major setback...

Hi. I haven't been on except to lurk for awhile. Things were going ok, not good, but ok. I took on helping a freind move (major cleaning) to get $ for Christmas. Anyway we are doing alright.

but, my sister set me off. I got upset and do what I do, clean. From top to bottom. I was in the kitchen had all the cabinets cleaned out and was washing them when I banged my head on the corner of the door. It blead a good bit and I have a nice scab from that which I pick off. Not only with my fingers but with tweezers, sewing needles, etc. It is now about 4 times the original size. But now that has started me using sewing needles to just pick at my scalp and pull skin off. I have scabs all over head now.

Which I have now been picking at and causing them to bleed all week. several times a day I am sitting on the bathroom sink, picking at my scalp. The scabbing is horrible and they ooze and burn. And I can't seem to stop.

I have met with my t several times, we have talked about why my sister set me off. How to take care of the places so they don't infect. I just need to stop and don't have the strength or even the want to right now. I'm enjoying this sensation of my head feeling like it is burning. Even as I write, I am picking at the scabs.

Thank you for reading... I just needed to write about it.

I am so sorry that you are in this place right now. I was wondering why I hadn't seen you around as usually we at least cross threads here and there.
I m glad that you have been able to talk to your T about what is going on and that you were able to come back here so we can help support you as well.

oooh {{{ Duck}}} i'm so sorry to hear you are in this condition~! been there, done that~! OCD's are soooo darn hard to treat.... i almost never recommend meds, but sometimes welbutrin can help, and there is one other, i can't remember it's name,, or even a sedative to slow you down,, anything to interrupt the process,,, i have had to wear wigs in public for many years,, and even tho my OCD's are much less than they were, they are not gone,,, i feel that an SI like yours counts as an OCD,, don't you ? best wishes~!! Gus

STOP! Duck you must stop this............

Do you really think this may be an OCD? I do not have that dx. But all my life jokes have been made about some of my OCD tendancies: certain things have to be certain ways. Like my cd's are all catorgorized by type of music, band/musician then usually alphabatized. Books and movies are the same way. Or when I clean. I can't stand certain things "out of place", closet is arranged by color and seasons. Stuff like that. Been that way since a child.

My confirmed dx's are: "hyper-active" (as a child). Dyslexic (I was 19 when this was diagnosed) and Asperger's in 2002 (I was 39).

I have never told anyone until I went onto this site about the sibs. I have been in and out of counseling for years. Have been anorexic too. The t I have now is the first one I have ever told.

I have done this with my head before a few other times. Usually I "burn" my anklesand have multiple scars. Some times in the past I have used shoes, boards or rocks to put bruises on myself - including my face. And one time I actually dislocated my own ankle by twisting it totally out of socket.

I didn't pick at the scabs as much today. I let me kids open their ipod touches, so I was helping them get them set up and downloading apps and such. We had 4 ipods playing tap tap revenge at one time. Noisy but fun!

Anyway, just never really thought that some sib's are related to ocds.

Your profile has OCD listed on it so I thought you already knew? My first thought when I read your post was OCD also. OCD is an attempt to redirect the anxiety that we are feeling. It is an attempt to tell yourself that if the environment is just right you will be okay. I had some OCD tendencies with my anxiety, that I have since recovered from, and what I did was not give in to the needs to arrange the environment and then I sat down and told myself that the environment was not perfect but I'm still okay. It broke this need for me to arrange the environment. I also worked on my anxiety at the same time however. I believe that we develop anxiety when we didn't gain security from our environment while growing up so I worked on feeling secure. Low self worth, boundaries and social skills are also related to anxiety so I worked on that too and so are being triggered so working on triggers too.

I forgot to tie the OCD into this current SI. Try this explanation on for size and see if it fits you: Your sister upset you and this overstimulated you and now you don't know what to do with this overstimulation. The picking on your head helps to settle you a bit?

My gp says OCD. But their have been no formal evaluations like for the Aspergers. So, I do smetimes acknowledge it. but usually beleive it ties in somehow with being aspie. If that makes any sence.