[continuosly blue]

It seems like we both speak different languages. It's always been that way and I never realized it until it was too late. We needed couples therapy badly but she wouldn't go. She was either ignorant or not open minded enough. Could never have a real discussion of the issue. Always ended in anger and hurt feelings. The emotion also killed any chance of understanding. She would never share and I shared too much. Without communication there is nothing.

[Skeezyks]

Maintaining relationships is tough under the best of circumstances. When there is no communication, or one-sided communication, it's pretty-much hopeless.

booth need to try to be on the same page

[healingme4me]

Some people just have one track thinking and aren't able to be flexible for compromise. Communication involves the ability to compromise. Takes two willing participants.

[continuosly blue]

Originally Posted by rcat

booth need to try to be on the same page

I told that to her and you know what she said ? " We're no even in the same library "
I can't begin to tell you how hurt I was.

[IceCreamKid]

I have highlighted what you have written and maybe it will help:

Originally Posted by continuosly blue

It seems like we both speak different languages. It's always been that way and I never realized it until it was too late. We needed couples therapy badly but she wouldn't go. She was either ignorant or not open minded enough. Could never have a real discussion of the issue. Always ended in anger and hurt feelings. The emotion also killed any chance of understanding. She would never share and I shared too much. Without communication there is nothing.

A lot of absolutes here. Your significant other may be feeling overwhelmed or left out of the relationship? Why don't you go for counseling yourself? It may be that when she sees you go, she will want to go, too.

[continuosly blue]

Originally Posted by IceCreamKid

I have highlighted what you have written and maybe it will help:



A lot of absolutes here. Your significant other may be feeling overwhelmed or left out of the relationship? Why don't you go for counseling yourself? It may be that when she sees you go, she will want to go, too.

Thanks for your input but it's really the opposite of what you think.
I know I speak in absolutes but in no way should you take it literally. It's just the way I speak. But one of the reasons in this case is because many of the absolutes of which I speak are almost true ! You are correct about one thing and that is that she was overwhelmed ,but by the many times I have tried to get her to go to couples therapy WITH me.
She's just one of those people that " never want to talk about it " , or just won't say anything which infuriates me. Hence the ' Communication Breakdown ".
P.S. I'm the one who has been left out of the relationship for a long time.

[IceCreamKid]

Originally Posted by continuosly blue

Thanks for your input but it's really the opposite of what you think.
I know I speak in absolutes but in no way should you take it literally. It's just the way I speak. But one of the reasons in this case is because many of the absolutes of which I speak are almost true ! You are correct about one thing and that is that she was overwhelmed ,but by the many times I have tried to get her to go to couples therapy WITH me.
She's just one of those people that " never want to talk about it " , or just won't say anything which infuriates me. Hence the ' Communication Breakdown ".
P.S. I'm the one who has been left out of the relationship for a long time.

Counseling for yourself will help you.