In huge trouble

You can rehash the chain of events all you want, but it isn't going to change the bottom line: you have been referred for disciplinary reasons and you need to start handling this situation effectively.

Here is what they would probably like to see from you:

1. An apology for your behavior and a plan on how to handle such issues in the future in a respectful way.

2. No "excuses" for handling things badly. We have to learn to deal with stressors, even and especially if we have mental health issues.

3. No more complaining about what professors you have. You are in a graduate program. You really don't get to pick and choose (usually there aren't many options anyway). You are going to have to learn to deal with people you may not get along with or like. That's part of being in school; that's part of being a therapist; that's part of life.

No, im not saying that at all. If I was, I'd have gone to student disability services. I haven't. I said NOTHING about my diagnosis- I said I had medical side effects from medication, which could happen to anyone. I took a pill and it impaired me, I had a bad reaction and had to go off of it. And I did complete my course. But my psyhiatrist put me on three new pills that caused severe nausea but most important it made me lethargic and unable to think- when I realized it had to be a med side effect I looked it up and it says confusion, lethargy, slowed thinking, trouble finding words- it was comparable to the zombie effect of being on zyprexa or seroquel- just in complete slow motion and inability to do anything but sleep and puke. I had to actually go off the medication in order to write my paper (it was late because I couldnt stay awake to write it, and the moments I was awake I couldn't focus.) -THAT is why I got an A- bc my paper was late, and put me one point under the points required for a regular A.

I dont feel like that is a disability, I just got sick from medication, it happens. I think that should have been worth 1 point consideration, especially if I was willing to do an extra assignment, or the final exam he said I didnt have to take bc I attended the last class.

I'm sorry, I wasn't clear. I was talking about your other posts in this thread. Such as

I wasnt on long term psych meds- I dont take psych meds generally outside of my vyvanse. The meds I was experiencing side effects from were brand new, hence the even stronger side effects, I didnt have the two week adjustment" period to have side effects go away.

And I did NOT tell him it was for psychiatric reasons, I told him only one medication-TOPAMAX- bc it ISN'T a psych med- its commonly prescribed for migraines. I have not told him even once that I had a psychiatric diagnosis, and I didnt apply for anything bc I just didnt expect those kinds of side effects. I should have, from past experience- but I didnt.

In my experience most professors will do something to reflect the late submission of an assignment. Some might grade down a bit, offer more limited feedback (eg this is your grade, no qualitative feedback etc) and, of the lateness hasn't been agreed beforehand I know a good few who won't mark it at all. This is because they are busy, they mark assignments to a schedule and students, particularly post graduate students, are expected to be able to manage their time and work professionally.

In the circumstances I think he was more than fair, I know you don't think so and that's ok but your reaction to his perceived unfairness is way out of proportion and that's an issue if you plan a career working with people, especially vulnerable people. You can't be expected to have everything in place as a student therapist but the basics should be evident and managing yourself and your behaviour is a basic life skill. Others have given good advice about how to approach the disciplinary process, do read it and think about how you might best handle it given its got to where it has and you can't change that.

Profusely apologize and admit to them that what you did was wrong unless you want more garbage thrown at you by the faculty.

Unfortunately, this is how it works in the academic world. Argumentative students, regardless of how much they pay per class, regardless of how RIGHT they are, get disciplined. Splitting hairs with a professor is going to lead the professor's "gang" start closely examining you, and they'll find something wrong if they set their mind to it--even if you are 100% correct. They take offense at criticism and debating because when you question the professor's judgement, you're also criticizing the school's decision to hire the professor.

Remember that when you apply for a program, you're agreeing to abide by their code/rules. This gives them the upper hand. What students see and experience in class and in grading is about 2% of reality from the program's perspective. They are not agreeing to abide by your rules. I know this is extremely unfair, especially since you are paying them, but again the chair you sit in duringchair in classes can be filled by another paying student that got turned down for admission.

I knew something was wrong, and I did tell him it would be late, he said it was ten points per day it was late up to two days- I knew in advance this would put me 1 point under the points required for an A, and I did ask ahead of time for an extra assigment and he said he would think about it and get back to me, but he didnt get back to me, just posted the grade.

As for the paper, when I realized it was the meds I stopped taking the med after the first day when I could not write, so it was turned in the next day- 20 point deduction. Because I had such a high A already, I would still have gotten an A if he had only deducted 19 points, or let me write something extra to get one more point- since it wasnt willful lateness on my part, it was something out of my control. But he refused.

But again, it stopped being about the grade when he said something was wrong with my paper and refused to explain what that was. All I wanted was an explanation, the grade at that point had already been submitted and posted so it wasnt about that.

I wanted to know why he felt the need to be lenient in grading my paper, like I should be grateful he didn't deduct more than 20 points.

So many amazing and thoughtful responses.

There are points from both side that merit consideration. In the end you are the student and need to respect the decision and move on from it.
I hope you find your peace on this and learn from it.

this is a for profit school. they turn down no one. literally. they could care less if you end up employable aftewards.

but everything else you said is true. I will take a xanax before the meeting in order to remain calm, and say little except I'm sorry I was wrong.

You were late, that is what wrong with your paper, if I am reading correctly. If you knew this policy before hand, you don't need extra explanations on it. What would be there to explain?

that isnt what i was asking. i know about the 20 points.

he said; " And that includes me not citing any issues in your final paper which was a show of leniency on my part."

So I was like, um, what? What issues? Can you be more specific, bc I didnt think anything was wrong with that paper, and if I am wrong please tell me what you saw that made you need to be lenient.

That is where he refused and the issue began.

Gotcha, appreciate the clarification!

Oh, what'll probably happen is they'll scare the heck out of you and rub it in your face, trying to get you to explode right there in the room. They might raise their voices or something. Just stay on point and don't let their emotions get to you. Pretend they are your future clients and keep a wise mind. If they accept your apology, they'll probably want to exert some kind of "action plan" or other stuff, "so (from their perspective) this doesn't happen again". It might be helpful to think about things to say when they ask about this not happening again. You can do this!

I remember going through school, the faculty would falsely accuse every student in the class of all kinds of violations, just to test how professional they could be in the face of adversity. Bugger the ivory towers!

Most professors I know won't provide qualitative feedback on late submissions - you got a very good grade so there was clearly nothing so wrong with it that it would impede your academic progress.

I do have concern about a for profit school that "turns down no one" when training therapists. Not everyone is suited to the role and they have a duty of care, I'd expect some level of screening - given your diagnosis I'd expect them to have assessed your suitability for a career as a therapist especially given your struggles with interpersonal relationships. That you find it so difficult is partly their responsibility if they accept anyone.

Since you invited feedback, here's what my impression is:

1) You might be holding yourself to an unreasonably high standard if an A- is so unacceptable to you, that being unable to get it changed and unable to get the professor's reasoning throws you so off-balance. If such a minor thing escalates you to this point, then what will happen when you are faced with dramatically unfair things? It WILL happen. It's life.

2) The intensity with which you pursued getting the grade changed and getting him to explain why it was an A- instead of an A may have made you appear "unprofessional."

3) In my experience, many professors are extremely reluctant to hand out A's. It certainly varies from one professor to another. I've had some that never, ever gave out A's and were quite proud of that. To get an A- and be this unhappy about it is not going to seem reasonable to most people.

4) In the email volley, to me the professor was very reasonable, and was complimentary of your work. As your professor, he is entitled to judge your work as he sees fit. And when it comes to judging written work, there is no black and white to it. It's not a yes/no or multiple choice answer. Most importantly, how a professor judges your papers will be influenced by his overall impressions of you. There is no getting around that reality. In light of that, complaining about such minor things to the point that you tell academic staff that the professor is an *****-hole is going to affect you not only in that class, but others to come. Word gets around, and it may take a long period of serious demonstrations of respect for professors overall in order to counteract the effect of being known among professors as the student who reacted that way to an A-.

If it were me, I would talk to the advisor and apologize. I would humbly face whatever happens with the disciplinary thing. And I would do whatever I had to in order to adapt the way I react to things so that I don't go over the top.

Obviously he didn't have the paper directly in front of him. What did you expect him to do, make an answer up? If this part was really important to you, the best course would be to schedule an appointment during his office hours and go over the paper together.

I've never heard of a graduate school giving out extra credit. Look I'm sorry that things are spiraling right now, but you need to own your side of things and I haven't seen that done so far. I get the frustration...I excelled academically and hated getting a marginally lower grade. But to get the highest possible score, something really should be "perfect". Instead of looking at it as though there is something wrong to REDUCE your grade, think of it as maybe you had a great paper but not perfect.

Did you get back to him when he didn't get back to you?

He doesn't have office hours. Adjunct faculty. And the class was over.

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

That's fine but I'd still like to know what made it not perfect. That's all I was asking. Point it out to me

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Have you looked at the paper yourself to see if you can figure it out? Looked at feedback from the class and apply it to your paper yourself? I am full-time faculty, but I don't waste my time debating grades with students in the situation you describe. Mostly it does not matter what I say - they respond with defensive "but...". If a student wants to discuss it with me, I have them turn in a self review/graded copy they did first and then we will schedule a meeting. If a student comes to my office hour - I give them a pencil and ask them a series of questions and have them mark it - usually they can figure it out from there. Usually after the first one or two times of doing it, they can do it on their own. The brighter/less needy ones can do it without my continued assistance and do it before they turn the paper in and get a better grade for having done so.

He doesn't need to tell you, he graded your paper he doesn't need to tell you why it wasn't perfect. I suspect you'd argue with any explanation he gave you anyway.

Yes, but again if it was OVER he wouldn't have had your paper. I doubt he had the papers of everyone in the class memorized.

I don't think your email exchanges were disrespectful necessarily. A bit overly persistent, yes. Your professor, in my opinion, did handle the situation professionally and fairly. From what I gather, your paper was only docked points for being late, which affected your final grade. It is my understanding many grad schools do not even accept a final assignment if it's late unless a dire, documented circumstance has arisen, so I think you were very fortunate with that. It sounds like your paper was great. It was an A-, due only to lateness. Minus the possibility of a few grammatical errors, it doesn't seem like there is any feedback to give you for you to learn from.

Since you needed to pursue this situation, I think you would have been better served to have followed-up with the chair person for your requested appointment well before the 3 weeks that went by. Yes, she should have contacted you to set up an appointment as she said she would, but after a few days of not hearing back from her you should have again contacted her.

Calling the professor an asshole to your friend where others were able to hear is unprofessional, and demonstrated very poor judgement. I know we are all only human, but there are times and places where doing such a thing cannot happen. Given the field you are going into makes this a bit more concerning.

I think there is also major concern about requesting to switch out of the new class because of this professor. To just up and request a switch out due to a grade he gave you which was affected by the late submission of your final throws up a few red flags as well. This could be viewed by your advisor as "running from the so-called problem" which is yet another concern, especially in the therapy field.

It is my guess the mix of these things is what led to the disciplinary action referral. I can certainly sympathize with your depression situation. It's not fair, and it's not your fault that you were hit with severe depression. Just as your final grade earned is not the fault of the professor. I do hope you can find a way to accept responsibility for what has transpired and work to resolve the situation professionally. You make AWESOME grades so I know you can do this!

It's a great quality in a therapist to admit when you're wrong or have things to learn. I love it when my therapist does that.

You can come away with a lot more than winning an argument that, in the end, doesn't make you a better therapist; using an opportunity for self-reflection and rethinking your approach, however, does.

Ditto what other have said about academics. It's their game. Their rules. Take what you can get and move on. And, btw, taking a loss--whether it's an argument, or a contract or a client--without letting it affect you is a great skill in the professional world. This guy has given you a gift. At this point, the main question is: how to respond in a way that keeps you in the program and moving toward your goal?

Generally in graduate school professors aren't going to go over each deduction with you like many professors will with undergraduates. In graduate school, they are teaching you to be a scholar and practitioner in your own right; if points are deducted, you are expected to have the ability to reread your work and figure out what could be better. It is acceptable to make an appointment during office hours and discuss what you think the weak points were, after you have done that.

The email exchange was disrespectful. An A- in graduate work is, as he told you repeatedly, a very good grade. Continuing to argue after he said he didn't think it was productive crossed a professional boundary. Apologizing and accepting feedback from your advisor and chair about how to handle these kinds of things in the future would probably go a long way to repairing your reputation as a student.

I'm sorry it's hard. Graduate school is grueling without the added burden of new medications and mental illness.