How to rebuild and recollect myself?

I am not sure if due to the status of numb or frustration, I found the inner status is struggling in between the loneliness and want to have connection but fear of getting deeply hurt at the same time. And not knowing when these could be gone.

I have difficulties in dealing these by myself and sadly it is what I am facing now. People around me said that is the consequence that I started the cause.

How do you process and go through these kind of struggle and even though I know it might be a period of time, and I found it is tough to stay in a healthy diet and maintain calmness emotion.

What would you do when these chaos that spinning in your daily life?

I just read an article that suggests you go out in nature. Ground yourself by taking off your shoes and standing on the grass. Going for sensory walks where you notice nature around you, how the air feels, the sun on your eye lids, what you hear. If you live in a city find a park. Even just sitting outside can help. These things can ground you and help you deal with the relationship stuff.

Why don't you direct your focus to very small, safe, fleeting connections with people? Smile at the barista, say an extra thank you to the refer nce librarian... Those kind of things. Such connections can be deeply gratifying and the danger of getting hurt, almost non-existent.

Once you master these, you can proceed to deeper engagements with other people.