[Angelique67]

Originally Posted by WastingAsparagus

There's no way I can do this job. It requires so much of me. Sorry guys just venting here.

Good luck, WA. Just keep going, it will be okay.

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[Blue_Bird]

I posted a pic of Miss Mustachio on a cat group I’m in on Facebook and it got 560 likes so far and over 100 comments, they’re still coming in. She’s popular!

I wish I could speed up tonight so it’ll be tomorrow already lol

[Sometimes psychotic]

Originally Posted by Blue_Bird

I posted a pic of Miss Mustachio on a cat group I’m in on Facebook and it got 560 likes so far and over 100 comments, they’re still coming in. She’s popular!

I wish I could speed up tonight so it’ll be tomorrow already lol

I predict someone will be up all night with excitement but sleeping will make tomorrow come faster.

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[Sometimes psychotic]

Originally Posted by Blue_Bird

@Sometimes psychotic : have you bought the happy home paradise dlc for ACNH? I'm getting it soon.

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Nice I plan to max out acnh then move on to happy home in maybe winter when it’s ick out.

[WastingAsparagus]

I missed the last 45 minutes of work because I was feeling like ****. Ugh. Honestly have no idea what to do now.

[Blue_Bird]

Originally Posted by Sometimes psychotic

I predict someone will be up all night with excitement but sleeping will make tomorrow come faster.

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Yeah I probably won't be able to, I'm too hyped up, I'll go to Walmart early in the morning to get what I need come home, call my care manager to have her bring her over, then after my therapy appointment I'll try to take a nap, if I'm able to. It might take until tomorrow night to be able to sleep. I could take my thorazine and knock myself out but I don't want to, I've been off it 3 days now.

[Blue_Bird]

I also feel agitated tonight I wonder if it has to do with Thorazine withdrawal or something. Idk

[Blue_Bird]

I hate APs. I come off them,I get withdrawal effects and can’t tolerate it then go back on and repeat. If I would just stick it through the withdrawal effects.

I just can’t handle being agitated or paranoid. Idk what’s wrong with me. I should just deal with it till it goes away.

[Sometimes psychotic]

Originally Posted by Blue_Bird

I hate APs. I come off them,I get withdrawal effects and can’t tolerate it then go back on and repeat. If I would just stick it through the withdrawal effects.

I just can’t handle being agitated or paranoid. Idk what’s wrong with me. I should just deal with it till it goes away.

Thing is agitation and paranoia are symptoms of the illness returning not withdrawal....it will only get worse after discontinuing meds.

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[Desoxyn]

Originally Posted by Blue_Bird

I hate APs. I come off them,I get withdrawal effects and can’t tolerate it then go back on and repeat. If I would just stick it through the withdrawal effects.

I just can’t handle being agitated or paranoid. Idk what’s wrong with me. I should just deal with it till it goes away.

I know how terrible agitation can be... I went to the doctor with main problem 1. = Agitation, problem 2. = Depression. I was given kpins but they didn't help.. They mostly only help for anxiety. My psychiatrist said 3-4 months ago, "Use them for agitation" but he doesn't get.. Why?;

Agitation was my main problem for the longest I could remember.. We are lifeforms that feel PAIN. This explains schizophrenia well with the SCHIZ opioid theory;

I am that “schizophrenic genius” who someone made a post about the other day : slatestarcodex

I was a little agitated last night.. I spent hours watching Shameless. It's hard to binge watch things cuz I get thinking.. "Is everything on Netflix controlled by the elites?".. Then the news, all investments in the world mostly owned by BlackRock and Vanguard (Rockefeller).

I went to sleep.., and so, I woke up feeling very very good.. So if you can sleep well and often enough, THAT can help with withdrawals.

But importantly:, If you CAN'T withdraw right now (Like in the past), try again another time.. I do this with chems a lot.. It's hard to get off of phenibut - If my mood is too apathetic etc, I take the normal dose and then try again in a few weeks, months.. I've used it for 2-3 years and got off a few times - Good practice.

Don't worry.. You'll find peace. It will be relaxing and content feelings, no anxiety.. Spirituality/religion, meditation etc can help - It's the main thing for mental illness. I believe that schiz/bipolar can be a spiritual problem.. Think of all the Americans suffering right now - It was great, the ego.. But the spirit can only handle so much evil. Alcohol, fast food, mindlessness, manipulation, control, slavery = BORN mental illnesses that develop.

We are here as a symptom of a broken energy in time/space, to heal.

[Blue_Bird]

Originally Posted by Sometimes psychotic

Thing is agitation and paranoia are symptoms of the illness returning not withdrawal....it will only get worse after discontinuing meds.

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Okay, I guess I'll just take the thorazine

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[Blue_Bird]

Originally Posted by Desoxyn

I know how terrible agitation can be... I went to the doctor with main problem 1. = Agitation, problem 2. = Depression. I was given kpins but they didn't help.. They mostly only help for anxiety. My psychiatrist said 3-4 months ago, "Use them for agitation" but he doesn't get.. Why?;


Agitation was my main problem for the longest I could remember.. We are lifeforms that feel PAIN. This explains schizophrenia well with the SCHIZ opioid theory;


I am that “schizophrenic genius” who someone made a post about the other day : slatestarcodex


I was a little agitated last night.. I spent hours watching Shameless. It's hard to binge watch things cuz I get thinking.. "Is everything on Netflix controlled by the elites?".. Then the news, all investments in the world mostly owned by BlackRock and Vanguard (Rockefeller).


I went to sleep.., and so, I woke up feeling very very good.. So if you can sleep well and often enough, THAT can help with withdrawals.


But importantly:, If you CAN'T withdraw right now (Like in the past), try again another time.. I do this with chems a lot.. It's hard to get off of phenibut - If my mood is too apathetic etc, I take the normal dose and then try again in a few weeks, months.. I've used it for 2-3 years and got off a few times - Good practice.


Don't worry.. You'll find peace. It will be relaxing and content feelings, no anxiety.. Spirituality/religion, meditation etc can help - It's the main thing for mental illness. I believe that schiz/bipolar can be a spiritual problem.. Think of all the Americans suffering right now - It was great, the ego.. But the spirit can only handle so much evil. Alcohol, fast food, mindlessness, manipulation, control, slavery = BORN mental illnesses that develop.


We are here as a symptom of a broken energy in time/space, to heal.

Thank you Desoxyn

I think I may be on these meds for life at this point

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[Desoxyn]

Originally Posted by Blue_Bird

Thank you Desoxyn

I think I may be on these meds for life at this point

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I remember my psych nurse/psychologist - He told me as a teenager, "If you take these meds until age 25 - when you're brain is finished developing, you could be cured".

I am 25 now.. I could wait a few more years idk.. But I feel pretty OK though. There might have been a misunderstanding - I complained about anhedonia mostly. So what I was hearing voices and had odd thoughts I was stressed come on..

I remember I had to do a Gaelic oral exam in school - I was having a panic attack almost every day, wearing a uniform, had intense fear of lunch time because I had to socialize.. It was ****ing horrible. Then my moms ex brings me to the prairies in isolation..

I sat all day in the basement, completely * up and deranged. A few years later, my exact room is where people smoked cocaine and where kids did their homework.. It's so much trauma everywhere in my existence.

[Sometimes psychotic]

Originally Posted by Desoxyn

I remember my psych nurse/psychologist - He told me as a teenager, "If you take these meds until age 25 - when you're brain is finished developing, you could be cured".

I am 25 now.. I could wait a few more years idk.. But I feel pretty OK though. There might have been a misunderstanding - I complained about anhedonia mostly. So what I was hearing voices and had odd thoughts I was stressed come on..

I remember I had to do a Gaelic oral exam in school - I was having a panic attack almost every day, wearing a uniform, had intense fear of lunch time because I had to socialize.. It was ****ing horrible. Then my moms ex brings me to the prairies in isolation..

I sat all day in the basement, completely * up and deranged. A few years later, my exact room is where people smoked cocaine and where kids did their homework.. It's so much trauma everywhere in my existence.

The way they consider meds in other countries is completely different than most us docs....here you’re on and it’s for life unless you’re part of an experiment.

[Desoxyn]

Originally Posted by Sometimes psychotic

The way they consider meds in other countries is completely different than most us docs....here you’re on and it’s for life unless you’re part of an experiment.

"This is America! Everyone is on pills!"

[Desoxyn]

But no here in Canada, there's not much of "I'm a doctor and I'll prescribe this certain med cuz Big Pharma pays me some money for it". Here all of the meds mostly are generics. That's why I don't mention brands much here - But the name of the chemical.

[Blue_Bird]

I'm on all generics but I usually just mention the brand name when posting here. The only actual brand name med I'm on is Abilify Maintena. Everything else is generic because that's what my insurance (medicaid) covers

[Desoxyn]

Don't mind me for writing a little weird. I'm completely freaked out by the vaccine mixing with my meds - And the spots.. I think they're going away. They seem to be..

My mom said that she's not letting me get a 3rd vaccine and will sue for an exemption. She went to law school and was a nurse - She's a right brain genius...

Possible trigger:

My coworkers are unvaccinated and they do annoy me.. The antivax energy. Idk why I got them in the first place. This is basically what happened;

- I thought that most people would take the vaccine
- I would get infected with stronger variant viruses and blame everyone else for taking the vaccines

Sure, many people would have died.. But not more people than the virus from addiction, cancer, etc..

I took the vaccine and made a split in my mind. Since I was in the unvaccinated universe, getting vaccinated would bring me to a forked universe where I'd have intense fear - But I wasn't there yet, so my addiction mind was like "Just take it and deal with the consequences later.. - You'll be able to undo the decision when reality allows you to fork BACK to THIS universe again.."

But now I'm in this new one of hell

[Sometimes psychotic]

Originally Posted by Desoxyn

"This is America! Everyone is on pills!"

Pretty much.....

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[Sometimes psychotic]

Shooting stars on my island and all I can think is about the Kappn island where the rocks gave star fragments....and there were shooting stars too.

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[Desoxyn]

Originally Posted by Sometimes psychotic

Pretty much.....

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Sure it is better than dying of diseases.. And people live longer, clogging up the thing. I guess we need robots + Reproduction is becoming scarce..

+ There's a lot of money invested in anti-aging and living longer.

I suppose this is how it goes.. A very weird, cameras everywhere and machine typey world. A matrix.

I'm looking forward to good states of mind - Like I was better depressed cuz at least I was in my own world, experiencing a comforting hopelessness. But this just seems too much like Black Mirror stuff idk

[Blue_Bird]

After the holidays/once kitty settles in I'll apply to get a job as a cashier somewhere local.

[WastingAsparagus]

I am doing better now. It's just my first full-time job.

[junkDNA]

Originally Posted by WastingAsparagus

I am doing better now. It's just my first full-time job.

It's rly hard to adjust to full time.. I started working my first full time job in 2018. I wish I could just work 4 10 hour shifts and then have 3 days off

[Sometimes psychotic]

Originally Posted by WastingAsparagus

I am doing better now. It's just my first full-time job.

I had trouble adjusting from unemployment to part time I can only imagine jumping to full time is even worse.

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