Roll Call 181

No I don't have any crockpot cookbooks, but I find a lot of good recipes on Pinterest Tacos are great!

Crockpots are great though. They're so easy. You just basically put everything in and let it cook. I also have this mini/tiny crockpot that came with it that you can use to heat up chocolate and dips, stuff like that. I haven't used that one yet though

My care manager called to check on me. She's very nice. I guess she'll be here next week since she has a few patients/clients in this building and she'd gonna see me. Haven't seen her in a long time, of course she still checks up on me over the phone and texts. She asked if I had any trouble getting my stimulus and I said no, because on the IRS website where you can track your payment it says it will be deposited Wednesday the 17th. So I'm assuming that's what will happen. And I didn't have any issues getting the other 2 stimulus payments.

I didn’t know it’s very important to gesso your canvas before you paint. I usually make landscape so it’s not a problem but I’m painting a human now and I can’t get the fingers right because the surface isn’t smooth

I might see if my care manager can help me with my cleaning problem. Like if she can text me or something once in awhile to remind me to clean. They do things like that. It might be helpful to have more support. I struggle doing daily tasks

Annnd I'm dissociating/panicking again. Every day around this time, Idk why

Have you been drinking a lot of coffee or anything?

So just learned that caffeine makes my voices worse

Le caffeine -> L’anxiety -> Les Voices

Hell yeah! Found out I'm getting just over $2,000 back for my tax return.

*dances*

Yeah I drank 2 cups of coffee and a cup of black tea today. But yesterday I didn't drink anything with caffeine and it still happened, so who knows. I'm basically just trying to finish up the rest of the caffeinated stuff in my apartment so then I don't buy anymore. I can't bring myself to get rid of it for some reason.

Yeah if I have a large amount of caffeine it makes them worse for me too

I kind of want to stay up all night tonight

I don’t like my last painting But the goal is to make 150 mistakes in one year.

I keep forgetting to call my pharmacy to ask my pharmacist about the pills and pill crusher and how I'm supposed to take them when they're crushed. Will do it tomorrow

I think after I buy my new laptop with the leftover money I'm going to put it aside and save a little bit more for a couple months to add to it then get a new tattoo

I wouldn’t if I were you. Sleep is important to stability!

Yeah that’s true. I hate going to sleep though because I feel like when I’m sleeping I’m missing out on all that time to do stuff, I feel like there’s not enough time in the day.

I wish the psychiatrist would finally ****ing call me. It’s been almost a month since my doctor put in the rush reference. Like I said earlier my doc upped my lithium a bit but he doesn’t want to play around with it too much without the psychiatrist making suggestions.

I hate waiting. I’m so glad my doctor at least started me on the lithium so I can feel more stable. Who knows what have happened if he didn’t.

I totally agree with you. I wish I didn’t have to sleep and could do all this things.

But it’s for the best to sleep. I know I wouldn’t be well if I stayed up all night.

I wish the same (or have at certain times in my life). When I'm excited about life I wanna stay up all the time. When I'm depressed I wanna sleep all the time.

Part of me feeling INSPIRED and wants to go on my work computer and get work done right now. Gah.

Don’t work extra for free! Gotta keep reminding myself of that.

True that.

Also.....if you do it now they’ll expect even more in the future.....

Absolutely true!

Just hypomania/mania seeping through making me want to do everything!