Roll Call Twelve

Kureha: Wow that video is very disturbing! The police here in Dallas have been killing people lately. Instead of shooting them in the leg they shoot to kill. It has been in the news quite a bit. It's extremely sad!

It's the alcohol! Beer makes you gain weight!

Investigation continues into fatal police shooting
http://kdfw.m0bl.net/r/1q2p10

2nd Dallas officer punished in mentally ill man's shooting
http://kdfw.m0bl.net/r/1q09b2

Two Dallas PD officers fired
http://kdfw.m0bl.net/r/1q0epg

but i drink a few sips??? just til i get buzzed.

i think i know what it is

the hand-to-mouth cig thing. always needing to put something in my mouth. oral fixation. i think i figured it out.

I guess it depends on how many sips your taking and how often. But it's really true- beer does make you gain weight.
The cigs might make you eat more too and maybe you just aren't realizing it.
120 pounds is not fat though! For your height that's a normal weight range.

Kureha I think you can see from the articles I posted that the Dallas Police Department are very corrupt!
I certainly do not trust them!

Thanks for the links cracking, I'll check them soon.

your right it does. but i dont think i drink enough (or do i) to gain weight from beer.

i need tl get to 105 again

the cigs are making me eat more i think

i saw those links. well heard about them on the news. im happy for the outcome kinda for them to get arrested

i just learned my dad DOES only have a few thousand in his savings

and i have a few hundred

which confirmed my wondering our financial status

Be thankful. You have more than some people. I don't have any savings and I live pay check to pay check.

i am thankful

im used ti this by now
after all these years

but i grew up upper middle class
thinkin id be in a high ranking position
with a high degree

and im not
im poor

i had higher expectations for myself but they fell through CUZ MY ILLNESS

im mostly over it but in 1 way still mourning growing up good AND having a family

...going on expensive trips all the time

cali...nevada...the south...the hill country of texas...resorts...

...gettig literally hundreds of things for christmas

...but i didnt like my family it wasnt stable

but still it wasnt about the STUFF so no ONE make me out to be something im not

its about mourning a bit the COMFORTABLE life

i just got off work. so one of the customer service managers came up to me near the end of my shift and said that a customer complained about me. he said i didnt talk to him. i realized that i hadnt been greeting people because i get so focused on my work. she said i need to smile and greet them. i felt embarrassed. i have to talk to every customer from now on. also i find it hard to carry on a conversation with them. i feel uncomfortable when they say something out of the normal hey how are u. i just nod or say yes, maybe im just being shy. ive always been a little shy to strangers. it just irks me that a customer would complain about me but i guess people want to talk to the cashier. honestly im not there to be social i just want to get money and work. but its part of the job to be friendly. i had problems with this at my previous jobs at grocery stores. i quit because of it once. a customer complained about me not being "cheery enough". i was like this is ridiculous and walked out on the spot.

now every1 will thinking im complaining about my life sorry

I don't think you're complaining. It's not complaining to honestly discuss your life and how you're feeling. It's normal, and healthy.

thank you atypical

i wanna be this skinny

I don't like her arms

i love her everything. just want to be that skinny thats all.
her arms are great. and her legs are to die for.

That type of skinny is NOT healthy. That's the type of skinny that the media pushes onto girls and women these days. That's why there are so many girls and women out there with eating disorders. It is very sad

Let me also add that my oldest daughter is 19 years old. She is 5 foot 4 inches tall and she weighs 92 pounds! She has a mental disorder about food. Textures of food freak her out and she hates to eat. She went into an eating disorder hospital for a month when she was younger. I attended therapy and classes with her and learned a lot about all types of eating disorders.

i see

im not trying to have an eating disorder or anything like that but i NEED to be that skinny. i feel like i have to be. i know what everyone is sayin here but im still too fat to myself. 120 or even 115 or 110 is not what i want to be its too big.