Roll Call 100: Centennial Edition

Ativan doesn't really do anything for me either. I take it but it doesn't do much.

She said at my therapists office she would take me to the doctor to get admitted to the hospital on Monday, now she's broken that promise.

So now I'm suicidal and alone

Awww i know!!! Eeek! AND when i styled his hair today like i did in the pic, i effing swooned over him.

Like i didnt know he could look like that

Hes actually cutting his hair for me like that cuz i liked it so much tonight and we aint even together yet!

Oh I see. How do you feel about that?

I'm pissed.

I don't want to go to the hospital, but I believe it is the best choice. While my mom goes on believing that I'm not suicidal and just being overdramatic.

What about calling your therapist and telling them what your mother said about not taking you to the hospital?

I need to try not to eat the rest of the night.

Do you take pills that make u wanna eat at night?

No, i just been eating late at night lately

Oh my gosh... The father of a childhood family friend I knew passed away today. I am shocked. He was a great guy and was passionate in what he did.

...what freaks me out about this is I have been having the thoughts again the past few weeks that someone I know was going to die again. This is the second time this has happened in the last few months. I don't know if I can be rational because I really do wonder if I have some ability to foresee these things, or cause them. It's scaring me.

Ugh im eating

I spent the whole day just laughing and laughing so hard lmfao like really really hard I've never laughed that much since forever what a good day!

I'm going back home now tomorrow from the psych ward town. Going to bed after I drink my twisted iced tea.

Also, the movie flatliners sounds awesome!!! I should have so created that movie!

Lolololololol

I would talk to her. Tell her how you feel about the hospital. Hopefully she will listen. I would call my therapist too. Maybe she'll listen to a professional. I hope you get the help you need.

Good morning. I didn't want to get up today. I can't go back to bed either. My son has a late start at school so I have to be up to get him up. Then I have to work. Maybe after I finish.
Having a good day so far. I'm feeling alright.
Hope you all have a hood day.

Morning.

Had some coffee. Got the best sleep ive gotten in a LONG time. Went to bed early. Even lost a pound. Slept like a baby!

Six degrees of separation and all that... I think that probably works for deaths too. Not that much of a coincidence to find out of someone passing away.

Morning/Afternoon

Back from college now, just one class today. Looking forward to sleeping in tomorrow as I've been up fairly early the past two days.

What's everyone up to today?

You can't cause them.
Years ago I was laying in bed trying to get my son to sleep. Suddenly I felt like I was having a stroke. I went to the hospital and it turned out to be an anxiety attack. 2 weeks later my dad died of a stroke. I still think I was able to feel it.

Just working. Later I'm going to Staples and the Paper Store.
I'm hoping to squeeze in a nap after work.

I also can tell when something is really wrong with my sister. I hate it.

Went to church yesterday, it was very nice

The walmart i goto has an option for pickup and where you shop for your groceries on the Walmart app (and pay for it), then pick up them at a selected time, bagged and ready to go. I think im gonna do that. Might solve my procrastination issue with grocery shopping these past 2 weeks.

Kmart used to do that. You could pay via paypal. I used to place small orders of household goods and pharmacy items. It worked out well.

I am so excited to be on this journey of faith. I have about 30 more classes to go to, every Wednesday night for 2 hours. So its quite a big commitment. This is something I've wanted to do for a long time though. I can't wait till Easter when I get baptized and confirmed.

How is everyone? I'm doing very well. See my therapist today then my doctor on Wednesday. Have 1 group today. Its been 90 days without bingeing or purging.

Congratulations!
I'm doing well. No voices or symptoms except the usual anxiety.