What would you do ? [ Really need help cant afford T ]

What ?

Why are you everywhere she is On Line? Living Vicariously through her?

That whole she's the air you breath gets frighteningly dangerous whether external or internal.

My suggestion would be cutting back on the net time, phone time...pick up a book. Take a walk. Put a timer on everytime you do go online....

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I understand healing , what you are saying its true ..

I guess I was feeling so lonely before she came up .. and now that she gave me some attention I got infatuated ..

I need to deal with it somehow

I managed not to text her the whole day .
She did not text.
If she wont text me tomorrow either , I plan to send a hey how are you message and leave it at that

Good decision not to text. Switch focus on something else. Good job!!!!

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So I decided to text her today , I asked " Hey how are you " .. I dont plan to talk with her or text her too much , I just dont want to act like she aint existing anymore ...

Other than that I am learning for my exam tomorrow hope ill get 5/10 the passing grade ... cause I started learning quite late

so she replied back after some time ... she asked how im doing back .. said that i am studying ..

after that we both kept the messages short and after few phrases we both started studying again .

I asked if everything else is okay and she said ...we will talk some other time about it

back ... today was **** fuking **** really really ****

I did not pass my exam which made me feel like a worthless piece of **** .. and of course I did not take it when I don`t think I studied even 1 hour in total for it ..

What pissed me off is that I asked a so called friend .. for help .. Told him to keep me a sit near him for the exam so he can help me out he said ok ..

And when I got into the room I had no place to sit .. but yeah its not his fault that I failed my exam but yeah " friends "

Saw the girl today and I got the feeling that she ignored me a little but towards the end we exchanged looks and talked a little so ...

On other news
I am the point of a nervous breakdown , almost cried when my mother asked how the exam went

So today is **** really really **** .. I took 2 sleeping pills hope they kick in soon

I am so very sorry. You need to see your doctor.

Your friend isn't responsible for helping you on the test, more so in the US you can be kicked out from college for getting help from others.

It's tough but failing exams isn't the end of the world. My nephew flunked the whole first year of college and now has engineering degree and high end engineering job making tons of money, he just wasn't emotionally ready for college

Please tell your mother how much you are struggling and please see your doctor. I hope you get better soon

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those 2 sleeping pills did not kick in ..... i havent slept the whole night last night ...

I know he isn`t responsible to help me .. thats why I said its not his fault .. but when you ask someone for help and he says yes and then betrays you , it kinda sux ...

I remember in my 1st college I did an entire paper for someone , I did 2 papers in 1 hour ..cause that was not his strong subject ...

Thats why I am so upset