No! No! No!---VERY TRIGGERY

...that's what I keep telling myself. I shouldn't do it because I have no one who is supportive of me and have to one to turn to and just plain have NO ONE! I'm trying to type away...just so I don't cut, don't take pills, don't do anything more drastic than that!

I'm trying to shut everything off but it keeps going over and over inside my head! I can see all of it, me cutting, me overdosing, me hanging myself...all of it I can see.

I know I should call somebody...anybody...but the will and desire is just not there! I don't really want to be around anybody right now! Nobody accepts, supports, or really wants me anyways! My boyfriend and my only friend here don't do any of that! The freakin people at partial could really care less. I think the T's there only call because they have to according to regulations! It's more their civic duty than anything else. So calling some stranger won't help, either! Why the hell would they care?

Hey - none of that. No cutting, no overdosing, no hanging yourself. None of that. I, for one, care and happen to think you're very cool. I accept you and in fact like you.

So don't. Go make cookies, or jog around the block a few times. Do something healthy and soothing for yourself. Make some tea and do some meditative breathing for 10 minutes. Please...

I agree with LMo, do anything else!! There are many here who care about you--friends who wouldn't want to see you come to harm.

Lexicon.
Sometimes it helps me to close my eyes, think of the most calming place I can remember, and just breath in an out. It helps me feel my body, feel whats real. I hope you keep yourself safe.

You have to be your own best friend....the way I see it, Lexi!

Take care of yourself.

Well, I didn't make it. I cut, of course. And I even called Crisis Intervention. To my surprise the only person I cared to talk to got a hold of me. Her name is Sandy and she's wonderful...and a lesbian...so I knew she would understand what I'm going through right now. Anyways, don't worry about me...I never cut deep. Just enough to bleed. I've never had to have stitches for my cuts. So breathe natural. No worries.