So, I went to the doctor...

...I was worried that she'd say "you've managed 5 weeks, you don't need any help" - I've come close to pulling my hair again quite a few times, and I don't want to start again! - but she said even though I'm managing at the moment, she'll still refer me to a psychologist just in case. Although it might be a few months before I can see someone. So now I've just got to tell dad...that should be interesting.

thats great Rio.. See..reaching out sometimes helps

Sure does! Thanks, ethersvirtue.

(((((((Rio))))))))

Good for you!!

You're about to do something I can't - tell your dad.

Good going - putting yourself first and asking for help when you need it!

*hugs* Take care of yourself

((((canders)))) Thanks! I'm not looking forward to telling dad...I have a feeling he's not going to be too happy about me getting therapy. But maybe it won't be as bad as I think...things often aren't.

wow, well haha i wish i was as brave as you. thats amazing. i hope all goes well with your dad..

congrads

Rio you are very brave. Good luck telling your dad.

I can imagine why you'd not be looking forward to telling your dad. I can't seem to bring myself to tell my parents anything. (Tried, and failed)

Good luck! *hugs*

Thanks, woods, bipolar_bear and canders. I told dad tonight...as I expected, he wasn't very pleased about it. He tried to talk me out of it - "it'll go on your medical record...it's just a habit, like biting your nails, you'll grow out of it...one of your mum's friends has been seeing a shrink for years and she's still messed up...once you start seeing a shrink, they'll want to keep you seeing them...of course the websites are going to suggest therapy, they're run by therapists and they'll want you to see them...I wish you'd asked me first..." And I think he's trying to blame himself and mum, as well. I'm wondering if I should have done this, now...it'd better be worth it!

YOU are worth it.

Rio, I'm sorry that your dad has those ideas about therapy. Mental health has been stigmatized, and even though a lot has changed about therapy and mental health treatment, there are still people who only know the old stigmas, and they aren't aware of how it has changed and that mental health is important for everyone.

Ethics now tell us that it isn't helpful for therapists to foster dependency or keep people in therapy longer than is needed. Some people only need one or a few sessions, and that is enough. Others still need long-term therapy because they have more to work on.

Your hair-pulling is more than a habit. It's a fill-in for healthier ways to manage your emotions. You may need to work on being more aware of your feelings and their causes, in addition to learning effective coping skills. You have also mentioned concerns from the past that still bother you, and you will want to resolve that. But from what you have told us, it doesn't sound like you need extensive or long-term therapy.

You will emerge from this strong and healthy, and there is no reason for any stigma to follow you. It's people who are afraid of the stigma that keep the stigma going. They probably have issues themselves that they don't admit even to themselves, so they are lacking some self-awareness.

Good luck with your dad, and everything else too!

Rap

Rio,

Your dad is using a form of emotional "blackmail" in order to force you to do what he wants. Don't let him. You are worth it, and therapy is worth it - and I know you can beat this!

(((hugs)))) Take care of yourself just like you're doing right now! Contact me via PM if you ever need someone to talk to.

Thanks, Halliebeth.

Thanks, Rapunzel. I think he got the ideas from his parents - my gran always believed that people should be able to sort out their problems by themselves.

That's good that therapists won't try and keep you seeing them even when you don't need them any more. I doubt it'd happen anyway with the NHS - they're probably very busy, and the people who see them aren't paying them!

That makes sense - I use it as a way to stop me thinking, sometimes. And yes, I would love it if Dunblane didn't bother me any more! That's good I shouldn't need long-term therapy, though.

Thanks again!

(((canders))) Thanks. I hope I can!