why did he act in such weird way,was it my fault?!

I Guess with how the whole situation went down, I broke up with my boyfriend of 3 years, I could not stand his uncertain behavior. on friday February 24th, he came for his graduation, and he had messaged me the Thursday before, saying that on Friday he was coming early here to town where I live, because he was closing and giving the keys back, of the student apartment that he has here where I live.(Around a week before all of this, he had said"''listen what are we going to do for next friday for my graduation, you want us to see eachother before,u wanna go there or what? and I said after would be cool, but I told him to text me the thursday before the graduation so he cann confirm plans. he told me that in reality he just wanted to get it over with the graduation,and get his Diploma.)


So it was thursday and he messaged me''Tomorrow i'm coming early because I need to give the apartment,close it down'', and I text him back on Thursday asking him, ” so what are we going to do tomorrow when you come? and he replied ”I will see your early on around 10:00 am”. So I replied ”OK you text me when you arrive”. I even found it weird that he did not begin the message saying ”Hi—, he just went directly for it.

In my mind I understood that he wanted to have sex, before closing the apt, so I assumed that’s why he wanted to see me early as well. Before he closed the apartment. I had also been preparing myself mentally for a breakup for some reason, I just did all these assumptions that basically brainwashed me to a point where I believed them,,I was also very very indecisive whether I wanted to go out on friday with him or not!!.

So it was Friday morning, his grad was scheduled to start 4:00 pm in the afternoon, and I assumed we were going to see each other AFTER the grad (I guess not) .

At 11:26 AM, he text me saying ”I’m here”, then seconds after, he calls me and says: I’m here in the town, I just arrived, are you ready? Or you need more time and I said ”no am not ready, I need time” and he said ”OK in half an hour then (in his terms its like an hour, he is always a little late LOL) I said OK and hung up. I decided to go, I got ready,dressed up,put some makeup. But the point is that 15-20 minutes after he called me and we had spoken, I texted him after saying ”we should see each other better in the evening” (I, wanted to see what he was going to answer and if it was cool with him or not) and after that I never got a message response back from him.

Time was passing, and it was 1:30 PM already, I got angry so I took my clothes off and put my pajama back on. Then almost at 2:00 PM I text again saying: ”you know what forget it, don’t come, stop wasting my time, you are late”.

And got nothing back from him, I know it was his grad and he was not going to ruin it for him. But he should of acted differently. He just disappeared no message, no call. nothing just rude.

I forgot to mention that after his grad, maybe in a month and a half later he is leaving back to the states. And we had not talked seriously about our future in a clear manner. So I don’t know what made him act this way this past friday?!! I have 3 theories #1- he got mad that when he called I was not ready, #2-what really triggered him was that after he called me saying that he was here, 20 mins after I text him saying''we should see eachother better in the afternoon'' #3-He did it on purpose for some ulterior motive. what do you think?

Sounds like the love connection has been fading overtime, even he was aware of it. Otherwise he'd keep messaging you, yet it seems he wanted to meet up with you for the sake of staying committed.

How much were you connected heart-to-heart? What I mean is, how much did you settle and talk about emotionally intimate subjects and know what is going on with your lives?
I'm not making any bold conclusion, but it kinda sounds like you weren't really close on an emotional level and more on a sexual level. But three years is quite some time, so I really can't judge. But this is what I sense from your post.

@Vibrating Obsidian,Hi there, Not really I actually wanted to have a serious relationship with him, but his medical studies, were just time consuming and Also this man happened to have Undiagnosed ADHD, I believe this is the reason the relationship could not last longer I, was suffocating and it was sucking me dry, I felt like I was with a man child, HONESTLY I could not understand his odd behavior, I really don't know how complex is ADHD in an undiagnosed level. But I can tell you something, In my life I have never had such a weird relationship.

My mom even told me that she found it really weird that he acted in such way especially him being 37 years old and dissapeared,,, especially us two being 3 years together and he just acted like.

Hmm, did it ever even enter your mind after a 3 year relationship and how much effort he put into his education (medical studies are HARD), that you could have gone to his graduation so he could have someone there who was "proud" of him? Did you ever show any excitement about the fact that he "finished and was receiving a diploma?".

YES, ADHD is a challenge, especially when it comes to learning and getting a degree. Maybe he wanted sex, and maybe he wanted "more" than that.