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#1
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What I Want:
Go to counseling so we can discuss this in front if an impartial person. For us to do something together. Come up with a couple physical activities for us to do together. (To exclude the motorcycle and running together because we both don't like eachothers hobbies both). We need to talk about your medication/anxiety with a psychologist or a psychiatrist to see how this plays into our marriage. That's where a marriage therapist may come into play and an individual therapist for yourself. I am happy but I am not happy in our marriage and it is on the road to divorce. We are growing apart. I can't keep living this way. |
#2
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Therapy sounds like the first step. That is what I would want to try! I wish you the best in a bad situation.
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#3
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I agree. Sending you positive energy. Follow your heart and instincts.
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#4
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Thank you gma and like
![]() We had a discussion. I told him all the things I wrote in my post. In addition we are growing into different directions and our marriage is on the road to divorce. His response: He's again sorry for the way he acted the other night (how he talked to me). He said that I mentioned before that I wanted him to help out by maybe cooking once a week or perhaps we could cook one meal together (he's now willing to participate - before he would give me the excuse that I'm a stay at home mom so I should be doing all the cooking etc... - i of course told him he would have to eat whether he was married to me or not ![]() About therapy: He will not go to a therapist as he doesn't see the reason to. He thinks that we can just communicate and we don't need another person in the picture to discuss things. I asked him if what he's telling me is I need to then see an attorney? I am not happy and it's the big picture not what happend a week ago. He gave me all the reasons why we have a good relationship and the things he's going to do so we don't need to talk to a therapist: he helps around the house, with the kids etc... he's been supportive of me being in therapy and exercise. He also said that he understood when I went to therapy for myself and improved myself that I may not want to be with him anymore. He told me he's the same person but I have changed not only physically but mentally in a good way (I'm not obese for the first time in my life, ran a half marathon recently and I'm going back to school in January for a new career that involves helping others). In short after he told me he wouldn't go to therapy: I told him we will give it a month and revist this topic to see how we both feel. In my mind: If things don't improve then that's it. I will not take his 'changing' as a way to put the stop on therapy if things really don't change. He needs to do some serious work or I'M DONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Being divorced would suck as we have young children but I feel like I'm a strong person now and I can not only survive but thrive. Finances would be tough but I would be happy. I of course do not want to go down the road of divorce but if things don't change then I have no other choice. I will not go on living with a 'roommate' for a husband. Thanks for listening!
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"Be careful how you speak to your children. One day it will become their inner voice." - Peggy O'Mara Don't ever mistake MY SILENCE for ignorance, MY CALMNESS for acceptance, MY KINDNESS for weakness. - unknown |
#5
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Hello, geez. I hope things get sorted in the best interests of all.
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![]() geez
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#6
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Update: I just shared this in another thread but I'll update here.......
He told me he doesn't want to lose me. He will go to therapy with me. I just have to pick a therapist, date and time and he will be there. He wants me to be happy and he's been towing the line with his behaviours. I feel like I'm with the man I married. I have hope. :-)
__________________
"Be careful how you speak to your children. One day it will become their inner voice." - Peggy O'Mara Don't ever mistake MY SILENCE for ignorance, MY CALMNESS for acceptance, MY KINDNESS for weakness. - unknown |
#7
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Update: marriage therapy is going great! While nothing is perfect I feel emotionally safe for the first time in a very long time.
__________________
"Be careful how you speak to your children. One day it will become their inner voice." - Peggy O'Mara Don't ever mistake MY SILENCE for ignorance, MY CALMNESS for acceptance, MY KINDNESS for weakness. - unknown |
#8
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Hello, geez. Good to hear.
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