Afraid to look for work

After working in the same industry for over 20 years, in three different companies, I was fired/retired when new technology came in. I tried to learned it but in the same timeframe had a major MVA, back fusion surgery, months of physical therapy and recovery time. I was told I "didn't learn it fast enough". This is the first time I've been out of work for thirty years.

Now I'm afraid to look for work because I'm afraid of being a failure again. I'm even afraid to look for a job. I've applied for SSDI twice and been rejected. We've gone through all our CD's and are now into our Savings.

I'm so scared and tired of being scared and tired.

Hi ashamed to be afraid. Sorry for your losses and suffering in your life. It sounds like you are still grieving. Have you considered a therapist? Being afraid of failure is natural especially after 30 years of working. You have lost part of what you considered your identity. Keeping a notebook of what you want to do during the time life you have in left may point you in new directions.

For me the challenge is to find things that I can do every day that keep me in balance. For me that is yoga, mindfulness, exercise, and positive activities that give me a reason to push through the stress of work and the world.

You can do volunteer work and that can lead you into a new opportunity and serve as a reference point in a resume.

Maybe there is a pattern of the type of company or the type of job that you find stressful. These jobs could be a road sign saying STRESS AHEAD - do not proceed seek an alternate route.

There are lots of compassionate people here that can make the load lighter by sharing and caring. Feel free to participate actively at Psych Central.
http://forums.psychcentral.com

Please feel free to private message me or any of the Community Liaisons by left clicking on the name in blue to the left of their post) for questions or just to share.

Did you attempt legal services with your ssdi applications?

If you've attempted to work with a cognitive decline, which sounds apparent with not grasping the job quickly enough, I don't understand why the denial on two separate applications?

Or vocational rehabilitation centers to assist with getting back to the workforce.

Reaching the end of savings sounds frightful.

I kind of had the same situation back in August. I even went out on a few interviews but no one was interested. I got discouraged, gave up and signed up for disability. I was awarded it on the first try.

I don't understand why some people get denied and others get the first try, but I know I was at my wits end. I didn't really want to "retire", but the stress from working was keeping me in a bad place so I went for disability, however, I don't consider it to be a great answer since I can't really pay all my bills with the amount I get, so I'm going to have to learn to live without a few of the extras.

It leaves me scared about the future and paying for medical bills. I'm quickly using up my savings, too. It's a scary world these days and keeps me anxious for most of the time.

You are not alone.

Hello and welcome to Psych Central ashamed_to_beafraid!!! It's nice to meet you. You have joined a community of warm and caring members who will want to offer you support and advice. Yours is welcome as well.

Please feel free to contact any community liaison or moderator by left clicking on their name in blue to the left of their post if you need help navigating the forums. It will take some time for your first five posts to appear as they are being evaluated and then you will be able to join chats.

So sorry for your struggles. As CANDC has already mentioned perhaps therapy can help you overcome your fears. Try not to fear failure. It's common to all mankind and we will fail at one point or another. When it happens, you get up, brush yourself off and try again.

It's hard to keep up with technology these days. It's travelling at the speed of light. You might consider looking at some of the job requirements in your field and studying them online. That's what I did when my facility went paperless. I had never even owned a computer. I truly feared losing my job over this but managed by the skin of my teeth to stay one step ahead. Now I'm teaching the others. You can do it!!! You'll find we have a safe and supportive community. I'm glad you've joined us.

I look forward to seeing you around!!!

i would try for ss again with a lawyer this time. Sometimes you don't have to pay unless its granted.

I'm sorry to hear about your circumstances. I hope the other members on here can help you. I hope that it all gets resolved for you.

I am sorry to hear that this has happened

You've had a pretty horrific experience to say the least.

The fact that you've managed to stay in the same industry speaks volumes for your dedication and commitment to your field of work.

We all have different learning skills and some things we are not so able to grasp as others.

To this end I'm sorry that it was technology that drove you out. Unforuntately we're living in a highly competative global world and technology is one of the driving forces behind this.

I would suggest - there are certain NFP organisations that do run free computer literacy courses .... it might be worthwhile seeing if you can sign up for one.

If you industry is highly reliant on technology, you might have to consider, temporarily, changing to a different line of work, and whilst you do this, you can work on your IT skills at the same time.

However this turns out, here's wishing you best of luck moving forward.

Please let us know how you go.