Home Menu

Menu


Reply
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #1  
Old Apr 02, 2014, 06:42 PM
pleasepleasehelp pleasepleasehelp is offline
Junior Member
 
Member Since: Apr 2014
Location: florida
Posts: 6
im 23 and have been in a 4yr relationship with my gf. pretty much a roller coaster ride. she cheated on me a yr into the relationship and i took her back. for the next 2 yrs things were a little better and i was starting to trust her. i then hear from ppl and find evidence in her phone that somewhat points to her cheating again, this was about 6 months ago.
also she lived with me for the whole first 3 yrs of the realtionship and this last year she only sleeps at my house a few nights a week and i constantly worry about what she is doing.....
heres my huge dilemma, im somewhat happy when were hanging out(when were not fighting), but i feel like if i end the relationship i will NEVER find anyone else.
i have BAD anti-social problems...and its hard to tell my therapist everything thats going on

pleasepleasehelp

advertisement
  #2  
Old Apr 02, 2014, 09:50 PM
healingme4me's Avatar
healingme4me healingme4me is offline
Perpetually Pondering
Community Liaison
 
Member Since: Apr 2013
Location: New England
Posts: 46,298
Settling for someone like this, wastes years of peoples lives.

One thing, I observe that can be addressed in therapy, is the use of a judging word, as in 'have BAD anti-social problems.' The other is the use of the word NEVER, as in "NEVER find anyone else."

If speaking to the therapist is too hard, as far as, expressing what's going on in your relationship, asking to delve into those two areas might be beneficial.

No need to make any decisions, about her, until you reach a place in your heart that is one of clarity.
Thanks for this!
LaborIntensive
  #3  
Old Apr 02, 2014, 10:42 PM
pleasepleasehelp pleasepleasehelp is offline
Junior Member
 
Member Since: Apr 2014
Location: florida
Posts: 6
man i tell u this relationship is a crazy one...sometimes i believe whitout a doubt she is cheating on me, but then when i see her we talk and it kinda seems like shes not, but i cant really tell. what am i suppose to do?
Hugs from:
trying2survive
  #4  
Old Apr 03, 2014, 12:21 PM
kawaiigurl1981 kawaiigurl1981 is offline
Member
 
Member Since: Mar 2014
Location: United States
Posts: 85
Do nothing for now. There is no reason to make any changes until you know for sure if she is cheating or not. If she is it will become apparent if given enough time and if she is not you can chalk it up to paranoia and move on. I agree with the previous poster you need to focus on yourself.
Thanks for this!
LaborIntensive
  #5  
Old Apr 03, 2014, 01:04 PM
trying2survive's Avatar
trying2survive trying2survive is offline
Poohbah
 
Member Since: Mar 2014
Location: northeast ohio
Posts: 1,085
Quote:
Originally Posted by pleasepleasehelp View Post
im 23 and have been in a 4yr relationship with my gf. pretty much a roller coaster ride. she cheated on me a yr into the relationship and i took her back. for the next 2 yrs things were a little better and i was starting to trust her. i then hear from ppl and find evidence in her phone that somewhat points to her cheating again, this was about 6 months ago.
also she lived with me for the whole first 3 yrs of the realtionship and this last year she only sleeps at my house a few nights a week and i constantly worry about what she is doing.....
heres my huge dilemma, im somewhat happy when were hanging out(when were not fighting), but i feel like if i end the relationship i will NEVER find anyone else.
i have BAD anti-social problems...and its hard to tell my therapist everything thats going on

pleasepleasehelp
the next time she comes over you might want to sit her down and express your feelings and fears, let her know you love her and explain the pain and anxiety she is causing you. you're going to want out find out how she feels about the relationship going forward and find out if you guys are on the same
page.it might be uncomfortable but at some point you are going to have to ask her if she still wants to be with you anymore ( i know that sounds terrifying..what if she says no..) but it's better that you find out the truth now so you can begin healing if she doesn't, it's only gonna be worse if it gets dragged out! good luck
__________________







I have learned that i and i alone am responsible for my happiness, most people these days are as reliable as wet toilet paper!
Reply
Views: 454

attentionThis is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.




All times are GMT -5. The time now is 08:03 AM.
Powered by vBulletin® — Copyright © 2000 - 2025, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.




 

My Support Forums

My Support Forums is the online community that was originally begun as the Psych Central Forums in 2001. It now runs as an independent self-help support group community for mental health, personality, and psychological issues and is overseen by a group of dedicated, caring volunteers from around the world.

 

Helplines and Lifelines

The material on this site is for informational purposes only, and is not a substitute for medical advice, diagnosis or treatment provided by a qualified health care provider.

Always consult your doctor or mental health professional before trying anything you read here.