMELY pissed.

[wi_fighter]

He also didn't have the records released for her original assessment. He only released records from her current doctor, so this neuropsychologist will have no info from previous testing either.

I'm getting angrier and angrier the more that I think about this.

My ex is court ordered to give her medication, so he wants the diagnosis revoked.

[mrb020377]

My thought is this:
How is getting ti changed going to benefit your daughter? Obviously It won't. Does he not understand that this world does not revolve around him.......

i have a name for him.....but i will refrain

[gardenergirl]

Did she take her medication today before the eval? I do ADHD evals for adults, and we always make sure they are off meds in order to get a true picture.

What kind of doc is doing the testing, do you know?

gg

Shirley,

I can imagine all the emotions you must be feeling... that would be hard. --- Not being there for your child's diagnosis.

My youngest son had ongoing problems for years in school, but I didn't think to take him to a doctor for evaulation until he was in 6th grade- by the urging of his teacher. It only took one hour for them to conclude that he was ADD.

If your daughter is anything like my son and this doctor she will be seeing is knowledgeable, even without the 9 years of teacher observations the doctor should be able to diagnose in a short amount of time.

Good luck with it all!!

Mandy

[wi_fighter]

GG, she's seeing a neuropsychologist.

She didn't take her medicine. She only takes it during the school year, but we're having a hard time getting one that helps her attention but doesn't make her lose weight. She's 14 and weighs less than 60 pounds and is only about 4'6". Concerta works, but now she needs a higher dose, and we're afraid of the weight loss.

Mel, her dad wants it overturned because he doesn't like people who need to be fixed. If she doesn't have the diagnosis, then in his mind it means there's nothing wrong with her that strict discipline can't handle.

[gardenergirl]

Sounds like she will get a solid eval, and I agree that it will show up in testing even without the teacher's evals. Will you be able to talk with this doctor at all? It would seem like that would be your right, and I think if I were doing the eval I would want to know how she does in all environments.

In the meantime, take deep breaths. You and your ex differ on what it means to have a diagnosis, and it sounds like you really care and understand. Maybe the neuropsych can explain it to your ex in a way that helps him to understand, too.

gg

[mrb020377]

I have a hard time understanding people who think that just because a person needs help in a certain area, that they need to be "fixed".
I feel for you and your daughter. I can only imagine how frustrated she is right now. I can only imagine how frustrated you are......

I hope that hte dr does give in and doesnt overturn the diagnosis.... for both of you!!!!!
I wish that you could have gone with her.

[wi_fighter]

Thanks Mandy.

She's not hyper. She's the kind of kid who spends 45 minutes getting her papers and pencils ready to do her work, and then something catches her attention and she completely forgets about it. She's daydreamy and distractible. I don't know if the doctor will see that in a few hours.

I don't like that I was INSTRUCTED not to be there. I don't like that my ex found this doctor and made the appointment before he mentioned it to me. Only after he had a time allotted did he e-mail and ask if it was OK to take her. The doctor we were referred to when she was first diagnosed - 9 years later my ex says her diagnosis was wrong because it was her first year in practice. Like all those years of medical school and internship were meaningless?

[wi_fighter]

Mel, my daughter doesn't even know she's going. If she did, I KNOW she'd have said something to me.

[wi_fighter]

GG, my ex told me NOT to contact the doctor ahead of time so my opinions wouldn't sway his diagnosis. He said "all of your opinions are in Dr. Sipple's notes."

The doctor is only going to talk to me after he tests her and makes his diagnosis. My ex ASSURED me that he wouldn't say anything to possibly alter the dr's assessment either. Like I can trust that. Ha!

Shirley,

Yes, that's exactly like my son-- he's not hyper at all. It's my understanding that ADD-- is the attention defecit disorder without the " hyper " as in ADHD.

Within that hour evaluation he was distracted by the ticking clock at which he looked at for several minutes-- when they were giving him a timed test!! There were other signs of it that the doctor saw easily within that hour.

His focus is just not there! He losses things all the time.... turns papers in late all the time.... doesn't hear upcoming test or assignment accouncements due to his daydreaming. It's been a real problem!!

Yeah, being INSTRUCTED how things are going to be, is not right. Hang in there!!!

Mandy

[wi_fighter]

Mandy, your son sounds JUST like my daughter.

Now I feel a little relieved.

[gardenergirl]

Shirley,
I think I understand what your ex is saying about his worry that you might sway the diagnosis. But that is the doctor's job to manage. It's his job to take in all the information and evaluate it in order to come up with a diagnosis.

I can see the position you are in, and it stinks. I hope everything works out okay.

gg

[wi_fighter]

GG, but how can he take in all the information when her own mother isn't allowed to say anything, when her dad takes her to the appointment and talks to the doctor?

[wi_fighter]

Oh, I remember he told me "It might not even be ADD. It could be something else." And what if it is? Is he going to deny that diagnosis too? What if the doc says her lack of motivation and attention is due to depression? Is he just going to say "no meds. She can just force herself to not be depressed." ?

[gardenergirl]

I agree, I think that's unfortunate. I guess I am just viewing this from my own filter. If it were me doing the testing, I would ask your ex why you are not involved. (I know you are!) But I would make efforts to include you before coming up with a diagnosis. Perhaps this one will, too? Or if not, as long as the neuropsych is experienced in ADHD testing, your daughter's challenges should show up in testing. Even distractibility can show up.

(((shirley)))

gg

[wi_fighter]

The doctor just called. He said she's borderline ADD and a medical challenge. He said if a lawyer asked, he would have to say she "possibly" has ADD, not probably or likely, but "possibly." I KNEW the ex was taking her to get the diagnosis overturned for court purposes.

He said she scored really high on the anxiety testing, though, and should be seen in counseling and maybe treated for anxiety.

Shirley, will the ex_____________ go along with counseling? or will he see that as another thing that he can hold his breath on and stomp his feet, and not do???? i'm sorry he is such a _____.

[mrb020377]

does this mean she wont be taking medication anymore? I just don't see how he thinks that he is doing what is best for her...... to me it looks like a setback!

[Dolfin]

Shirley,

Your ex is a piece of work. Using your daughter for personal gain against you in court. There should be a law...

If she does well with the meds, why mess a good thing up? And maybe she scored high on the anxiety aspect because she didn't know about the appointment?

I know of a barn where they will put your ex up at...they specialize in donkeys (keeping it clean, but you know what I mean).

Dolfin

[MacD]

Mandy...where the heck are YOUR parental rights...god knows you have a contribution to make......fight baby fight....love grace

[jmo531]

I am so sorry about this. Why does he think because this DR said "Possible" that is the end all be all conclusion. I have to say it, I have too. Your x is a BUTT LICK!!!

I am so sorry you have to deal with all that. Hugs to you.

Jen

[Dolfin]

LMAO jmo....butt lick


Dolfin

[jmo531]

First thing that came to mind, Doflin LOL .