Roll Call 25

Well there are websites where you can do just that (ask people to be your friend). I remember Sometimes mentioning before that's how she met a few people. But also it's good to google groups in your area that you can join to meet people with similar interests, and then if you hit it off you can invite them for coffee or to the cinema or something.

*Willow*

The Acceptance and Commitment Therapy intro course I did said that you have to work out what your values are and then commit to working towards them, no matter what you feel. So if you decide that socialising is important and you need to do more, then you have to set your mind to doing it, even though it's hard and scary.

I decided that voluntary work was important and good for me, so I took the risk and offered to run a craft group at a local MH drop-in centre. This week I had to meet them to discuss it and I was terrified about meeting new people and worrying that they'd think I was a fraud, and I still worry about not being good enough to run the group, or that people will think my crafting abilities/creativity are rubbish, but I'm doing it anyway, and I know that it'll make me feel better about myself because I'm helping others, and doing something constructive with my days, and it gives me something to talk about when people ask what I do all day cos I don't work. Just a thought. I know it's hard though

*Willow*

It is scary, but personally I think it's better to know what they're saying about me behind my back. Up to you though. If they've taken the BPD diagnosis away and labelled you sz like they've said, it might put your mind at rest?

ETA: They should let you as it's your right to read your notes. The only exception is if they think it will distress you, which is BS in my opinion. But they will tell you how to go about getting hold of your notes (how to contact the records dept), then they will have to check them "for 3rd party data" (which is more BS!), then you pay the fee (max £50, though I only paid £10) and you get them. It took me 5 ½ months to get my notes from my hospital stay, though there is no reason why it should take that long.

*Willow*

Yeah I think I would feel better knowing so I will ask next thurs when I see my cpn. Thanks for the advice willow x

my former T told me i was borderline and so did most of the doctors in the hospital. its such a catch all diagnosis. im not borderline my T confirmed that.

why made them think you guys were bpd?

i dont even know. most teenage girls appear to be bpd but its just how teenage girls act and behave normally and then they might go to therapy and get diagnosed with it. the doctors at the hospitals prob thought i was bpd because of what happened with my former T. idk i never really got an explanation. my diagnosis is PTSD major depressive disorder and psychotic d.o nos right now

tha made me think. i dont really feel like i have major depressive disorder anymore. my depression has gotten a LOT better. in the past couple of years. i owe it to my T. well i worked hard too. i get depressed sometimes but not that much and it goes away pretty quickly. whereas i used to be depressed for months and think about killing myself every day

Newtus - sorry for it taking so long for me to check in on this and reply to this.

I don't think you messed up.

I don't think there are hidden rules.

I think that the good news is that you know Exactly what is expected of you. You might want to clarify a few things with her... like "I know I can't miss appointments, but what do I do if I am really sick?"

I don't think the rules about meds are unreasonable. And I don't think it's fair for anyone to say that the purpose of the rule is to increase it until.... whatever.

Newtus, you've been suffering for such a long time. You've been very inconsistent with medications. Since it takes time for the meds to work, you really have no way of knowing how much the meds will help you. You always stop taking them before they have a chance to really work. So I think that your therapist may be trying to help you stay on your meds. Help your life get better.

I'm proud of you for signing it. I think you should work hard to stick with it. Maybe make a commitment to yourself to abide by all of its terms for six months. If you aren't feeling better than you are now, then you can reevaluate the whole thing and see if you want to continue.

You have to give it time. At least 6 weeks.. probably more like two months.

I've been diagnosed with BPD but I don't agree with the diagnosis.

With all due respect my statement was based on Newtus's previous experience with this clinic. She was taking meds/injections for 6 months but they just kept increasing the dose despite the fact that she did not want to. If the drugs were going to work they would have...Once you are on an injection there is no way to safely decrease the dose yourself and rapid withdrawal tends to promote psychosis. The highest dose of haldol injection is 100mg....and Newtus was still symptomatic so they decided they would just ignore the dosing and give it to her multiple times a month at the full dose. Then additional APs were prescribed on top of the haldol increasing the dose further. Some people cannot become fully non-psychotic even having tried every anti-psychotic...this treatment resistant population is around 30%. If the meds are only partially effective an individual should have the right to choose when the benefits of decreased psychosis outweigh the risk of sleeping 18 hours a day and feeling suicidal. Meds are not a miracle cure for everyone...it's not always so simple as taking them consistently. However the contract puts this decision of the best dose entirely into the hands of her pdoc.

I was diagnosed with BPD at one point, even though the only symptoms that fit their criteria was the history of being abused as a child, and the fact that I at one time had an eating disorder. I was suicidal - but I brought myself in, so to them I was just attention-seeking.

They put me through a DBT program that was months long and not as helpful as CBT is for me, and then turfed me to a BPD specialist, who tested me, saw me for a month or two, and then said that I definitely wasn't BPD, I had a psychotic disorder, and she couldn't help me. She dropped me without referring me to anyone else, and I just floated through my first year of university completely psychotic until the school psychiatrist finally saw me and referred me to my current program, and I've never had a better pdoc. She deals with psychotic illnesses only.

I'm waiting for him to get off work. He's gonna meet my son and hang out here. Got apt pretty clean. He's not sure when he's getting off though.

The pretty much have to refer you or you can sue them for like I think it's called abandonment or something so that's super weird.

I'm glad you found someone good though....my pdoc was a university psychosis specialist and he also was the best...

She said she had referred me to "Community psychiatry" but I wasn't really in the right mind to chase them down, and when I finally did, they had "lost" the referral.

I'm so grateful for the pdoc I have now.

i applied to target but i dont think theyll call me back. i was just completely honest on the online form. and if they give me an interview im gonna tell them on im disability.

Alcohol is a depressant. You drink a lot of it. So although being alone so much is probably part of the problem, the alcohol is making it a whole lot worse.

I really want you to be ok Newtus. You are such a sweet, beautiful girl. It makes me so sad to see you suffer so much.

I think that's awesome....you can't win if you don't play...

Some employers actually actively assist people with disabilities...I know when I was hired where I work now there was actually a whole pack for disability and you basically had to say yes/no and tell them what you need. It was really upbeat and was like here at whatever we love helping people out so tell us what you need kind of thing...

i hope this place is accomodating :/

Keep applying places?
Do like junk said...
Tell them 20 hours or less.
punky

im actually scared to work but i need to get out of my house. my dad found a job a few months ago now im stuck in the house with nothing to do

One thing to keep in mind is hiring is really seasonal...in summer you get some places like garden/home centers actively hiring while others get an influx of kids out for summer. If things don't work out for any reason you can reapply in fall when kids go back to school or at Xmas when additional help is needed a lot of part time Xmas workers get hired on if they are good because they are already trained...

How about Starbucks? I think that would be fun...well aside from the usual percentage of moron/jerks you run into in retail...but it would be neat to know how to make that stuff at home...plus usually there is an employee discount

i overheard baristas saying you need hours of training to work there so idk if thats true or not