[newtus]

i dont want to see a psychiatrist anymore...

but i need my disability

but
my life right now is spent waiting waiting waiting to lower a med dose or let him to get me off it. what do i do with my life for the rest of my life? have it pass me by wiating for med changes? and even if i asked someone that they tell me to goto school or get a job but if there are so many alt routes in life why cant i take them? and what are these alt routes?

if i dont goto school or dont get a job - then no one has anything to say to me? why?

[avlady]

Please continue to see a doc and t if possible, you may feel stable, that is when we know we're getting better, but sometimes don't realize it in ourselves because we feel better thinking we don't need the doc and meds. I know what you're going through about school and a job, my son was just diagnosed with social anxiety disorder and his college days he didn't live up to the grades he was supposed to get. he ended up in the hospital, put on meds and seems to be doing ok, but because of transportation problems, he was in 3 accidents so far, and lost his car, girlfriend and job because of drinking alcholol, we are up in the air not knowing what to do next. I need help here too!!Good luck

[newtus]

funny thng is is i dont feel stable. maybe stable enough.

this medicine is taking away everything from me. my creativity. my personality.
all cuz this medicine.

im not better off going off it but i wish i could. i dont think i have a choice though. i have to be on it.

[lil-angel-wings]

Originally Posted by newtus

funny thng is is i dont feel stable. maybe stable enough.

this medicine is taking away everything from me. my creativity. my personality.
all cuz this medicine.

im not better off going off it but i wish i could. i dont think i have a choice though. i have to be on it.

This is how I was when I was on Geodon. I was flat. I had no desire to do anything cause it took away a part of my creativity and desires. I hated it, but it was at the time the only med that I was some what stable on. I am on a different one now and not flat like before, but I have no desire to be creative or do much of anything. I have thought of getting a part time job again, but I know that I would be back in the hospital or feeling like I had lost my mind under the stress of a job. So I to sit and wait as the days pass me by wondering what life holds next.

[newtus]

thats exactly what im talking about lil angel wings.
thats exactly what im talking about...

[Atypical_Disaster]

if i dont goto school or dont get a job - then no one has anything to say to me? why?

Because people are ****ing stupid. They don't want to hear that some people actually can't do things like that. They don't want to live in a world where not everyone can do things like that "if only they would work hard enough".

funny thng is is i dont feel stable. maybe stable enough.

this medicine is taking away everything from me. my creativity. my personality.
all cuz this medicine.

im not better off going off it but i wish i could. i dont think i have a choice though. i have to be on it.

I know exactly how this feels. Medication can have its benefits but you're right, in my experience too it's just taken away my creativity and my personality and just made me flat. It doesn't do much for my "positive" symptoms either, it helps some but not enough for the side effects to be worth it. It seems like medication makes my "negative" symptoms more pronounced. Or maybe I just notice it more on the meds? I don't know, but either way it's rough going and I'm sorry you're dealing with this.

I think I have a doctor'a appointment this week but I don't have the card and I don't want to find out anyway I don't want to go. I have a psych appointment at the end of the month I don't want that either. I feel FINE I don't want anyone to investigate me or interrogate me or pump me full of drugs just leave me alone.