Love affair with therapist please help :(

I have tears in my eyes reading your story.... what an incredible journey you've been on. I have utter admiration for you and was so pleased to read that you got out of it. Me unfortunately... well, I havent. Not fully anyway. I dont think i will say anymore on my situation as it is very very painful. BUT you're story has given me hope... and I thank you for that

I can relate to how you feel about your T. I also had an afair with my T and it really messed with my head, after the wonder of it all wore off it left me feeling dirty. He also admitted that I wasn't the first person he has had a relationship with (He is married)
When I look back at it all I wish I had listen to people telling me how badly it will affect me, it will also affect all future relationships with other counsellors, it builds boundaries and walls in your heart.
Most people who study psychology do have a past with issues of some kind and I think that's why it happens so often... It might feel good now, but you will regret it someday and if you are married it will make you see your husband differently and you might come to resent him for not giving you what you want/need. Is this relationship really worth all the complications?

Pix

Quite simply, no it's not worth all the complications... I know that, but still... I feel like a puppet... its me controlling the strings (or so it seems) but I still cant give him up.

I know this was an ongoing, long drawn out issue in the past. I am bringing it back up now with the hope that you will support me again. I am with a new T who is female and knows all about my "thing" with old T, who I no longer see at work. Although we've had our final "session", we have both agreed to meet out side of work for coffee. My new T knows everything other than where he's from and he's name. She has promised me that even if she did now she wouldnt say anything (as much as I see it angers her)

I've tried txting her when I feel like txting him and have tried to think of all the problems it has caused me but I am struggling still to let go. i am seeing my new t every week and I think she is wonderful. She told me we would get through this together. I just wish I had found her sooner.

ty for reading

Hi allme. Long time no see. I am glad you have found a new female T and that you feel safe to share your issues with her about your old T. What a smart idea... texting her when you want to text him. You will get there allme. Weekly visits suggests you are serious and she is on your side until you get through this.

Hey SS ))))) Yes it has been a while .... If my memory serves me correctly, I was on bit of a high the last time we had contact. Well as you may well see, that has surely come to an end I like the high me .... at least I get things done and I can be very productive as well as pro-active.

Thanks for the reply and your ongoing support through this situation You truly have been there every step of the way and have been the only one to stay with me on this. I really appreciate your support I just wish I had friends like you in R/L. Non judgemental and unconditional support. Thank you! I hope I can support you in the same way some day

I wonder what makes some people so vulnerable men in power positions and therapists? I ask because I have had two male T's and I a male doctor and it seems that I developed feelings for them. If this is not the case for you and it is only the one, sorry for assuming otherwise, like I said, I was just wondering...

I'm glad you are with a female T, but I can understand that you miss him and that it's different. I wish you the best of luck with your therapy and that you will get past the feelings for your old T.

HI there Pixie.... Yes I can say it is the same for me. There is a part of me that wants to be controlled and loved by them in the past. From teachers (from school days), doctors and now T.

I well think my issues are due to "daddy" issues

Hi, AllMe; nice to see you here.........You meeting outside? How does that work? My friend is having a terrible time; hasn't seen her t (since he kicked her to the curb 4 months ago).........Can't believe I have been with my t for SEVEN years.....I can't afford him much longer. One day I may just tell him about himself.

Thinking of you....Hugs n Love, Sharon

P.S. I am sure I have "DaddY" issues, too. I never knew him; met him when I ws 30.