What next...?

More updates:
I spoke to my BF that I need more space. I said that I will give him more space too and will respect his wishes, but he should respect mine too. He lashed out saying we can breakup but I was calm throughout. Finally he has promised to try on the condition that I never speak to my aforementioned best friends. I refused to do so but he has reluctantly agreed.

I have said that I will end things the moment he crosses another line and he agreed to it.

Is it possible for him to change - can I believe him if he does? Or should I just run away ASAP?

Caught in a trap again. My BF blocked out my friends and has forbidden me to talk to any of my close friends, and in turn he said that he'll be good to me. He says that he is sacrificing his life for me, and that I have done too many mistakes and I am impure.
I have never knowingly hurt anyone. But according to him, I am impure and shouldn't even talk to kids or go to church.
I am cut off from all channels of communication from people I trust.
I don't know how to talk and safely get myself away from my BF before it is too late I can't go to my family or involve any law. I need to somehow get the help from friends. He is just too unstable like a ticking bomb. I don't know what is wrong with him

Isolation from friends is a standard and dangerous practice of abusers. How could he prevent you from speaking to your friends? Does something prevent you from telling him to leave you alone and not try to see you or talk to you again?

Do not listen to what he says. He is not sacrificing his life for you, and you are not impure.

I do not have any support systems to help me out. No one. Everyone sees me as if I am isolated and they have started to isolate me themselves.
Whenever I breakup, he gets to me somehow.
How can I initiate the breakup talk and make it stick permanently with a person like him?

What about talking to those two friends you mentioned in #50?

How about taking responsibility for your actions? Break up with him and stay away from him.

Its really simple, when you stop complicating things unnecessarily.

At this point you don't even have to have a break-up talk, you've tried and failed. So just stop going to his house and stop communicating with him unless your job forces you to. Even then, communicate via email and keep it professional.

He only gets to you because you allow him to.

He's abusive in every way possible, you say you've made up your mind to leave, but you blame him for making you stay, when the truth is you choose to stay.

Your friends will support you, your parents are good people and they will be supportive and you also have this forum to support you.

How many posts and threads is this gonna take?

You know you deserve better.

So just end it already.

Do it quickly like a band aid, instead of this painfully slow method you're subjecting yourself to.

If you stay with someone that does not trust you, and who scares you you are never going to be able to breath, to relax, to actually be able to enjoy life.

You guys are not married yet. This is good. You can get out of the situation much easier, with no legal situations to deal with.

Do you feel unsafe? If you do, please get in touch with a domestic abuse program, they can assist you on getting out of the situation safely. If you think you are okay, find a family member or friend that you can stay with during this process of leaving him.

You say that he was verbally abusive in the past, but is better now? That is a red flag. People who are abusive often have a pattern of being abusive, supposedly changing their ways...but almost always go back to the abusive behavior...often with increased intensity. Don't wait around for his ugly side to reemerge. Get out.

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You are not cut off from anything, unless you allow yourself to further be subjected to his abuse. His abuse will grow, and seems to be already. He will not change, and has not changed at all.

Someone needs to love and respect and protect you, that person needs to be you.

Trippin has the rest just fine. Steer your own ship and create the life you want by taking the lead. Do you love yourself? If yes, even a little then stop allowing your precious self to be abused. When we continually allow ourselves to be subjected to abuse we become self abusers right along with them.

It's no joke, and it's nothing to play with. Women end up with no self, no sense of being, and sadly to often no life at all. There was a memorial for my dear friend yesterday morning, her husband took her life. No one saw it coming, no one knew in the last few months it had escalated to this. He wasnt physically abuse, but emotionally abusive. Two young girls are left without a mother, without a father (as he took his life with hers) family and friends are devastated and heartbroken. The daughters have been separated too.
It's unbelievably tragic and painful for the people left here to deal with it. Watching the whole thing being splashed all over our news headlines. It's more heart breaking than I can say.

I do not want to see this happen to more women and to you. I was nearly killed by my ex twice. There are numerous women here at PC that have been through the same. It's very real, and it is very serious, please treat it as such. It's not something us women should be humming and hawing about. It's not something you wait for them to change. You do the changing, and that starts by getting them out of your life. You need to be the change that you want to see.

I left by going to a women' s shelter with three small children in tow, who were 2 and a half, four, and five years old. We left with one suitcase of clothing for all four of us. No money, no family or friends. But there are options, and there is help available to you... if you want help. It is doable. We have quite a good life now, but I shiver to think what would have happened had I stayed.
I am.with a wonderful man, and have been for almost 8 years, he is also a wonderful father to my children. He is not a cheater, nor is he an abuser, not in the slightest. Why would you believe anything your bf says at all. He has proven he is not to be trusted, and his word holds no value.

Your bf is the one who is being impure, and he is threat to you and others, not the other way around. This is what abusers do, make you think the problem is you, deflect all their problems onto you. That is not love at all, it's sick and it's disgusting. It's brain washing.

What you really need is the help of yourself. Friends, family etc is great, can they keep you from him? No. Can you keep yourself from him? Yes.

Maybe go read the "will she cheat?" thread, sounds just like your bf, similarities are uncanny. I have to wonder if it is actually.

Thank u all for being so supportive. I haven't done what he has asked from me for past few days neither have I let his words get me down from doing what I wish to do.
Yes. I am mentally prepared to leave him now. 100%.
It hurts as hell but... My life will be in ruins if I were to prolong this.
I am ending this in spite of his promises that the coming days will be full of happiness. Even for the few minutes I let him contact me, he has been mentally torturing me in the name of his unconditional love...

The "Will she cheat" thread? I couldn't find it

I broke up with him and he begged to me for a last chance. He came down to the earth as low as humanly possible but I refused. I feel like such a horrible person

i think you have done a great job.. just try to be calm for few days. if you didn't do any mistakes now be as inelastic. you have your self respect right? i think he is ruining your life .. he is suspecting you in every moments right??? is it is yes sure you did correct one. no one could bring him up. he should be admitted under psychological treatment.. it is extreme way of expressing love if he didn't get his love back from his lover.. try to be calm dear... don't give him any chance sure he won't change his attitude..