Is this unreasonable

Nov 07, 2022 at 04:45 AM

I'm at work and told friend I cannot respond to emails until I finish work, got notifications on phone that she's sent me several emails -after I told her that I can't respond to emails until I have finished work

I can get onto emails on my phone, but if I respond to her email messages while I'm working, she will just send more than she does if I don't respond until I can after work

Is it unreasonable that I don't respond at all to her while I'm working?

OafFish · Nov 07, 2022 at 05:43 AM

It's absolutely reasonable not to answer until you're ready. If your friend has been told already, then they must expect you to wait until you're available

divine1966 · Nov 07, 2022 at 05:57 AM

You aren’t obligated to respond to anything not work related while at work. Emails isn’t anything warranting immediate response. I don’t think your friend shouldn’t email you, you just don’t have to respond until later

Rive. · Nov 07, 2022 at 12:44 PM

Your friend has to learn to respect your / other people's boundaries!

You already informed her you can't check emails. So, if she decides to still keep sending emails, it's on her. You don't have to respond to her at all.

livestrong232 · Nov 07, 2022 at 01:12 PM

Of course not, you are totally within your rights to not answer during work. A very healthy boundary. If your friend continues to intrude after telling her you are not available, you may need to pull back from the friendship

divine1966 · Nov 07, 2022 at 06:53 PM

I don’t think sending emails at random times is intruding. People get to them when they can. It’s not the same as texts. I never pay attention what exact time email arrived. I respond when I can or when I check it.,

Nov 10, 2022 at 02:12 AM

She doesn't have my mobile number, partly cause I can't respond to international texts, but also I am worried she will flood me with texts, even when I need to be asleep

mote.of.soul · Nov 10, 2022 at 02:55 AM

No, it's totally fine to reply to emails after work, even though your friend sent them during your working hours, like the other comments above said. You've told her you can't reply until after work, so she's probably not expecting you to reply until after work. It's okay.

Discombobulated · Nov 10, 2022 at 07:40 AM

Maybe it’d be helpful to look at your phone settings and mute her? I think it’s possible to do this just for one person, or at least mute all alerts while you’re busy.

Nov 10, 2022 at 04:36 PM

so apparently her boyfriend has a family emergency, and she thinks she should be his priority above the emergency .........

Nov 11, 2022 at 03:38 AM

As I thought, I'm apparently the "bad guy" now for pointing out emergency takes priority .....

She's being like "I'm tired of this I'm tired of that" seems she thinks I'm invalidating her by pointing out emergencies take priority

.....

Rastana · Nov 18, 2022 at 02:28 PM

Sounds like this person causes more harm than good in your life. May be a good time to reconsider the friendship.

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Is this unreasonable

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OafFish Poohbah Member Since Jul 2022 Location: The Far West Posts: 1,234 1	Nov 07, 2022 at 05:43 AM #2 It's absolutely reasonable not to answer until you're ready. If your friend has been told already, then they must expect you to wait until you're available
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divine1966 Legendary Wise Elder Member Since Dec 2014 Location: US Posts: 22,473 (SuperPoster!) 9 1,279 hugs given	Nov 07, 2022 at 05:57 AM #3 You aren’t obligated to respond to anything not work related while at work. Emails isn’t anything warranting immediate response. I don’t think your friend shouldn’t email you, you just don’t have to respond until later
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Rive. Magnate Member Since Sep 2013 Posts: 2,018 10	Nov 07, 2022 at 12:44 PM #4 Your friend has to learn to respect your / other people's boundaries! You already informed her you can't check emails. So, if she decides to still keep sending emails, it's on her. You don't have to respond to her at all.
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livestrong232 Junior Member Member Since Nov 2022 Location: Ottawa Posts: 14 1 7 hugs given	Nov 07, 2022 at 01:12 PM #5 Of course not, you are totally within your rights to not answer during work. A very healthy boundary. If your friend continues to intrude after telling her you are not available, you may need to pull back from the friendship
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divine1966 Legendary Wise Elder Member Since Dec 2014 Location: US Posts: 22,473 (SuperPoster!) 9 1,279 hugs given	Nov 07, 2022 at 06:53 PM #6 I don’t think sending emails at random times is intruding. People get to them when they can. It’s not the same as texts. I never pay attention what exact time email arrived. I respond when I can or when I check it.,
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Anonymous32448 Guest Posts: n/a	Nov 10, 2022 at 02:12 AM #7 She doesn't have my mobile number, partly cause I can't respond to international texts, but also I am worried she will flood me with texts, even when I need to be asleep
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Discombobulated Grand Magnate Member Since Oct 2019 Location: UK Posts: 4,747 (SuperPoster!) 4 11.8k hugs given	Nov 10, 2022 at 07:40 AM #9 Maybe it’d be helpful to look at your phone settings and mute her? I think it’s possible to do this just for one person, or at least mute all alerts while you’re busy.
	Reply With Quote

Anonymous32448 Guest Posts: n/a	Nov 10, 2022 at 04:36 PM #10 so apparently her boyfriend has a family emergency, and she thinks she should be his priority above the emergency .........
	Reply With Quote

Anonymous32448 Guest Posts: n/a	Nov 11, 2022 at 03:38 AM #11 As I thought, I'm apparently the "bad guy" now for pointing out emergency takes priority ..... She's being like "I'm tired of this I'm tired of that" seems she thinks I'm invalidating her by pointing out emergencies take priority .....
	Reply With Quote

Rastana Member Member Since Oct 2022 Location: Colorado Posts: 33 1 27 hugs given	Nov 18, 2022 at 02:28 PM #12 Sounds like this person causes more harm than good in your life. May be a good time to reconsider the friendship.
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