[hoping4best]

I have already posted about a guy on whom i have a huge crush and he knows that but still humiliates me whenever he gets a chance,or else ignores me completely.

[hoping4best]

You have given me lots of suggestion to let go. So im ready to let go. And im trying really hard. But it really hurts when i see him talking to and having fun with another girl who is his very gud friend (might also be gf). Please tell me how do i control my emotions when they r together.

[notz]

((((((((jiakhan))))))))

[Rhiannonsmoon]

Hello jaikhan,

Take deep breaths and focus on something else. Take yourself to a safe place where you can rest and think of something else.

It really is a matter of first making the decision to not allow yourself to be bothered and then putting into place something that you know will take your mind off what you are seeing and concentrate on something else. Please remember that what will be will be and acceptance really does make a difference. So once you have finally decided to let go and you do let go, you will find that it really gets easier day by day,

Thinking of you and knowing you can do it,

Rhiannon

[Joe_Ramzi]

If someone tried to humiliate you, then absolutely he doesn't deserve your emotions. He even doesn't deserve thinking about him. So, let go and accept it. I am sure that one day you will find a better person... Keep the positive attitude.

[hoping4best]

Rhainnon, my mind registers all the minor details about him when he is around. And when he is NOT around everything just goes black for me. I LIKE to be around him. I so want to talk to him, to be his friend atleast.

[hoping4best]

I even tried to be friendly to the girl who is his friend,in hope of getting near to him myself, but it didnt work. Apparantly he has told the girl about me that i like him. im so messed up.

[bridgie]

I'm sorry but I think at this point you are only contributing to your own unhappiness and feelings of being messed up. You already know he won't treat you well(he humiliates you.) I don't understand the obsession with being with a man that knowingly purposely hurts me. you already know he does not want to be your friend(he doesn't talk to you or add you as a friend on facebook) you know these things. I think He has made it quite clear his intentions. You've even already done the whole I'm not gonna look at him or worry about him. Keep that focus and frame of mind. It seems you are not happy pursuing someone that isn't interested. Why keep making youself miserable. I feel a little harsh and I don't like to be. Yet its up to you whether you want to keep putting yourself into situations that make you feel bad. Stand up for your own emotional health. We all need to do that. Making a consious effort to do what we need to do to get better.

[hoping4best]

So that makes me a psychopath,doesnt it? for being trying to be with him when i know already that he is not there for me.

[lynn P.]

Originally Posted by jiakhan

So that makes me a psychopath,doesnt it? for being trying to be with him when i know already that he is not there for me.

No you're not a psychopath at all and I don't think that's what Bridgie or others are saying. You might be addicted to this guy - idea of being together but you can get through this. It's not easy being rejected when you like someone.

If he's humiliated you, then he's not a good person to be around. I don't think he can be your friend either. The best thing to do is avoid him completely including looking at him on Facebook or anything else. Yes it's painful but you'll gradually forget about him. If it was the other way around and you didn't like a guy who was interested. Would you want him to continue to initiate contact with you? You deserve someone who anxious to be with you and can return your feelings.

[barleysmile]

Your focus is on him. Wanting to be near him, be his friend, etc. What about you? What about your feelings? Don't you deserve to be loved? Treated with respect? Ofcourse you do! Your focus should be on learning to respect yourself, care about yourself. If you did, you would accept that he doesn't want to be with you. There are men out there who are perfect for you and will love you in a healthy way. Why should this guy take precidence over them? If you cared about yourself, you'd want to be around people who also care for you. By allowing his behavior, your saying you agree with his assessment of you. This is why it's so important to learn to love the self. You attract healthy love when you love yourself first. Sounds to me like you're a very loving person. You want someone you can give your love to. Find someone who will appreciate it. Step one, don't be where he is.

Be cool

[hoping4best]

Barleysmile, i think it would have been a lot easier for me if i wouldnt have to see his face EVERYDAY. We r in the same university, so you see the problem? I get to see him wid that other girl daily

[hoping4best]

Yes Lynn P, i wouldnt like someone to contact me if i didnt like him. Thanks for being compassionate,i really appreciate that. Yes it hurts to know that im not wanted by the guy the i like,it hurts even more when he smirks at me while he is standing wid that other girl. He does that sometime.

[bridgie]

Jaikhan..I don't like seeing women get hurt by guys that are intentionally hurting them. This is you he is hurting. I don't feel it is right. I am a woman and I am a mother. It saddens me to know that you are going through this. There are steps to take so you don't have to feel bad don't have to feel messed up. Don't deserve those things. That's why it is now up to you to take the necessary steps to keep you happy and safe

[lynn P.]

If he's smirking at you, then it would bother him more if you don't even look at him. The best thing you can do is look completely normal, even happy. You don't want to give him the satisfaction of you pining over him. As the saying goes "the best revenge is living well". God probably spared you from being with him because he's a shallow uncaring person. He's not worth all this mental energy.