Lonely and frustrated

I live in PA. I'm trying to start dating again. It's so hard around here, especially when my primary interest is women. I'm sick of being alone. I don't like the bar scene and there isn't much else around here but bars.

I know I'm young and there are plenty of fish in the sea, but that doesn't help my pain of being so lonely. That just makes me feel worse. I hear that...and I hear people tell me to go back to being with men. The truth is I'm terrified of men and they don't turn me on.

I'm trying to meet people on the net, but all they want to do is have cybersex...no real talking to get to know me. It's so frustrating. I guess I'm just a little too old fashioned. Anybody would be ok if they were interested in me, not what I could do for them. I could just scream!

Try one of the online dating services where you have to pay (eg matchmaker) instead of the free versions (like AOL)...there tend to be better picks and less loosers on the sites where you have to pay.

<font color=blue> "Is it any wonder that my mind's on fire, in prisioned by the thought of what to do? Is it any wonder that my joke's a laugh, and the joke's on you." Blue Oyster Cult </font color=blue>

I agree with Thelema. Try Match.com or e-harmony. Dating is tough as HE##. Are you in rural PA or somewhere like Philly or Pitt?

I'm in rural PA. A town called Oil City. Unfortunately I don't have the money to spend on dating. Right now I'm trying Tickle.com.

I don't really agree with online dating personally, even though i've never done it just scares me. You never really know who you are getting on those.

The only thing you can do is go out and socialize, you don't have to always be at the bar to do that, there's other places you can go..

Maybe a friend can hook you up with someone , and see how that works out, if not then there is no rush, everything happens for a reason, in time you will meet someone.....everyone does.

<font color=red>~Sundance~</font color=red>

<font color=blue>"Never react emotionally to criticism. Analyze yourself to determine whether it is justified. If it is, correct yourself. Otherwise, go on about your business."</font color=blue>

<font color=black>Norman Vincent Peale</font color=black>

I disagree to an extent about your thoughts on online dating - it's how I met my fiance! (ok, ok, so I'm biased ). I do agree that it pays very well to be extremely, extremely careful - but who's to say that its not a good way to meet someone compatible?

Also, if you live in a small town (I speak from experience) there may not be anything TO do but drink or drugs, and not a whole lot of people think that's fun. Also, there tends to be a decided lack of activities and you have to admit that after awhile hanging out at your friend's house gets boring.

As for friends hooking you up? Almost impossible in a small town to find someone you didn't grow up with. Who wants to date someone that's like their sister?


some of it's magic
some of it's tragic
but i had a good life all the way......
~jimmy buffett

I've never tried it, so I don't know..

I'm sure there is sucess stories..

If it will work then by all means do it...

<font color=red>~Sundance~</font color=red>

<font color=blue>"Never react emotionally to criticism. Analyze yourself to determine whether it is justified. If it is, correct yourself. Otherwise, go on about your business."</font color=blue>

<font color=black>Norman Vincent Peale</font color=black>

Hey there {{{{{{Anna}}}}}!!!

How cool meeting your fiance like that? My best friend is flying to Toronto next Wednesday to meet her online love. We are in Nova Scotia so I think it is awesome that she is flying 1700 miles to meet him.

How did you are you bf meet? I am up for a romantic story tonight can't you tell?


Heather

Heather,

It was actually pretty funny - I wasn't using the dating service because I wanted to date - I just wanted to see what kind of goobers were putting themselves out for sale on the 'net, so to speak. It was 5am, I was up early doing some physiology homework (this was the fall semester of my senior year in college - we've been together for a year and a half now) and so I said the hell with the homework - I'll procrastinate.

Well, I searched in the general area around the university and up came this other guy (judging by his profile, he was doing it out of procrastination as well) who was at a nearby university. His musical tastes were right along mine (old school punk and all good rock) so I emailed him to say "hey, someone who actually knows what punk is and doesn't confuse it with Good Charlotte! Huzzah!" Also, he was insanely handsome. Think tall, short spiky blond hair, huge bright blue eyes and a giant grin...mmm....ok, back to the point.

I kinda forgot about it, went to class, and thought no more about it until 4 days later when someone emailed me back who's name I didn't recognize. We traded emails for a bit, he called me about a week later, we bs'd for 4 hours and then decided to meet at a small show at a popular coffee shop in the area.

Definitely love at first sight - we couldn't stop talking and laughing at all and we've been absolutely inseparable since that day - he really is my best friend. We are getting married in just about a year, so the planning is just now starting to get into full swing and lord does it have me busy already!

I'm so incredibly happy, though - I love him more and more every day (even when he's sick, cranky and demanding - he's kind of adorable when he's got the sniffles). I can definitely see us on rocking chairs with our shotguns yelling at whippersnappers in 60 years.

<a href='http://www.smileycentral.com/?partner=ZSzeb008' target='_blank'>[/url]

some of it's magic
some of it's tragic
but i had a good life all the way......
~jimmy buffett

Awww {{{{{{{{{{Anna}}}}}}}}}}

What a sweet way to meet.....and he sounds like a perfect match for you.

I am so happy for both of you!



Heather

Hey Lexicon,

Well,

First, I think you should not worry about being attracted to women.

It's a side you need to explore, no jugment intended. This is part of life.

Now, besides this, I would say you look to me as if you want absolutely to enter into a relation with someone.

Anyhow, when it comes, it comes, there's no need to rush things.

My opinion,

Take care Lexicon,

Starbuck


Born in 1963 of French mom and Canadian dad. Studied a lot (Majors in History, Theology, M.A. in Sociology). Jobless for now. Just been diagnosed Borderline.

I wonder where it will go from here... But I'll try nonetheless.

lonlely and frustrated, in re to thelmas quote from ble oyster cult. there is anothr cult lyric you shoud hear , I AM A VETERAN OF A THOUSAND PSHYCIC WARS. the games and wars we play with our selves are the most devistating. to be direct, our sufferage is our own doing. take heart , you are the only living structure like yourself you are unique in every detail. there are no other you. remember how wonderful you are.andhow you have made it this far with mostly your own desire to do so. you are forgetting that you are a pro at this life. your answers are already in you.