Roll Call Twelve

My cat is doing pretty good. We made her a make shift kennel so she won't try to climb anything since she has stitches. She is very sleepy from her pain meds and I've been designing her new room layout. I'm very excited and I hope she really likes it.

Interesting question.

People must have got their ideas from observing nature and other cultures. They would have also experimented to improve their tools, weapons, etc...

Technology (like knowledge) advances on the previous work of others.

Still really scared and the crisis team aren't helping, see their Dr tomorrow.
I'm going to die and no one believes me.

Coming to see me again today, they just called.

Thinking of you KUREHA.....

Kureha

I'm feeling very lonely today, even though I've been surrounded by people all day

*Willow*

imgoing to the hospital

I hope you will be okay newtus

Crisis team think I'm faking.

Newtus Hope you're ok and don't have to stay long

Kureha What is it with MH services assuming that everyone is faking??! Unfortunately I can relate and I know how much it sucks to open up to someone and have them not believe you

*Willow*

Well the Dr came he believed me
He said he can see that I'm ill and they should be seeing me every day, but are just going to phone tomorrow unless I need to see someone.

Take care NEWTUS. Thinking of you and praying you feel better soon (((hugs)))

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My son's new friend is still struggling I guess. It's interesting to hear him talk about it. They talked for an hour last night. Well, he talked and she mostly listened. He said most of the time she wouldn't respond at all - even when he asked a direct question. She initiated the call, and they talked for an hour, so I guess she wanted the contact. He couldn't decide if she was psychotic or feeling the effects of the AP.

Anyway it was interesting to talk to him about it and hear his hesitation over the whole thing. He's always said that people should just treat him like "a normal person" when he's in psychosis, but I think this conversation made him realize how difficult that can be on several levels.

I think it was a good experience for him, because it seemed to pull him out of his own head to really notice what's going on with someone else.

He had an eventful - and stressful - week. He decided to quit his job on Tuesday, because it wasn't going well and he didn't want it to deteriorate. He applied for two peer support positions. He got in contact with his half sister (I think I mentioned how he hooked up with his brother in Nigeria; that relationship continues). He started this friendship with this woman from his class. His friend's gf hung out at his house for a couple of hours while his friend was visiting with his son who lives nearby.

A stressful week. And during a hard time of year for him. Still he seems to be holding up fairly well.

I hope things go well for you, Newtus. I hope you are treated well and you can rest and feel better.

Kureha: I'm glad your doctor believes you.

Willow: It's easier to accuse people of being attention seeking than to have to untangle everything that's going on with them. So many people think MI is fake. If you think MI is fake, you shouldn't be part of the mental healthcare network.

Costello: It sounds like your son is getting stronger and I'm really happy he's navigating his stress. It's also really good that he is helping his friend and learning from it. Sometimes it's easier to see things in other people than in ourselves.

I hope you're treated well. You will be missed.

I'm so glad your doctor believed you.

I'm sorry I haven't been on much. Been dealing with anxiety and apathy (at the same time) and all that fun stuff. Reading a book on sz that's really helpful. It was written for family members, but it's helping me realize what my symptoms are, and that I'm not just completely worthless because I'm a 'bad person' or whatever. Hopefully me and my mom can utilize the information in it. It came with a lot of worksheets and such, which looks helpful.

My boyfriend also agreed/volunteered to read it, which is a huge relief, because I don't think he really knows the extent of my symptoms, and how they at times make me seem like I don't care or such when I really, -really- do. I have pretty bad cognitive symptoms at times, so it can seem like I'm not paying attention when I'm trying really hard to.

Me and my mom aren't doing so well, but I finally know part of the reason. Due to her past experiences with addiction, she tends to see everything as a possible 'excuse', so when I tell her that I really, really can't control when I'm anxious or seeing things, or delusional, she tends to think of it as just another reason I'm giving myself not to move forward. Really I just want her to acknowledge my symptoms and help me work through them, I guess, instead of just acting like I should 'try' and therefore everything will be better.

Either I've been trying for years and it hasn't worked so far, or I haven't, and the latter makes me feel like a horrible person when I -really- want to be better. I can't fathom that I just haven't been trying or whatever. I hate my life too much for that.

What's the name of the book, coyote?

The Complete Family Guide to Schizophrenia. I'm over halfway through it now, and from what I can gather (I tend to forget things right after I read them), it's got a lot of helpful stuff. I'm reading it first due to paranoia (I've read some similar books which were good at the beginning but then became a bit...eugh) and then I think my mom is going to read it, and my boyfriend. At least I hope she reads it, because I certainly won't remember everything it says due to my memory issues.

It has an entire chapter on setting household rules and boundaries, and another on communication. Then there's a chapter each on how to deal with positive, negative, and cognitive symptoms. Also has a chapter on how to avoid relapses and how to spot the warning signs...which leads me to believe that I'm heading for one at the moment, so that chapter is going to be VERY helpful, even if we only use the worksheets in it. It also actually talks about persistent symptoms, which was very helpful for me. My persistent psychotic symptoms usually include infrequent hallucinations, -slight- delusions, and some paranoia, but after reading about sz in general from this book, I'm less worried that I was misdiagnosed, or that I'm 'faking it' or something because I'm not -constantly- having strong positive symptoms, because my negative and cognitive symptoms more than make up for that. And I -am- very good with taking my meds, so it makes sense that I wouldn't be constantly seeing things like I used to.

Sorry for the rambling, I'm just really pleased with this book. Got it for $9 at the used book store while spending time with my aunt, but it has 4.5 starts with 21 reviews on Amazon, so...lucky find!

I'm gonna have to get it.

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Mentioning something unusual I see to my wife results in her taking it as something with a very reasonable and logical explanation. This usually makes me confused and wondering if she is delusional. Until I get it. Then I am slightly amused.

(Unless I am in a bad mood, then it might piss me off, but in that case I am unlikely to have said anything in the first place)

I'm getting my car looked at by a family member on Thursday and hopefully it will be a cheap fix. I was going to rely on that car through medical school since I commute to college. Everyone is giving me grief about me spending so much money on my cat and I can't ask for money since I already recieved funds from my parents last week. At least I'm getting As in college and I'm not manic anymore

Congratulations on your A's medicalfox! That's amazing! I am glad the mania is gone too. I hope that means you feel better in spite of present worries. I am so happy for you over your collegiate success.

I do feel better and I'm very happy about the progress I have made. I got excellent grades on my pathology reports and I mostly have to work on my sociology final which isn't hard. My strattera finally kicked in and I'm getting all my work done finally

im out

i just dont know what to say...it all went to hell

i was out in 2 days
the poliec stormed my house thru my backdoor
i was put in the area with the sickest people and worst drug addicts
put in a gym with 30 beds lined up like a 3rd world country
given almost no meds except 1 time

after i got out i was taken to my appt with my nurse

WHO CALLED MY PDOC
and up my haldol to 100mg
and put my on ANOTHER antipsychotic

i was told that im very siick.
that i have a flat affect. delusions. responding to internal stimuli.
just said all that stuff and more.

...i just dont know what to say right now...