Roll Call.....#30

Thank you for the private responses I won't say a word. First rule is not to discuss lol.

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Haha it does, doesn't it. As soon as people try to control you it's natural to want to fight it. Then you get treat like a petulant child. No win situation. I've heard things are bad in the us I'm thankful for the systems we have in the uk especially the laws against mechanical restraints. Good god they sound like something from a horror film.

They are, I've spent time in them. Not pleasant.

Yeah so far as I can tell the goal of the psych hospital is to break you and make you compliant rather than to have any sort of informed decision take place...it's like it would take them too long to have a convo so they just call for a takedown team instead...

Immigration is complicated and sometimes being mentally Ill especially if you are unable to work would be sufficient for you to be denied entry sometimes even for the most basic travel purposes....

i got my title by going to settings and going to custom title and changing it

somehow i gained 8 pounds in a week. unbeliavble. i talked to my neighbor and she suspects its all water weight. idk. i guess. haha

Yay I did it!

Sometimes people gain weight when they first start exercising new muscles....it seems to be part of the growth building part so try to see it as a good sign...

see and I TOLD everyone i am NOT exercising if it builds muscle because thats not what i want. but maybe i should. i want to be lanky and skinny. actually everyone i talk to said i was too skinny at 105. but i dont think so. i thoughht that was the perfecct weight. they kept saying "oooh your gonna blow away" oh GOD. i wish. haha. i only hear what people TRULY think of me after ive lost or gained weight. i wonder what ill hear when ive lost this weight. when i lost 80 pounds i remember my mom saying how overweight i was. and when i was overweight she would call me fat and say demeaning stuff to me. and i could wear my dads belt and it was still too small on me. i recently tried on my dads belt and i was thankful it was too big on me. it gave me motivation.

im actually currently on a fitness forum. it doubles as a weight/food tracking app called My Fitness Pal. i use it religiously.

Yeah you can't weigh yourself multiple times a day or even once a day because it'll really send you through the loop. You eat something that's slightly salty and bam retain water and your weight goes up. You exercise and it still looks like its going up. It's best to weigh yourself once a week at the same time. Like say Saturday morning. Don't judge it day by day. Week by week is the way to go.

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If you start lifting a lot of weights and taking extra protein like a LOT yeah you'll probably gain muscle but if you just do anything cardio and a little bit of weights you won't gain muscle. Either way you're burning fat.

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Yeah you won't have obvious muscle like a guy or anything but you want muscle because it will actively burn calories even at rest thus getting rid of fat....but during the early phases of muscle building you can gain weight but it's mostly water and when you are done remodeling you will just pee it out...

remodeling?

Yeah, I'm trying to lose weight right now too and for awhile the scale said I was gaining weight but everyone's been telling me it looks like I've lost some... so I'm going with that.

So basically your body is changing is ways you can't see on the surface...as you use muscles they get stronger....they don't get bigger in women without huge Amounts of effort like actual body builder status but they sort of reinforce themselves so they are more powerful...so on a cellular level they are changing structure....at some point your fat deposits will shrink and your muscles will grow a tiny bit to fill in that space so you will look the same on the surface but if we could see inside you there would be less fat and more muscle...the beauty part of this is certain areas like the tummy are pretty much big fat deposits and they will just start shrinking but if you want a six pack that's hard to achieve....so seriously don't worry about being too muscular you will build muscle below the surface but you'll never see it just the lowere levels of fat...

Yeah some people use a measuring tape or calipers to monitor this but me I just use whether my jeans fit or not...

i actually use a meassureing tape. i measure my thighs and arms and stomach and hips and sometimes neck. i thought about doing my calves too. i log it into myfitnesspal. but i only do that about once a month or so.

oh yea and my bust.

I am hyper but I did a reality check with my hospital friends and told them about my weird thoughts and they said that's not normal and I kind of knew that's what they would say but I feel better now and less paranoid.

That's a really healthy way of dealing with things

Maybe things would be so much easier if I could just accept that I had sz rather than fighting it

Life goes a lot smoother when you just accept it. (Voice of experience talking here...)

Watched a show about Warren Jeff's last night. What a sick man.

I also watched what about Bob? It's so funny imo. My favorite part is the beginning when he's all neurotic in the pdocs office, lol.

I drank one cup of coffee, that's all I'm gonna have. Decaf tea for the rest of the day. Anybody else find that coffee interacts with their meds and makes u anxious?

muscle burns more calories than fat too. It takes more to maintain so you burn more calories throughout the day.