Roll Call 176

The meds I take are all free with my insurance (medicaid) except for Metformin, I just have to pay 55 cents for that lol

Esther has to stay at the vet hospital until at least 6 PM. We can check with them after that. That's when they are going to give her more insulin. They got her evened out but I guess they want to see what happens on her next dose. It's hard to be patient. I want her to be okay and I also want my kitty cat! I have to remind myself that she is in a good place (I hope--never used their services before) and that she is getting good care (again, I hope) and that she's going to be better for being there.

Ooh the store is bringing out their eggnog now! I'll have to get some. I love that stuff

I've never tried eggnog. Is it nice?

Yeah, it's really rich and sweet. Lots of people drink it with rum in it, it's good like that too but I typically just drink it without the alcohol

It's not really a thing over here. I might try n get some.

wtf. I just looked at what my psych put in for the bloodwork request sheet. On dx's it has Schizoaffective disorder Bipolar type (Which I already knew) but then it says Anorexia Nervosa: Binging/purge type I always thought my dx was bulimia. I didn't know there was a difference. Just caught me by surprise when I glanced at it.

Well regardless of that, I start the group next Friday so hopefully it's helpful.

I have to figure out where to get the bloodwork done, if I recall correctly I can get it done at my primary's office without making an appointment, but I'll have to call to make sure

If you get it be sure to post what you think of it, not everyone likes it but I think it's really good. (but I have a major sweet tooth)

Will do

Earlier today I watch my friends cousin go into seizures and other things because he took my whole bottle I got from cvs of my lamictal... all 60 of the 100 mg... he was lethargic and throwing up... shits crazy.

Why did he take your lamictal?

Hope he'll be okay Erti

He took all meds that was laying out and my lamictal was out in the open... didn’t think he’d do it.

I hate how I treat myself sometimes. I just don't know what to do. I try to be self-compassionate and stuff. But I cannot make up my mind re psychiatrist stuff.

Ah ok, hope he'll be alright

I’ve been contemplating of self harming right now..

Don't do it!

I feel like I’m gonna... calm the demons that follow me.

I can't wait until I can go to bed.

I have to get up at 4 am tomorrow... It is going to be an early day.

All I do is listen to music and browse the web all day

When I'm not sleeping

A lot of planning too.. Constant planning.

My doctor says that I should do less planning and just DO.. Cuz I basically "end up planning for planning the next day".

Poor executive functioning...

I don't know if the way I am now is better or not than how I used to be (Sleeping/drugs/chatting) because of all the criticism saying that I'm not living properly.

Cuz everyone had this time to figure out the world and have self awareness in high school. I just had anhedonia/depression/social avoidance.

And I had to do a lot of chores in isolation and work in a mechanics shop.

Frosty tonight. Leaving the window open for cool air to come in WHILST I SLEEP is nice..

Omg like 70s here, so beautiful!