[LittleForgetMeNot]

Yesterday, my childhood friend asked me if I would have sex with him. We're not going out, I never thought of him this way, and we're 15. I was so shocked, and it didn't help that he had freaked me out for over a half an hour by acting in a manner that was most unlike him.. But I was really terrified at the thought - I started trembling and I burst into tears.. It was as if he had threatened my life.

Of course I told him no, and I stopped talking to him.. But for most kids my age this type of situation seems to be an everyday thing, oh it's just sex.. I have a friend who I know if I told him, he would have told me to just go for it because it's really not that big of a deal.. But for me.. it made me cry. I don't know why.. I don't know how to explain how it made me feel really or why I reacted that way.. Anyone else I'm sure would have gotten mad.. I don't understand why it terrifies me so or why I have to be so unlike everybody else..

[Elysium]

(((((LittleForgetMeNot)))))

I applaud you for not betraying yourself and/or your values. There are some folks out there who have difficulty being true to themselves and society does not make it any easier.

I'd also like to offer you a thinking challenge. You stated in your post that you often wonder why sex (or the idea of it) terrifies you and why you have to be so unlike everybody else. You wrote "Anyone else I am sure would have gotten mad." Something to think on.....MANY people use the emotion of anger (sub-consciously) as a cover for hurt, sadness, disgust, shame, and guilt. Anger has been called (in some programs of thought) a secondary emotion which serves to protect the person who is hurting or experiencing discomfort from feeling that pain/discomfort. Sooooo....I'm not so sure that you're NOT like everybody else. I think a lot more people feel like crying but might utilize anger as their cover-up.

Just wanted to offer that as something for your mind to gnaw on for a bit. (((((HUGS)))))

[madisgram]

good for you, lil'forgetmenot! you stood your ground. peer pressure is difficult at times but you said NO! be proud of yourself and please don't cry. i think you were awesome. there's a lot of time in your life for having sex. when the right guy comes around later in your life will be the right time. i think you cried because you were disrepected. you are healthy, wise and a strong person for what you did.

[LittleForgetMeNot]

Originally Posted by madisgram

good for you, lil'forgetmenot! you stood your ground. peer pressure is difficult at times but you said NO! be proud of yourself and please don't cry. i think you were awesome. there's a lot of time in your life for having sex. when the right guy comes around later in your life will be the right time. i think you cried because you were disrepected. you are healthy, wise and a strong person for what you did.

Luckily peer pressure has never been something I had a problem with. I think it might have been because of that too.. and I have a history of bursting into tears from shock. I suppose I thought that because we had known each other since we were 8 years old and we were friends he would be different than, say, some guy I met on the bus or someone I met at school last year.

[madisgram]

i'm sure you know this-at a certain benchmark guys become blinded with their sexuality...don't think it ever ends even when they're old, lol. i do think you were shocked too. didn't see it coming 'cause you'd been friends so long. welcome to the growing up world. you just keep being yourself. i didn't bend to peer prssure either and it helped me become a woman with her own mind.