[Blackrose]

hey everybody,

I just feel bad about the idea of me rejecting everybody, especially those who tries to get close to me. I guess I don't to be hurt anymore but I don't want to reject anybody anymore. I want others to be in my life. The thing is, I don't know how to stop this bad habit.

I am just posting just to release my concern that I am having now. You don't need to give advice, I just wanted to share this feeling that I am currently having.

Thanx for having the time to read this.

[Direction]

Thanks for sharing...

[sabby]

(((((((((((blackrose)))))))))))))

[Perna]

Blackrose, do you have a therapist? I use to push people away without wanting to and seeing a therapist helped me a lot with that.

[Blackrose]

Yeah, i do have a therapist but I feel impatient about feeling better.

[Direction]

I think you will find that a common theme here - impatience - gosh that doesn't even begin to describe what I feel...GRRRRRRRRRR

(((((((((((((((((hugs i hear you too)))))))))))))))))))

rejection and abandonment trigger me badly. i use to push people as far as i could knowing they'd go in the end anyway, like testing them which is horrible. i think it is all about trust at the end if the day, hope this makes sense, sorry.

jinny xoxoxoxo good luck if you do seek help.

love, jinnyann xoxoxoxoxoxo

[estrellabonita]

i have that same problem really bad.

i get mad over stupid things and when my boyfriend is ready to go or i kick him out, i run after him as soon as he walks out the door and i'm all "wait wait wait! i was just kidding come back!"

it won't take much more for me to push him completely out of my life, i'm afraid.

you'll trust people when you're ready. i think the more you try forcing yourself into being a person capable of sincerely trusting others, the more you'll doubt yourself and your relationships anyway, and it'll take longer to get the results you want. and i think it also makes it harder to trust as time goes on also.

that's how i am anyway.