Writing a paper on SI ... not very smart.

As some of you may know, I'm a psychology student at university. This semester I'm taking a class on "Religion & Society" where you do a research essay on a topic of your choice.

We're allowed to choose a topic outlined in the course, and we can tie it to our major as well.

For some reason, the realm of religious self-mutilation was interesting to me, I'm betting because of my SIng behaviour.

So guess who decides to choose that as her topic?

ME! And now I'm sorely regretting that decision.

It's pretty bad that just when doing research that you trigger yourself pretty badly.

I'm taking a break after just half an hour of research because any more reading right now could lead to bad behaviour on my part.

Who would have thought that to escape the world of self-injuring that you self-injure to cope? I didn't think it was possible, but here I sit thinking about it anyways...

Please don't say something as simplistic as "just change your topic"... I have three weeks to write this paper and can't change my topic now. Not allowed, paper topic is chosen.

I just hope that this paper doesnt trigger me to the point where I slip into my old routine again ... I want to, but I don't want to (cognitively and intellectually).

blah. sorry felt the need to rant.

Sending my support and love ((((((((((((( Christina ))))))))))))))

((((((((((Christina))))))))) sometimes you don't know before you start that something will trigger you. I've had that happen to me before, think I could handle it and find out I couldn't after it was too late.

I hope you get through this OK.

Love, Candy

Hi Canders, I understand perfectly as I am a grad student and did that last quarter with a paper. Different topic, same circumstance though with the triggering bit. Proved so bad for me I dropped the course with no refund

Don't follow my lead there. I know you cannot change topic, but this may spin into a positive for you since research requires you to gather all the viewpoints etc on a subject, could you include in your research the ways people deal with SI and treatment? Maybe success stories of people who've overcome SI? Is there room in the paper's subject for research that supports this and you can kind of "use" it therapeutically?

Good luck Canders, take care of yourself ok?

Thanks for your support

((((((((((Fuzzy))))))))))))
(((((((((Candy)))))))))))



Talulah, unfortunately the way this paper is laid out I've got to examine religious SIng as is examined in the journal articles and books I look at. Apparently we're not to "argue" anything or have a thesis, more of a literature review/summarization than anything else. So basically I'm going to be looking at why people self-injure (the religious motivations) and nothing else.

Blah, this is a hard paper to write. I did some more research but the stories of people (snippets) made my thoughts and mood really bad. Think that is the end of research for today. 3 or so hours is a good enough start right? I hope so. Need to just get my head on straight and remember to breathe.

Thanks (((((((((Talulah)))))))))

... I wonder if I'm going to have this much trouble tomorrow, or bad dreams tonight. I hope not, I can't deal with any more stress psychologically right now before I snap.

I do the same sometimes, although it's PTSD related instead of SI - I think I can cope with reading articles on the subject, but it ends up making me upset/angry/confused etc.

Anyway, the only advice I can think of is to keep taking regular breaks so you don't get overwhelmed, and to do something you enjoy (preferably that you can get "lost" in, such as a film or a book) before you go to bed, which might help you sleep better.

((((Canders)))) Good luck!

Oh (((Canders))) please have sweet dreams, Rio is right, good idea about a book or movie to switch the brain out of that dark place.

Remember those breaks, take them and be well to yourself, if you need support, you know where to post or PM.

Thank you very much for the advice ((((((((Rio)))))))

And thank you once again ((((((((((Talulah)))))))))

No problem, hope it helps.

((((((((((((((((((Canders))))))))))))))))

Thanks (((((((((((Jacq))))))))))) as always

((((((((((((((Christina)))))))))))))))))) Please take care of yourself. I am sorry that your choice of topics did not work out well.

Thanks (((((((((bipolar_bear))))))))))

Off to do some more research, aim is to beat 2 hours worth of reading. We shall see.

When I was in grade 12 I had a drinking problem and chose to do a paper and presentation on teen alcoholism. I'm not too sure why I ever chose that topic,(probably because it was the one i knew the most about from the list we had to chose from)and it WAS very triggering, but i found it also to be very enlightening for myself. by you doing this paper maybe it'll help answer some questions you may have regarding your own SI behaviours(assuming you have questions about it. i do with my SI behaviours)
I really hope you're able to finish your paper without being triggered too much. it's great that you know your limits and that you know when you need to take a break from research.

I do hope I learn something from this paper (((((((((nothing_inside))))))))))) thank you for your insight! Need to remember a paper just isn't something to be marked, but something educational to be gained in knowledge (if you're lucky!)

Thanks!

Christina,

I think you have the right idea. Just do what you can, and give yourself a break when you need to. And, yes, look at it as an opportunity to learn something that you can use to understand yourself better and to improve your life. That is the real purpose of writing a paper, much more than the grades.

I'm doing a presentation on dependent personality disorder this week - that's like my primary diagnosis (among others). I see a lot of myself in it, as well as treatment strategies and what I need to do to get better. Sometime I would like to do some research on SI too. I think it is really brave to select that as a topic, and also really good that those who read your paper will learn from the perspective of someone who really understands it.

TC,
Rap

((((((((((christina))))))))))
wishing you all the best, and hope that you can overcome the urges while still delivering your paper. Take care.

Thanks ((((((((((Rap)))))))))))) and good luck on your presentation!!

Thanks ((((((((((irishsj)))))))))))) nice to see you again

hey canders!
well... i understand about all that and bad dreams and stuff,i had a bad dram myself. and it`s aslo natural that we want to understand and chose topics we relate to.

i post on this very topic ALTHOUGH i had a bad dream-and it was YEARS since i SI the last time in my life,
the last time yes. no more after that.

so...are you religious?
i don`t like this thing in christianity and on i would sugest that you focus on how unreasonable SI for religion and and SI on teh whole and that would maybe help you to get farther away from it?

just a sugession. maybe you thought of it yourself.
next time you will be more "smart"

thanks for the suggestion ((((((ladymacabethadmunsen)))))))) unfortunately I have to keep it in a religious context due to the class being centred on religion. would be a nice though to do otherwise. oh well.