Not belonging anywhere

Do you ever have the feeling that you don't belong anywhere? Not even to your own family? That you are so different from anyone else in your environment that you can really not connect yourself deeply with other people aroung you?
I had that stupid feeling many times... the more I get older the more often I have it. It causes pain...

Yes, I often feel the same way I'm sorry

I hear ya doll! not a day goes by that I don’t contemplate about whether my mother was abducted by aliens. Or I was switched at birth in the hospital.

The human journey can be a lonely one at times. We each have our own path to walk. I frequently feel like I don’t “fit in.” Maybe I don’t? Now that that I’m in my 60s I’ve kind of given up and accepted that fact that, yeah, I’m unique. There’s no one like me. But there no one like anyone else either.

If it’s troubling you maybe try therapy? (Disclaimer: im not a Doctor) I am going to mention that maybe you are mildly depressed. When I’m feeling really estranged from other people and feeling weird or lonely...it’s usually because I’m going through the depression phase of my bipolar disorder. I try to remind myself that these feelings are a symptom and not “reality.” That helps me...it may not help you. But I’m sure you can find something to works for you if you keep trying.

I felt like that when I was trying to find a place to fit in. Then a time came where I stopped caring. I let all my crazy loose and somehow I found my people. So many people don't fit in and those are my favorite people.

I felt that groeing up in my family but I worked hard to be nothing like them also. My mom said she was sure they gave her the wrong baby in the hospital. My dad had problemd connecting eith anyone & my mom had zero self confidence or esteem. I was active in school, performing music, student government school clubs & excelled in my classes & I had an internal drive that my parents had no concept of. Though because my parents didn't connect to people I was kinda that way too. I didn't have a group of friends I fit in with...i was sort of on the outskirts of many groups...so the not fitting in was a feeling I got often.

Now it has just become a nirmal part of life (age 65) because I still have so many activities I am involved with with so many diffèrent groups if people. At first I still didn't feel comfortsble until I learned how to emotionally connect with the people in every grouo I am with....that has been a new learning process the last 10 years of my life once I was completely away from the people who had been in my life

I used to feel like that well into my early adult life. It's something I've contemplated much since my mom passed and as I've grown in motherhood as my sons have grown. This thought process began as I take them to their pediatric appointments. I'd ask myself why I let them answer before rushing in, to answer for themselves. Why have I often been so quiet and shy? My mom, even into my adult years would answer for me. Why didn't I feel as a member of my maternal family or as close for many years? I felt overshadowed, hence like "not belonging."

I don't feel as much like that, anymore. I do "hear" what you are saying. Shared my thought process in hopes that it gives some food for thought as you process your own feelings.

I believe your approach is contructive

I had a a tone of activities and I could find many more to join groups. But the fact is that I don't like modern - Hollywood style lifestyle that most people follow nowdays. So even though I can be with people, I would still not fit in.

Been that way my whole life and I am just now accepting it.
It is to me a part of a sentence or punishment from which I believe there is no escape. I'm speaking for myself though.
You may still have a chance to break free of it but, I can tell you now that it wont be easy. I wish you luck though.

That is why I never fit in when I lived 54 years un Los Angeles county. Now I live in a small town of 8000. My activities are working with rescued horses in local abuse cases, helping with 4-H Trail riding, volunteer work at the horse park on the fliral decoration crew for their huge horse shows. Also lead Bible study group, go trail riding myself....& heaven knows, keeping my farm going by myself is a full time job.

I am total country & loving it beyond what I ever thought. Everyone is so down to earth & there is almost no one I can't connect with now. It is an amazing feel. Something I always craved but never could find or experience in the big city. I was meant to be a country person & sensed it from about the age of 5. Just couldn't do anything about it until I was 54 given the choices I made with career & marriage. Nice to have finally found my freedom

Of course I do. Considering that I left home when I was 16 and lived in seven different countries since then, I have not felt as if I belong to any country, religion, culture and/or my family or roots. Even before the age of 16, going back to my childhood, I distinctly recall feeling as an outsider among my friends and loved ones.

Wow! That is great! I am happy for you

Oh well, chaging environments so often, not fitting in is someking of expectable..

That is not entirely correct because as I indicated in my original response that I was feeling out of place since I was a child. Having moved to many places made it worse. Besides there are lots of people who have lived in multiple countries yet they still have a sense of home, a sense of religion and culture. Having moved doesn’t necessarily mean every single person will feel out of place.

Oh... OK, got it... sorry...

I'm not at all close to my family; I haven't seen my mother since I was 15, only just met my father and half sisters 7 years ago, and don't see other family but once a year, if that. I also feel that way at my job, and in other social situations. I think I always have. As other posters have said, I think I'm starting to learn to accept it.

I've been hoping someone would mention this. Thank you.
My husband died almost five years ago. No sympathy, please; he was not a good man. I was homeless a year later and chose to go to a
small town less than a hundred miles away because of a certain hospital. Yet it is in a different but adjacent state.
Talk about not fitting in. The attitude, morals and educational standards make it seem as if I traveled two centuries in the past. The women are
passive, the men mysoginistic and disrespectful and I have been physically threatened for turning down invitations. I have always had
friends, until moving here. Lived all over this country but this place is...
I can't even find a word. Scary.
And the hospital? They prescribed a class two narcotic for my DID that
nearly killed me. And my doctor? When she said I have to learn to
'control' my dissociative disorder, I felt my heart sink. It's so scary to know you must entrust your care to people who don't know what they
are doing.
Sorry if I am ranting. But I don't belong here. And I don't know where
the money will come from to move. Freedom is only seventy miles away. And a hospital with docs who specialize in my disorder. But my
destiny, though rocky at times, will offer a solution. I just have to be
patient and trust that the world is unfolding as it should.
The funny thing is, I am healing and doing it on my own through study,
meditation and keeping the stress down. And never going out without
my pepper spray.
Thanks for listening. I feel better just getting it out.

I wish a better future to come for you...

Thank you Lady for your kind thoughts.