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#1
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This is really interesting: http://psychcentral.com/news/2007/01...ally-finished/ Ties procrastination to self-esteem. Reading it made me feel better about myself as not everything is procrastination. I do keep forgetting how "long" it takes to do stuff, want it done/finished right away. Sometimes I understand how "crazy" that is; when I have several books I wish were all read or could be all read quickly instead of over time. I know that feeling so should remember it and get myself to take my time and plan/work at something. I guess having a plan/timeline is a good thing even though it will need adjusting as one goes along. Still, it's a "route" so you can't get as sidetracked by procrastination and wanting/thinking there's instant gratification, etc.
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"Never give a sword to a man who can't dance." ~Confucius |
#2
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Though I am not a believer in the "god" part, I found some of the stuff in the book I was led to by this site very helpful in understandingn procrastination. SOmething about all our energies being used to maintain the false self or trying to find the true self..or something like that...anyways here's the link
http://www.conradbaars.com/edd.htm |
#3
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I did have a hard period with my T where I couldn't "want" anything on my own ask I felt my stepmother had already wanted me to want that :-) It was like everything I did was related to my stepmother instead of to me or "my" interests. Would relate to your thought about maintaining the false self/trying to find the true self. But I don't know. . . I've always been pretty sure of my "core" self and mostly just feel like I got battered by my stepmother and created a maze to escape, only got lost in my own maze.
I believe not doing someone one allegedly wants is either "wishing" one wanted it or fear of some sort getting in the way; procrastination isn't a problem in itself in other words but a symptom of something else. I try not to pay attention to symptoms other than occasionally using them to help me find the actual problem so I can work on it. I think symptoms are good things, markers and/or attempts to solve a problem. I don't think we should ever be ashamed of our symptoms as I believe that is a form of being ashamed of ourselves for coming up with a solution to a problem we have, even if the solution doesn't work well anymore or we'd like to find a better one.
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"Never give a sword to a man who can't dance." ~Confucius |
#4
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Perna:
I tend to see procrastination differently: it seems to me that one can become a procrastinator in different ways, e.g.: Some people are very scared of failure, have little self-confidence, and believe it would be awful to fail or to not get the assignment done on time. Their fears cause them to be slow and prone to make mistakes...or prone to give up early when faced with a tough task. Other people may be confident, perhaps over-confident to the extent that they do not allow enough time to do the job. Other people may believe they are doing a better job that is realistic, so they turn in a D paper thinking it is surely an A paper. Some reasonably confident people set very high standards for the final product which they can't achieve...so they give up and often don't turn in any paper at all. I agree with Dr. Steel that several factors are related to procrastination, such as unpleasantness of the task, impulsiveness, distractions, the extent one values completing the task, time involved, and how much time a personis willing to give, etc. Much of putting things off is just a habit, not genetic. What do you think?? I discuss procrastination near the end of my Chapter 4. It is an important habit to get under control. drclay
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Psychological Self-Help |
#5
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I have trouble knowing sometimes, what is procrastination and what isn't. Is it a "feeling" or an action? If you procrastinate "starting" and then get things done well and on time, have you procrastinated/are you a procrastinator or is it just one's style, how one works best (under pressure)? If you're a worrywort and feel like you're procrastinating, are you or do outside observers get to judge? Can you procrastinate at any time in a project or only starting it?
I have my biggest trouble with "wanting" to do something and not doing it. I often can't tell if I really intend/want to do it or only like the idea of doing it. Too, there are "long" projects and I think I should work on them all the time and if I take a break I'm procrastinating and can feel guilty or afraid I won't start again. I do have trouble starting/stopping projects sometimes; I write a paper in too-long bursts, often with equally too-long periods between. I don't know if I should call that procrastination and work on it as such or if it's something else that would benefit from looking at in a different way. I get A's in all my courses but don't like how I study. I got some help from a good book on "how to read" at the college level; it pointed out that you only benefit from reading if you do it the way that benefits you, personally; you shouldn't just sit and turn X pages for Y period of time like some students do and feel virtuous and like "I've done my reading." That's not reading. You have to personally choose what to read and interact with the material. I do that and it works for me but I still feel like I'm not doing it "right." I get a lot more information off the Internet these days, often don't read the recommended texts (or learn the material and then skim the text to make sure I haven't missed anything important; or write a paper by "reading" the material at the same time I'm writing). Basically I "immerse" myself in what's to be learned but that's "messy" and doesn't appear as a "Read Chapter 5 for next week" sort of task? I love neatness and order (rules and knowing what's "expected") but I don't give myself much and that confuses me. It's like wading into a garbage heap and asking "what stinks?" :-)
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"Never give a sword to a man who can't dance." ~Confucius |
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