Not liking my mother

Ever since I could remember I have not liked my mom. Even as a small child. I feel generally indifferent towards her and I don’t know why. Nothing horrible happened as a small child that I can remember. I know there’s some sort of psychological based explanation for why this is, but I don’t really know what it may be. Help.

It may have something to do with your OCD. Some children that have certain challenges are much harder to sooth. So the mother's touch is not calming to them as would be for the average infant/child.

Possibly. Seems reasonable, but I feel like this would also apply to my dad if it was true. But I don’t have any problems with my dad. We get along completely fine. It’s just her and I don’t know what it is.

We can love people and not like them.

Perhaps your father has OCD too. And his behaviors align with yours better. OCD is often inherited.

It can also be that a mother has the OCD challenge which can contribute to your struggling more with how it affects you.

@Ihav

My guess is that counseling could really help you to dig into the reasons you feel this way towards your mother. As an ordinary layperson knowing basically nothing about you or your relationship to your mother, it's very difficult to determine a possible cause for your indifference, though what you're feeling is by no means rare, going by what I know.

All the best. Keep reaching out on PC if you think it may help.

I have never loved my mother. she was an abuser. she knew better. how ever she too was abused in her life so it is complicated. as she aged I became her sole care provider, which sucked. big time.

how ever, from my mother I learned how to fight, a skill which I use to this day. I also learned to love to read and love history. that's about it.

I am perfectly fine with my feeling's towards her. she was evil and mean. I grew strong in mind, soul and body regardless of what she and father did. in the end I had to totally distance myself from her to begin my healing process. that hurt much but it was the only way. I regret that but there was no choice. again, she knew better, she made choices that were wrong in her upbringing of her children. f

from her I made decisions about my life...that I would never treat children as I was treated, and that I would never bear children. I love kids but none of my own. I will be the best and strongest aunt kids have ever had..or if I see a child abused I will fight for them. but that's it.

just because someone is your mother does not mean you must love them/

Maybe it's less about what she did (while growing up) and more to do with what she didn't or couldn't do?