Cyber Stalking: The Online Threat

Is she stalking you on online forums or other online venues or FB? Could you block her? Or ask moderators to block her? Is this the type of setting where you can’t block or unfriend or ignore people? Since she isn’t stalking you in real life, I’d think you’d be able to block her?

Why cant you block, unfriend, ignore, everything possible to stop seeing her & her being able to contact you instead of RECORDING everything she does? I am not following this logic. Ehen someone bithers me, I block & keep them out of my life I dont record their activities because that sucks me into whst they are doing instead of distanciing.

Well, one member did chime in about his stalking behaviors and what goes through his mind, etc. And how he tries to combat it. I try to have compassion for everyone, even people who have obsessive behaviors like this. At the same time, I cannot read another person's mind or know that they are harmless or not, so I will still protect myself and keep myself safe.

I'm sorry you find this entire thread triggering. Honestly everyone could be triggered by any thread in this subforum because we are all talking about relationships and communication with other people and anyone could identify with the OTHER person rather than the OP in this forum. But we are here to give support to the OP and others who have experienced what it's like to be violated by stalking.

I wonder how many people have come close to stalking at various points in their lives but do not choose to share it even anonymously for fear they'de be villified. I mus thave missed that single person you mention...
of course everyone should protect themselves from stalkers because you never know how far it might go.

You're correct that any thread can be found triggering by someone but that doesn't mean that person can't say they find it triggering either. There is always the villified 'other'.

You know, not for nothing, this is from the community guidelines:

"Pedophiles, rapists, and others that have abused another individual physically, psychologically, emotionally or sexually (generally real or acted-upon) are not welcome here because our focus is on support for victims of such abuse; the two are not compatible with one another. Exceptions can be made on a case-by-case basis."

I would think that stalkers qualify under abusers. I frankly don't care if someone who has abused me can get emotional support or not. That's not my concern. If someone on this forum needs support for obsessive thinking about someone, I'm all about helping them handle their intrusive thoughts, but I'm not going to condone or pretend to condone abusive behavior.

This thread is about the damage that being stalked has done to us. If you want to start a thread about dealing with obsessive thoughts related to stalking then maybe that's what you should do, instead of coming on here and challenging people who have been the victims of this abuse.

Seesaw

Wow, sorry to hear that Buffy. I think the good thing to remember is that social media and online groups are totally optional and we can be as anonymous as we want. You can change your user name to something no one will ever recognize, you can change details/names/places of your story so you can get support without people having to know who you are.

Seesaw

You know, not for nothing, this is from the community guidelines:

"Pedophiles, rapists, and others that have abused another individual physically, psychologically, emotionally or sexually (generally real or acted-upon) are not welcome here because our focus is on support for victims of such abuse; the two are not compatible with one another. Exceptions can be made on a case-by-case basis."

I would think that stalkers qualify under abusers. I frankly don't care if someone who has abused me can get emotional support or not. That's not my concern. If someone on this forum needs support for obsessive thinking about someone, I'm all about helping them handle their intrusive thoughts, but I'm not going to condone or pretend to condone abusive behavior.

This thread is about the damage that being stalked has done to us. If you want to start a thread about dealing with obsessive thoughts related to stalking then maybe that's what you should do, instead of coming on here and challenging people who have been the victims of this abuse.

Seesaw

Artchic, people who turn into stalkers on the web are typically lonely and dysfunctional people who try to target others in a negative way so they can feel like they have some kind of power and they try to find ways to get their target to feel bad about themselves. These kind of individuals were often neglected as children and this neglect made them angry so they began learning to gain attention in unhealthy ways. They often pick targets that remind them of the parent that neglected them too. They are individuals who don't take rejection well so when they are blocked and not engaged they tend to look for ways to still get at the individual who is choosing to reject them. It's also not unusual for these kind of individuals to try to find others who will join in with their effort to pursue and challenge the individual they are trying to target. Their identity revolves around taking away the identity of others. This is an effort to make up for how their parent or someone in their own life failed to help them form their OWN identity and develop healthy "self" respect.

One of the bad things about this Cyber technology is that it has become an effective tool toxic individuals can use to hurt others. Even the creators of Facebook have admitted that the use of the likes and dislikes when it comes to whatever a person posts on Facebook is actually unhealthy for a persons mental health. Studies have shown this to be true. The truth is that just because something is new and popular doesn't mean it's something healthy and "safe". Actually, the individuals that create and put out all this technology make it a point to limit their own children from being exposed to it and instead choose to have their own children educated the old fashioned way without the help of this technology.

That being said, the computer technology we do have can also be a source that someone can find helpful and look for information that provides that person with ways to learn and gain personal knowledge. It's always important to remember that when it comes to engaging on any kind of social site that you can most definitely come across other individuals who use these sites in unhealthy ways.

The problem is that thebterm stalker is losely defined & what may seem luke a stalker to one may not seem like it to someone else.

Some because of their mental condition don't even get it that what they are doing is coming across as stalking to others. We actually had a thread like that hers on PC.....definitelf NOT a sociopath. Generalized labels are not ALWAYS appropriate even if they fit many times