Roll Call Twelve

im ok today

Hazy lazy and crazy here. There. Then again. Stop it right there! Take your degree and shove it. Shove it where? Guessing games galore! A love of shopping and mopping floors. The haze has set in and it's not going anywhere anytime soon. Medication station hatred and love all mixed in. It's got to be tough to live as a musician. I picked the wrong occupation. I have none and nothing to say. Play and days pass before me without meaning and hearing everything they said repeated and heated discussions will continue until morale improves. Improvements are for the government. Watching me and hoping I die lie cry sigh high tides and low tea time ever have tea? It tastes wonderful. I can't tell you how wonderful Alice in wonderland can hate my soul and take its toll on me and you there. Yes you. Hate that's great take it all away today make me lie to die to cry to sigh to drown in high tides drowning.

I feel like you often reference the tides atypical. Is the sea or the moon special to you?
Thanks for sharing this. I'm sorry it sounds like a challenging day.

remember when i said when i think im doing ok i found out im not?

my family has been saying ive been preoccupied lately

I'm doing good Gr3tta, thanks for asking! Am enjoying spending time with my family. Went to see fireworks Friday, went for a walk in the sun yesterday with the dogs, and met my brother and family for coffee today. Family time is precious.

How are you?

Atypical & Newtus

*Willow*

That sounds like a great weekend willow! So glad to hear it! Was it a holiday on your side of the pond that prompted the fireworks?
I had kind of a rough one yesterday but todays been all right. I gave one of my dogs - my biggest and hairiest- a bath. ( he had an upset tummy that necessitated it, 'nuff said! ) Because he is older and has arthritis, and also is too large for me to hold up too long, I ran him an actual bath. He laid in the water with his chin propped on the tub edge. I let him soak for a bit, then lifted as needed to get alll of him washed, conditioned, then got him rinsed with the shower head. He seemed happy as a clam!
Now he is extra fluffy and soft. He's not a fan of being brushed so I just keep swiping at him quickly as he goes by. I am a dog brush ninja.

On 5th November it is Bonfire Night to remember Guy Fawkes' attempt to blow up Parliament so we always have fireworks and most places have a bonfire with a stuffed 'Guy' to put on top. Since the 5th was a week day, most events are the weekend before or after. When I was a kid, some kids would make their Guy a few weeks before and ask people "penny for the Guy" to get some money, presumably to spend on sweets, but I haven't seen that for years now. Guys are usually just clothes stuffed with straw with a stuffed cloth bag for the head with drawn on features.

Lol at "dog brush ninja" My Mum has to be the same with her dog, but Max is more than happy to be brushed as long as periodically he gets a treat. He doesn't mind the bath either but doesn't like the hair dryer at home (though the Groomer's one is fine), but my Mums' bishon loves being brushed under the heat of the hair dryer after a bath.

Sorry you had a bad day yesterday, but glad today was better

*Willow*

Oh Guy Fawkes bonfires! I know of them but had forgotten! Thanks for reminding me.

It is, I'm just not sure what the connection is. But it does matter. A lot.

Hey all! Many hugs to those of you who are having it rough right now. Many prayers going your way. My weekend has been very busy and productive. I got over a week's worth of lesson planning done for school and lots of other needed paperwork done. Got some cleaning and laundry done and have enjoyed spending some snuggle time with Daisy. Finally finished for the day and am going to turn on some Netflix and relax. My brain has been so "in gear" this weekend. When that happens I use that time wisely and get everything done that I can for school because other days it can be a huge struggle. I wish weekends were longer!

my dads been drinking a lot lately.

it makes me have episodes when he does. cuz it causes me stress.

I'm sorry Newtus! Many hugs and prayers coming your way! Hang in there!

it scares me

I totally understand. Been there done that.

now im drinking :/

Not good

idk what happened :/

Why do I always get hyper at bedtime? So annoying! I hyperprepared for tomorrow so if I ever get to sleep I can sleep until the last possible second.

Same thing here! Hopefully I'll fall asleep soon!

im awake cuz my dads making noise and cant sleep so now i cant

now im having bad thoughts for som reason.
having visuals of telling my mother to go burn and die in hell and scalding her face with coffee.

i havent had violent visuals in a long time. but i am right now.

i have been doing fine for about a week or so until last night. when my dad started drinking.

edit//
now im getting thoughts that arent my own
and having flashbacks of the hospital.
i get a lot of flashbacks about the hosptal.

a few days of being ok means NOTHING when u always have trouble anyway

i got 3 hours of sleep last night with the voices and visuals

I'm so irritated right now. Over the weekend I got a letter cancelling my appointment with my new psychiatrist and a call confirming my appointment with my old psychiatrist that was supposed to be cancelled. I can't get either department on the line to change the appointments. What if I were actually sick---I hate dealing with people and this is making me not focused on my work because I'm waiting for a stupid call. It just makes me want to cry.

isnt it more about dealing with the system?

Hi everyone. I'm sort of around but I don't have a lot of energy but just wanted to say hi and let you know I'm thinking of all of you.