I offically suck at being in college

I am so upset right now, I just want to cry and give up.

FIVE! FIVE TOTAL CLASSES I AM GOING TO HAVE TO RETAKE!

I suck, I just suck, Biology, Criminal Justice, Earth Science, Intermediate Algebra, and US Gov.

FAILED, FAILED THEM ALL!!!

My mom is right, I"m a failure, a lazy ***, I'm no good at anything, I"m going to be working in fast food my whole life, I'm never going to get out of this damned town, never going to accomplish anything, this makes me want to drop out, I'm stressed because I have to hide this all from my family, they can't know or I'll get kicked out, part of the agreement of me staying at home while going to college is that I did good, that I passed my classes, they know about Criminal Justice and Biology, and they can know about math but now more, or I'll be on the streets....

I hate myself, I want to cry, look what I've done, what a mess I am...

I'm never going to accomplish anything...never...

(((((((((( sparrow )))))))))

you are not a failure!

Biology, Criminal Justice, Earth Science, Intermediate Algebra, and US Gov.............

that sure is a heavy load to be taking at one time.

You're not a failure, as first, you attempted to not only go through high school but also college. True failures wouldn't even attempt that, let alone a course such as biology or criminal justice.

If you are going to retake them, then if you wish, I can try to help for the biology part. I'm not in the US so US Gov I'd be clueless in. Algebra I can also help in.

Ty Grayness

and Ty Free2bmee for your kind words, it helps

I am exhasperated right now, my mom flew off the deep end this morning, accused me of doing drugs and looked up my grades online, which means she got in my purse to get my student id to get my information to look up my grades.

I"m not kicked out, my mom admitted she just used that as a threat to motivate me to do good in college, umm no it stressed me out to the point I just didn't do my work because I was a mess...

*sighs* I flipped last night, but my friend Kristin brought me over to her house and made me dinner and we watched a movie till I calmed down, she said it was okay, college is hard, I just needed to learn to buckle down and work a bit harder, but that it is a good thing I wasn't just going to quit and give up and that she would help me learn better studying skills. I felt better after that, and then I got home...:/

My dad gets it, he said I learned a lesson and that he was proud that I was going to college and understood how hard it is and that I just need to work harder next year and that he wasn't going to lecture me, just try and comfort me, he said that I"m hard enough on myself that it wasn't going to help for him to put extra pressure on me.

my mom came in screeching and yelling , and told me to grow up, that I was just being lazy, and that I was hiding things from them and everything. This continued this morning when she woke me up to tell me she had gotten my student id to look up my grades (which haven't been updated by the proffessers since midterms) she then accused me of being on drugs, and that I was crazy, and didn't understand why I was mad at her for invading my privacy, because she did it out of love for me...

I"m so exhuasted right now..I just...I am blank...

oh sweety!!!
You are taking a very very very heavy load! Is there any way you can lighten that load a bit? I know your initial reaction of being a failure all too well. I'm glad, though, that you got comfort from your friend and from your dad. You are so not a failure. You are an inspiration. You struggle and try and don't give up. I'm sorry your mom is being the way she is. You should be very proud of yourself for being willing to accept help, to learn new study skills and give it another shot. I know I'm very proud of you!

Silversparrow,
I'm really sorry to hear that you're going through such a bad time. College work is difficult.
But I'm thinking there's something you're not telling us. Did you study and/or ask for help when the workload become overwhelming? Did you turn in all your assignments on time and attend classes? Don't laugh. Those are the main reasons that students fail.
Perhaps college isn't for you. Have you thought about alternatives?

Not a failure.
Not a failure.

Taking too much at once? Quite likely.
Taking some hard classes all at once? Most definitely.

Being hard on yourself? Yes.
Needing to get your parents to respect your privacy? Definitely.

Your parents had NO right to get into your account. Change your password, change your login ID - but stealing into a person's personal information like that is illegal. It's also not very nice - your parents do care about your schooling, but that's just crazy.

Is there any reason specifically that caused you to do poorly this year? Stress? Anxiety? Course material? Depression? Learning disability?

Perhaps you can talk to an academic advisor and see what you can do to learn from this and manage to make up the classes and all that stuff? Asking them for advice is allowed. If you don't have an advisor, what about someone who can give you that sort of advice?

You do not suck. I've had a crappy year myself and I wasn't even taking that many classes simultaneously!! I've passed ONE since September. Not a good year for me.

You sound like you need to have a sit down chat with your parents. Withhold the information (as much as you want) about your final grades but explain what's been happening with you and your academics. If that's not a possibility - can you move into your own place? Sometimes our parents invade our privacy and make things more complicated than they need to be and the best solution is to GET OUT of the house!

Silver Sparrow,

That was a really heavy workload you signed up for: Biology, Criminal Justice, Earth Science, Intermediate Algebra, and US Gov.

There is more work in college, so you need to lighten your load, and rebuild your confidence.

EJ

Please do not be so hard on yourself! I went through a semester like that and I just had to be honest with my family. Please don't give up! I am living proof that just because you have a rough semester doesn't mean you are a failure. I graduated and am now a teacher. Let you parents know how you feel. They may not realize the pressure you are under. Take care and please believe in yourself!

((((((((((((((((((everyone)))))))))))))))))))))))))

ty so much for the responses, sorry I have been slow to respond.

the five classes I failed where over two semesters, I had to take 16+ hours each semester because of a scholarship I was on, I think it was too much for me, in a sense I am glad I lost the scholarship, it's like the world has been lifted off my shoulders.
Part of it is my fault, part of it is the fact my first semester I was dealing with so many mental issues that I"m surprised I lasted my whole first year of college without dropping out, I almost did drop out my second semester, I was considering it over Christmas break.

Turns out I didn't fail Earth Science , He just posted our final grades and I pulled a C! Which means I only failed four classes.

I"m cutting my classes down to four a semester, I think I'll be able to handle that A LOT, better than the six I was taking a semester, it will help improve my GPA.

I get so angry at myself when I fail things, I feel inadequate most of the time in everything I do besides writing, that when I fail a class it is like a slap in the face, it links back to those feelings and leaves me on a mental self destruct.

But I got up yesterday, and cleaned, gutted my room and put it back together again, it made me feel a lot better, and proved to myself that if I want to do something I can with a bit of hard work and determination.

Peace to all
Sparrow

EVERYONE sucks sometimes

Don`t we have the right to?
Different reasons can lead to that....but its o.k. you will understand the material better next year - because you have learned it already - even if failed - you have some of it in your head.

I tried to do that final project of mine and - have tried a few different ideas and the ****** teachers never like ANYHTING i do....believe me...i sucked not less than you....

So i saw i couldn`t take it anymore..and decided to do the project next year i will have a whole ****ing YEAR to do that!!

There is nothing thats impossible to solve

IMPORTANT:
To know how hard you can work! you can consider it moral, or have a feeling at the begining - that you are willing to study THIS hard but....you know...life is unexpexted....and ...epecially while having mental issues and the such - responsibility is not only taking the load and doing your best to carry ut on your back untill the end - BUt also KNOWING ot measure your working abilities- because what can we do - we cannot jump over our heads!

This happens to everyone. EVERYONE! I failed a course in existentialism and boy was I surprised.

This is a new start for you.

Is there any way you can slow down and take fewer classes?

Stay in touch.

Ty all (((((((((((everyone))))))))))))))))

I am taking only four classes this semester, two a day, so I can breathe, and maybe conquer this classes instead of running ragged.

I guess I"m just flustered, because it hurts, I don't like to fail, I don't like to screw things up. Doesn't help my mom thinks it's a fun joke to tease me about, how she is going back to school and doing better than me. I don't find it funny, if anything it makes me want to give up.

*sighs* I'm ready to be back in school, I miss the challange of it, how it changed day to day, I have summer breaks....

Peace
Sparrow

I went through this. When I left for college I was completely unprepared to live on my own; eventually I got depression and ended up crashing pretty hard. I got kicked out of school because I was in a mental ward and the school determined I was "a danger to self or others" and used that as an excuse. I'd been failing before that.

So... fast-forward a couple of years; I've been trying to get jobs and getting fired because I can't do the job. Finally I managed to get back to school thanks to the vocational rehab people determining that the only thing I'm good at IS school, so it's my only chance at getting a job. (They did neuropsychological testing.)

Been back at school since September. Passing my classes.

What I found out:

1. Asking for help is good. Try the disability service office; you can often get in for emotional problems if you haven't got a learning disability. They can often give you things like tutors, note-takers, or organization lessons. They will not give you anything that gives you an advantage over other students. If you can't get in there, most schools have tutoring services, or upperclassmen willing to tutor for the price of a few dollars an hour or even for free as part of a campus organization mentoring or "help room" proram. Heck, you can probably bribe some of them with your mom's home-cooked dinners.

2. Telling yourself you're stupid or lazy is not a solution, so it's counterproductive. (I have not yet completely managed to stop it... but I try.)

3. Keep your class load at an absolute minimum. Plenty of people take an extra year or two in college, and no employer will look down on you for taking longer to learn things thoroughly. If you start getting A's left and right, you'll know you can increase the load a bit. Not too much--just by one class.

4. If you find yourself calling yourself stupid or lazy, stop it, step back and think, "Exactly what is the obstacle preventing me from getting this studying done?" Identify the problem, describe it, and you can often start looking for a solution much more easily.

5. Do you have any really big weaknesses? For example--do you have trouble reading? Concentrating? Doing math? Memorizing? Take those into account when you study. For example, I have a lot of trouble memorizing information that doesn't easily connect to other information; so I deliberately learn everything in a way that lets me connect it. Plan strategies to get around them instead of just telling yourself you're stupid.

6. Keep your overall stress level down. It's murder on your grades.

7. Learn to break big tasks down into smaller, not-so-overwhelming chunks.

8. Don't be afraid to drop obligations. School is your number-one priority, so you can say "no" without people getting upset about it, generally, if you say "I'm having trouble in school and I need to concentrate on studying."

9. Coffee helps many people concentrate. Try it--but not too much in the evening, if you can help it, because sleep is when you process and store the day's new information, and you definitely need sleep too.

It's summer now; have you considered getting a summer job and squirreling the money away so that you will be able to rent a place if your mom does kick you out? Safety nets are important.

My goodness how can you even think your a failure with that kind of class load??? That is one tought schedule. I go fulltime too and it's only 4 classes. I try to balance them out 2 hard to easier. Try not to take SUCH a jump when registering, the semesters are long and you will reach your breaking point, as you noticed.
~HUGS~ Get back in there and try again!!!

Okay so you are NOT a failure. I would never even attempt to take extra classes and those classes you name are hard ones! Intermediate Algebra? I took beginners college algebra last semester, was only taking 16 hours and had to drop the class because I was failing it by so much. Trust me most people if they tried to do what you did wouldn't even be able to complete the year. So that definitely says something about you! Plus it shows you are ambitious and care about your education which is great and definitely means you are not a failure! I'm glad you're taking a lighter load next semester and I hope everything works out for you. Hugs

Listen up, you are NOT a failure. In elementary and middle school I was not a good student, I had family troubles at home, and I never expected to me where I am today. I go to Univ of Michigan and pulled all A's this year...I am telling you this to ENCOURAGE YOU. I took all the ******** in my life and tried to turn it into something so that I could succeed and one day take care of myself. I never expected to be where I am today or get the grades I am getting. Ask yourself these questions:

1. Do you study hard? If so, great but perhaps you are focusing on the wrong areas and in which case I'd recommend going to see your professors---if you take the care and intiative to go see them they might not fail you if they know you're trying. They are also great at clarifying concepts...and if you are borderline on failing, I hear a lot that if a professor knows you at least tried and came to see them, they will pass you. If you dont study perhaps that's why you aren't doing well...remember college is much harder than high school.
2. Do you procrastinate? Putting things till last minute is never good, get college work and studying done first.
3. Create a private and personal workspace. it sounds like you get a lot of grief at home...why not try going to the library to maintain a good focus.
4. Colleges offer FREE tutoring, really really take advantage of this. Its much easier going to tutors that are your age who can help you, moreso sometimes than professsors (especially if they are mean, difficult, or confusing).
5. Arrange study groups with people in your classes, use flashcards, anything like that can help you.

Good luck and remember you aren't stupid nor a failure. Everyone struggles with something in their lives. College isn't susposed to be easy Let me know how it works out!

college to me is hell. this is my 7th year in college, im failing 3- 6 subjects every semester

College has been a nemesis for me too. I had to take incompletes on 4 classes because I was dealing with insomnia, depression, and a reading disorder. Took me 6 months of vision therapy to get my eyes sorted out and to finish those classes. I felt like a total failure too. But it wasn't over after that. That was my first college. I am now on my 4th and still no degree. I have enough units technically to be a bachelor's graduate, but my classes are in so many varying fields that they don't add up, plus they say my 2 years at the 1st college is not accredited by some insititution they will recognize. So here at college #4 I am a sophomore and in need of vision therapy again, still dealing with depression, sleep issues, and no sign of graduating ever in sight as I only take 6-8 units per quarter and even that stresses me out. I'm a perfectionist, as if I didn't already have enough problems and have just been diagnosed with bipolar. I hope all this doesn't make you feel worse because that was not my goal. I'm just saying that you're not alone in struggling with school, but don't give up on yourself. Perhaps taking one or two less classes and focusing on them, getting a tutor, and finding out if you have some type of learning disability and getting it documented with your school will ease some of your problems. I finally gave in and got mine documented just at the end of this last quarter and I've been in college for 10 years off and on now! Take care of yourself and definitely ask for help from your school, therapist, someone you can trust, etc.

Oh Intermediate Algebra I'll tell you sad tale of a person who failed there math scores in community college and had to take beginning and intermediate Algebra only to realize in another community college that I could have just presented my a.c.t. scores and went straight to college algebra. Wasted hours taking classes I did not need and have to repeat one of them to.

I returned to school at 36 because when I was 18 and just out of high school, it just didn't work. I tried but withdrew 4 times from my late teens to my early 20s...it just wasn't time for me. Since I've regurned, I have done very well because my motivation was there.

You need to ask yourself if this is the right time for you. Maybe you need a break? While I understand there are scholarships that require full-time attendance, but 12 credits is full time in I"m sure 99.9% of the US colleges.

I assume you are an adult now...over 18? I think you need to sit down and speak with your mom. Let her know what has been going on...if you are having problems, let her know. I think that most parents get upset because they want to help, but if you don't let them in, they get frustrated and it comes out in ways that neither you or your parents want it to.

If it is your goal to stay in college, then you need to be honest with yourself about how you had handled yourself with those classes. Maybe you need to study in a different location? If you had been studying at home, that might not be the right place. Also, I'm sure you are realizing that college is not like high school. It is expected that as an adult that you will be doing more independent studying...not just absorbing and spitting out information as when you were in high school.

You are not a failure...you just need to change your mindset, and think about what you want to achieve.

Best of luck!
Kris

{sends an e-hug} I'm sorry that you're feeling so bad and that you have to retake your classes. I hope you do better this next time. Is there a specific reason why you have to retake your classes? The second time around might be easier since you'll know what to expect.

heya... I know I'm WAY late to this post but I wanted to wish you good luck for the next semester. I don't think you're a failure, maybe you were trying too much at once. School can get CRAZY. Many hugs to you

Anyone who takes that many advanced classes id definitely not a failure

Best of luck,

Adam