[-Astral-]

The voices are telling me that i must die and apart of me agrees with them and another part of me don't

I am looking into starting an open uni course in may but i have never done anything like this before also it will be from home so i dont have to go out of the house to do the course and i can do it in my own time ( well with in reason )

The voices are saying that i cant do it that am useless and i am too thick for this kinda thing with i agree with them in away

I mean am not as bright as other people who are doing this course
i have no other qualifications apart from the stuff i did in school and that's about it

I have no self esteem as i always put myself down and give myself a hard time

The voices want me to die and i think i should i dont have a reason to be in this world i don't help anyone i just take and take from people
My husband is my carer and i make him do everything around the house because i either cant do it for myself or i don't have to motivation to do it.
Am so useless and am nothing
everyone would be better off if i was dead
I just feel so low right now and the voices arent helping things at all

Ella

Originally Posted by XSeleneX

The voices are telling me that i must die and apart of me agrees with them and another part of me don't

I am looking into starting an open uni course in may but i have never done anything like this before also it will be from home so i dont have to go out of the house to do the course and i can do it in my own time ( well with in reason )

The voices are saying that i cant do it that am useless and i am too thick for this kinda thing with i agree with them in away

I mean am not as bright as other people who are doing this course
i have no other qualifications apart from the stuff i did in school and that's about it

I have no self esteem as i always put myself down and give myself a hard time

The voices want me to die and i think i should i dont have a reason to be in this world i don't help anyone i just take and take from people
My husband is my carer and i make him do everything around the house because i either cant do it for myself or i don't have to motivation to do it.
Am so useless and am nothing
everyone would be better off if i was dead
I just feel so low right now and the voices arent helping things at all

Ella

Please, please don't. Do anything, but just don't harm yourself. Talk to someone, you are not useless or nothing, and people would be devastated if you died. You are a beautiful person and the voices are evil, please do not listen to them. Please realise that you are not a bad person, you have an illness and people want you to get better, they don't want you to die. You are such a brave and courageous person, you are an inspiration, and you can't let the voices win. Is there anything you can do to distract yourself? Speak to anyone? If you are feeling suicidal, please call the suicide hotline or 911/999 (depending if you live in the US or UK). You mustn't give up the fight! Everyone believes in you!

You can message me if you want someone to talk to

Sending hugs your way, I am on your side

~ WTTJ

[Shadowvixen777]

I know how you feel Sweetie. My voices tell me things like that all the time. I know it makes depression and negative feelings harder to deal with. It sucks. But I've been convinced that what the voices say are the opposite of truth even though sometimes I can't see that. It's so true, they are liars. Their job in life is to screw with our brains. You can do anything you want to do. Don't give up.

I must ask, are you on any antipsychotic meds? And are they helping control your symptoms at all? If not you may want to talk to your doc about this. He can help quiet the voices and make you feel better. Just remember in the meantime that they are liars and that you are worth it. I don't even know you and I love you and want you to live. The voices have no true power over you. They may seem overwhelming but in the end they are nothing more than voices. Please just continue to fight this and try because you are worth it and you can do anything if you just try.

[-Astral-]

thank you both
am on anti psychotics the dose-age was changed just 2 weeks ago and so far they haven't really done anything ...so am waiting for them to start working i see my dr on the 24th of February and my psych on the 29th of February .
told my husband what was going on and he now knows how am feeling took a Valium last night and went to bed but i cant keep taking them every night because there addictive .
i can call the crisis team at any time but i don't want to keep calling them when its not an emergency .
I will talk to my dr about this when i see her ...
Ella

[missmorganxo]

Aw i'm so sorry this is happening to you!
I had times where I've heard voices telling me I should just die and stuff, and part of me wanted to...and it's an awful feeling. It's awful to feel like you're useless to your husband, or whatever. And better off not around. i feel the exact same way. Like I'm a burden. The only thing that keeps me from comitting suicide is my religion. And that is just barely keeping me from doing.

I'm on anti-pyschotics too and they have helped, alot. I had a bad episode where I thought I was at the beach and saw palm trees in my bath tub two nights ago. It was a good hallucination, but my family is concerned.

I know how hard and isolating this can feel, and I hope you feel better.

I've been thinking about you Ella. You are a good person and I'm glad you have Andrew. Tell the voices, "go away." peace...