[Cthomas]

to start up again. Ive been away from cutting for a long time now.

My job is really not secure. im afraid of losing my job and my good paycheck. that makes me really nervous.

I havent gotten paid today and today IS payday. Im ready to walk off the job.

Im ready to do what Ive stayed away from for so long. Im trying to not fall down but im just at my end. im also being weaned off one of my bipolar meds to be switched to another so I know my feelings are all messed up

thanks for letting me vent.

Colleen

[lynn P.]

(((Cthomas))) - I hear you're vulnerable and frustrated but don't do anything to hurt yourself. My golden rule is - never make important decisions when you're upset. You need you job - even if it's not the best. Stay with it until something better comes along.

Did you know when a person self injures, endorphins are released, the same as when we exercise or accidently get hurt. This is why some accident victims don't have a clue they're shot or seriously injured in crashes. You're looking for the endorphin high - you can get this from exercise and some people have luck with holding ice cubes - does it ever hurt!!!

Please be patient with yourself while you make this med transition - you're not your normal self right now, but this WILL pass. So I'm counting on you not to fall back to old ways -stick with positive coping skills - okay ((CThomas))

[Cthomas]

Thanks lynn,

I needed your reply today more than you can imagine. Im trying. Its just the non security part of the job. The med change, the bills due. Im just SPENT!

Thanks for caring, really I mean it. It is making a difference. I need positive today and im running out of the positives.
Colleen

[lynn P.]

Take some slow deep breaths Colleen and hopefully things will get better.

[Cthomas]

Thanks lynn, I will. Im workin on it!

C

[Sannah]

Hi Colleen! Haven't heard from you in awhile. You have been feeling insecure about this job for awhile but you still have the job. Are your fears unfounded?

[Cthomas]

Well the job is a contract job and the people we contract to have a history of non payment.

Theres not much out there right now. im actively looking but not finding much. So theres stress from that as well as are we really goin to have a job in the next month.

I guess the answer is I need to find a job

C

[Christina86]

Originally Posted by Cthomas

to start up again. Ive been away from cutting for a long time now.

Do NOT do that to yourself ma'am. You deserve much better than that. You've dealt with a lot of stressors before, what other healthy ways have you used to cope without self-injury being in the picture?

My job is really not secure. im afraid of losing my job and my good paycheck. that makes me really nervous.

*hug* I hope you don't lose your job, but I can understand how it would be nervewracking and would make you want to relapse because of the amount of stress you're under.

I havent gotten paid today and today IS payday. Im ready to walk off the job.

Your job fails. I'm sorry it sucks so much -- find another job while you can? It's not easy though, especially with the current economy and stuff.

Im ready to do what Ive stayed away from for so long. Im trying to not fall down but im just at my end. im also being weaned off one of my bipolar meds to be switched to another so I know my feelings are all messed up

AHHH. I hate being weaned off stuff. Or you forget to take meds, and your feelings and thoughts and everything is horribly icky and messed up. Don't fall down - can you ask for help right now, extra support to deal? Being weaned off meds is hard enough without all the extra stress right now in your life!!

thanks for letting me vent.

Colleen

Originally Posted by Cthomas

Well the job is a contract job and the people we contract to have a history of non payment.

Is there anyone you can report them to? That's got to be some sort of illegal!!

Theres not much out there right now. im actively looking but not finding much. So theres stress from that as well as are we really goin to have a job in the next month.

I guess the answer is I need to find a job

C

Colleen,

Finding jobs ain't easy. But it's a lot easier to find jobs when we're not dealing with numerous other things. While the temporary "high" or calm from cutting would help in the short term - in the long term you'd just be suffering more and dealing with more ****. And you don't deserve any more crap in your life!

I'm sorry i don't respond much to posts but I wanted to let you know that I still do care about you.

Be well, Colleen.